"Staub Wounds"
TERESA
Joe takes the girls to Tae Kwan Do class. Gabriella is the middle girl and looks nothing like Melania and Gia. Her features look so soft. She's so cute. Dare I say, she looks like Joe?? Now all three girls are beating on each other. Good Lord.
DANIELLE
Danielle is taking a boxing class that Danny set up for her and her daughters. One of Danny's "fighter" friends is teaching the girls to box. Danielle is pretending the guy is Jacqueline and Teresa. Danielle's daughters are so embarrassed that Danielle is their mother. I have nothing but pity for those girls - I wouldn't wish for Danielle to be anyone's mother. I'm so curious about her ex-husband.
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and the baby arrive at Kim G's house. They start talking about the "incident" and Kim G is horrified by the events of the other night. Jacqueline brings up Ashley and Kim G can't understand why the cops didn't do anything. They both agree that if Ashley gets in trouble that she deserves it because she should not have done anything. This is totally unrelated, but WTF is Jacqueline feeding her baby?? Is it really that difficult to mix your own bottles that you need to buy the pre-made formula bottles?? Pathetic.
CAROLINE
Caroline's family is at home in the kitchen and Albert Sr. comes in and they discuss the wedding event at the Brownstone that day. Chris and Lauren go get ready and Albert Sr. says that Albie is welcome to come in with them and help out if he has time. Albie wants no part of the Brownstone. He feels like a failure if he works there because he sees it as "working for daddy" - which it is, but at least it's something.
TERESA
Teresa goes to Kim D's store and apologizes for what happened at her party. They start talking smack about Danielle. Teresa brings up AGAIN that Danielle was saying her house was "in foreclosed" or "under foreclosure." Um, it's IN foreclosURE.
Kim G shows up and Teresa is surprised to see her. They talk about the other night and then Teresa asks why she's friends with Kim G. Kim G says that she pities Danielle. (insert eye roll here). Teresa says that the thing she does regret is pushing Kim G because Kim G is old and Teresa respects her elders.
JACQUELINE
Ashley and Derek are at Derek's house. Derek says that, while Danielle deserved what she got, it should not have been Ashley to give it to her. Ashley keeps talking about Danielle and Derek yawns. Derek says that he's sick of talking about Danielle and that he hopes Ashley got it out of her system.
TERESA
Teresa tells us that Joe has always been an entrepreneur and then confirms that "entrepreneur" means someone who likes to own businesses. HAHA. Anyhow, he's opening a pizzeria, apartment building and laundromat. They look at the kitchen of the pizzeria. Next they look at the apartment. He shows her around the place and tells her that it's where they are moving. Considering the current state of their finances, he may not be kidding. Teresa is so entitled. She says that she would NEVER live in that apartment. Well, she may not have a choice.
DANIELLE
Why is Danielle always meeting people in diners? It's like she's hiding so people don't see her meeting people in nice places. Particularly, now with Danny and his thug friend. Danielle starts talking about Ashley and she tells Danny that she feels sad for Ashley. She blames Jacqueline for how Ashley is. She thinks the Ashley is trying too hard to try to fit into that family. She pities her but she's still pressing charges.
Danielle says that she's worried most about Ashley is that a year ago she was telling Danielle that she loved her and used to call her all the time. Dumb. Danielle is disgusted that Jacqueline hasn't done a better job with Ashley.
CAROLINE
Albie got a letter from the law school supporting his application to another law school. So now he has to start applying to another law school. He doesn't need to take the LSAT again or wait 2 years, but the application process is a bitch. Albie tells his parents that there is a possibility that he'll have to go out of state. Albert Sr. tells Albie to ignore his mother's feelings and go wherever he needs to go. He tells Albie that he needs to do what he needs to do and they will support him. Caroline says that she's got nothing to do so she'll just go with Albie. HAHA.
DANIELLE
Danielle shows up at the courthouse with a mini entourage and her attorneys. The entourage are witnesses and they say that she felt threatened and that she felt her life was in danger. Danielle claims that she heard a lot of "I'm going to get you" and that someone said "I'm going to kill you." That is FALSE. The witnesses said they heard name-calling.
CAROLINE
Caroline tells Jacqueline that she heard that Danielle was at the courthouse pressing charges against Ashley. Ashley comes to Caroline's house so they can talk to her. Ashley knows that Danielle is pressing charges. Jacqueline and Caroline try to tell Ashley to ignore Danielle. Ashley keeps laughing. She just doesn't get it.
DANIELLE
It's the end of the day and they are talking about the charges against Ashley. She is charged for harassment and simple assault. It's so annoying how Danielle keeps blaming everything on Jacqueline's bad parenting.
JACQUELINE
Kim G comes over to Jacqueline's house. Jacqueline feels like Kim G is two-faced. She is. Kim G tells Jacqueline that Danielle has it out for Ashley and Danielle will do whatever she can to get back at Ashley and her family.
YIKES!
Showing posts with label Real Housewives of New Jersey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Real Housewives of New Jersey. Show all posts
Monday, July 26, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 10
"Country Clubbed"
BEST OPENING SCENE...EVER!!!! It picked up right where it left off last time. Teresa and Danielle go at it and start screaming at each other. Danielle says that Teresa's house is in foreclosure and the gloves come off!! Teresa is chasing Danielle through all the people. Danielle is running with her "bodyguard" and her heels on her shoes break. She finally makes it outside and she's SO F***ING DRAMATIC. He's hyperventilating in a corner outside and she just keeps screaming "Keep her away from me. Get me outta here." Oh good LORD. The drama. No one was trying to hurt her or do any harm to her, but she's so freakin' dramatic. Teresa cannot be held back and while Jacqueline is concentrating on holding back Teresa, Ashley sneaks around and PULLS DANIELLE'S WEAVE as she's being CARRIED away by Kim G's "driver." DRAMA.
No, I don't think Ashley should have pulled Danielle's hair. No, I don't think Teresa should have said "hello" or anything to Danielle. But, FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, Danielle made the situation 10 times worse than it needed to be. She's crying hysterically in the car and just such a freakin' victim. Annoying.
Teresa walks over to the Bentley and insists on talking to Danielle. The "driver" knows Teresa isn't going to "do" anything to Danielle, but tries to convince her to just walk away. Danielle is blowing this way out of proportion. Jacqueline is annoyed by the whole situation and tries to get Teresa to come back to the party and leave Danielle alone. Danielle is in the car crying that she told Kim G this would happen - what happened, Danielle??? Seriously, you freaked out and made a spectacle of yourself.
Ashley walks up and Jacqueline tells her to GO HOME. Ashley brats that Jacqueline is picking Danielle over her own daughter. STFU Ashley. Seriously. You just pulled someone's hair. STUPID. OH GOOD LORD. Danielle cries in her interview that she's in pain physically and emotionally. Physically?? Really? Because someone pulled your hair?? Danielle is all sorts of crazy right now.
Danielle calls the police. DRAMA! Teresa is done and walks away and says that she's over Kim G. Done. Kim G walks out of the car to talk to Jacqueline. Danielle yells to not let Kim G hit Jacqueline. As if! Kim G is not going to hit anyone. As much as she feeds into Danielle's narcissism, she's too classy. Kim G is probably SO HUMILIATED right now. She walks up to Jacqueline and asks what happened. Jacqueline is very calm. She tells Kim G that Danielle talks a lot of shit behind people's backs and when she's confronted she acts like a victim. Kim G agrees and tells her driver to get her bag so they can get the hell out of there.
Inside the "party", Teresa and Kim D are talking and Kim G and her driver walk up. Kim G seems like she's totally on their side. She tells Teresa that she knows she tried to be nice to Danielle. Kim D tells Kim G that she has to make a decision. Kim G is just embarrassed. You can tell. Then, Ashley walks in and tells them that she pulled Danielle's hair because she thought Danielle touched her mom. Teresa says that they told her not to do anything. Ashley is NOT apologizing.
The Police call Danielle and she cries to them that she was "attacked" and "assaulted" and names Teresa and Ashley and Jacqueline. She's horrible. By far the worst "housewife" out of all the shows. She's so annoying. Jacqueline is standing in front of the car because she wants to make sure that nothing else happens and that Teresa stays inside and that Danielle stays in the car.
The Police arrive and Danielle cries to them and asks them to make Jacqueline go away. The Police call Jacqueline over to the car and Danielle starts screaming "NO!!" OMG. Enough with the drama. She cries and cries and says she wants to go home. She interviews that she "will never forget this" and wants the women to leave her alone. If that were true, she would NOT have shown up at the event and she wouldn't be on this show.
The Police keep asking if she's hurt and she keeps saying that she's an emotional mess right now. True. Then she talks about the hair pulling. An officer asks Ashley why she pulled Danielle's hair and she says that she thought Danielle hit her mom. The Police take Ashley's information and tell her that she'll just have to appear if Danielle presses charges. They try to take Teresa's statement but she says that nothing happened and she didn't do anything. Danielle is in the car crying and trembling and Kim G is trying to calm her down. She keeps saying that she didn't want to come. THEN WHY DID YOU??? She's such a liar. If you were really that terrified, then you would not have put yourself in that position. STUPID.
Interestingly, the cops told Jacqueline that they are very familiar with Danielle and her drama. They ended up letting Ashley go. Danielle doesn't understand why they didn't arrest anyone. I'll tell you Danielle - it's because you cry wolf and are a drama queen. That's why.
NEXT DAY
Teresa and Jacqueline are filling Caroline in on what happened and they are laughing and retelling the story. Danielle, on the other hand, is filling Danny in on the events and playing the victim. She says that these woman want to do bodily harm to her.
Jacqueline tells Caroline that Ashley pulled Danielle's hair and that's when Caroline gets concerned. Jacqueline tells her it's because Ashley thought that Danielle hit her mom. Danielle tells Danny that handfuls of hair were pulled out of her head - I actually think it was just her weave - and hurt her neck. Oh, now it's the neck. Oy vey.
Caroline is pissed at them because she thinks they gave Danielle exactly what she wanted. And, she's concerned about what will happen to Ashley as a result. I agree.
CAROLINE
Albie goes to see an attorney. Apparently, if you get dismissed from law school, you have to wait 2 years before applying anywhere else. Yikes. That sucks. I don't think that's the law in CA. The lawyer's assessment is that his school dropped the ball by not affirmatively offering a student with a disability services. So she wants them to write a letter to help Albie get into another school.
DANIELLE
Danielle is driving and gets a call from her "energist". Seriously? Danielle says that she's scared because she thinks Teresa and Jacqueline want to physically hurt her. Paranoid much? The energist feeds into Danielle's drama and asks if she can talk to Jacqueline to try to diffuse the situation. Danielle agrees and gives her Jacqueline's number.
TERESA
OMG. This is the funniest scene. Teresa has to tell Joe what happened with Danielle the other night. She goes through the whole thing and Joe can't believe Danielle is such a drama queen. Teresa mentions Kim G's name and Joe has no idea who she is. Teresa says "she's the older lady." See?? I'm not the only one who thinks Kim G looks old. At the end, Teresa asks "So I did good?" and Joe says "You did good." HAHA.
JACQUELINE
Danielle's energist calls Jacqueline and as soon as she says that she works with Danielle, Jacqueline rolls her eyes. I'm with you, girl. The energist goes into her spiel about how she wants to help Jacqueline move on and Jacqueline says that Danielle is evil and repels everyone. Jacqueline finally agrees to let the energist "help her" and the whole time she is playing a video game on her iPhone. HAHAHA!! Jacqueline is just bullshitting this woman and the energist is feeling like she's making a breakthrough. HAHAHA!!
In the middle of it, Jacqueline asks if she thinks this is helping Danielle. Because that's supposed to be the point, right?
CAROLINE
Albie comes home and tells his mom and dad about the meeting with the lawyer. He doesn't want to get into a big legal battle with the school. He just wants to get back into school...anywhere. I LOVE this family. They are so supportive.
DANIELLE
Kim G and Danielle meet at a diner - I imagine it's because Kim G doesn't want to be seen out and about with the crazy train. Danielle tells Kim G that she's pressing charges against Ashley - you know, because her neck was hurt and she still has trouble "looking up." Stupid. Danielle is SO HAPPY that Ashley pulled her hair because now she has a reason to press charges and go after her. DANIELLE IS SO ANNOYING.
JACQUELINE
OMG. Ashley is really immature. Jacqueline wants to talk about that night and asks Ashley why she didn't just stay out of it like she told her to in the first place. Again, Ashley says that Jacqueline is picking Danielle over her and that Danielle is the saint and she's the bad guy. OMG. Get over yourself Ashley. You did something stupid. You should NOT have pulled her hair. That was dumb and now you will pay the price. Stop being so dramatic.
Ashley says that she had every right to pull Danielle's hair and that she can do whatever she wants to Danielle. Actually no. That's not true. Jacqueline tells her that there will be consequences for what she has done. Chris comes in to talk to Ashley, too. He tells her to mind her own business and that being 18 doesn't mean you get to do whatever you want. She says she can and he asks her who is going to help her now that she's in trouble. She doesn't understand and he asks who is going to pay for an attorney when she has to go to the hearing. She shrugs. Then Jacqueline brings up Facebook and tells Ashley again to stop posting stuff on there. Ashley is SO DISRESPECTFUL to Jacqueline. It's so frustrating.
Chris finally gets fed up and tells Ashley to either be more respectful or get the hell out of his house!! He tells her that she needs to shut the hell up or she's outta there. Damn. Chris is pissed. He tells her that she needs to suffer consequences so that she can learn. He also says that if she wants to be all "Miss Independent" then she can move her ass out and take care of her own damn self. A-MEN!
He ends by telling her that if she contacts Danielle at all, she can pack her shit and move her ass out of the house.
See you next week!
BEST OPENING SCENE...EVER!!!! It picked up right where it left off last time. Teresa and Danielle go at it and start screaming at each other. Danielle says that Teresa's house is in foreclosure and the gloves come off!! Teresa is chasing Danielle through all the people. Danielle is running with her "bodyguard" and her heels on her shoes break. She finally makes it outside and she's SO F***ING DRAMATIC. He's hyperventilating in a corner outside and she just keeps screaming "Keep her away from me. Get me outta here." Oh good LORD. The drama. No one was trying to hurt her or do any harm to her, but she's so freakin' dramatic. Teresa cannot be held back and while Jacqueline is concentrating on holding back Teresa, Ashley sneaks around and PULLS DANIELLE'S WEAVE as she's being CARRIED away by Kim G's "driver." DRAMA.
No, I don't think Ashley should have pulled Danielle's hair. No, I don't think Teresa should have said "hello" or anything to Danielle. But, FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, Danielle made the situation 10 times worse than it needed to be. She's crying hysterically in the car and just such a freakin' victim. Annoying.
Teresa walks over to the Bentley and insists on talking to Danielle. The "driver" knows Teresa isn't going to "do" anything to Danielle, but tries to convince her to just walk away. Danielle is blowing this way out of proportion. Jacqueline is annoyed by the whole situation and tries to get Teresa to come back to the party and leave Danielle alone. Danielle is in the car crying that she told Kim G this would happen - what happened, Danielle??? Seriously, you freaked out and made a spectacle of yourself.
Ashley walks up and Jacqueline tells her to GO HOME. Ashley brats that Jacqueline is picking Danielle over her own daughter. STFU Ashley. Seriously. You just pulled someone's hair. STUPID. OH GOOD LORD. Danielle cries in her interview that she's in pain physically and emotionally. Physically?? Really? Because someone pulled your hair?? Danielle is all sorts of crazy right now.
Danielle calls the police. DRAMA! Teresa is done and walks away and says that she's over Kim G. Done. Kim G walks out of the car to talk to Jacqueline. Danielle yells to not let Kim G hit Jacqueline. As if! Kim G is not going to hit anyone. As much as she feeds into Danielle's narcissism, she's too classy. Kim G is probably SO HUMILIATED right now. She walks up to Jacqueline and asks what happened. Jacqueline is very calm. She tells Kim G that Danielle talks a lot of shit behind people's backs and when she's confronted she acts like a victim. Kim G agrees and tells her driver to get her bag so they can get the hell out of there.
Inside the "party", Teresa and Kim D are talking and Kim G and her driver walk up. Kim G seems like she's totally on their side. She tells Teresa that she knows she tried to be nice to Danielle. Kim D tells Kim G that she has to make a decision. Kim G is just embarrassed. You can tell. Then, Ashley walks in and tells them that she pulled Danielle's hair because she thought Danielle touched her mom. Teresa says that they told her not to do anything. Ashley is NOT apologizing.
The Police call Danielle and she cries to them that she was "attacked" and "assaulted" and names Teresa and Ashley and Jacqueline. She's horrible. By far the worst "housewife" out of all the shows. She's so annoying. Jacqueline is standing in front of the car because she wants to make sure that nothing else happens and that Teresa stays inside and that Danielle stays in the car.
The Police arrive and Danielle cries to them and asks them to make Jacqueline go away. The Police call Jacqueline over to the car and Danielle starts screaming "NO!!" OMG. Enough with the drama. She cries and cries and says she wants to go home. She interviews that she "will never forget this" and wants the women to leave her alone. If that were true, she would NOT have shown up at the event and she wouldn't be on this show.
The Police keep asking if she's hurt and she keeps saying that she's an emotional mess right now. True. Then she talks about the hair pulling. An officer asks Ashley why she pulled Danielle's hair and she says that she thought Danielle hit her mom. The Police take Ashley's information and tell her that she'll just have to appear if Danielle presses charges. They try to take Teresa's statement but she says that nothing happened and she didn't do anything. Danielle is in the car crying and trembling and Kim G is trying to calm her down. She keeps saying that she didn't want to come. THEN WHY DID YOU??? She's such a liar. If you were really that terrified, then you would not have put yourself in that position. STUPID.
Interestingly, the cops told Jacqueline that they are very familiar with Danielle and her drama. They ended up letting Ashley go. Danielle doesn't understand why they didn't arrest anyone. I'll tell you Danielle - it's because you cry wolf and are a drama queen. That's why.
NEXT DAY
Teresa and Jacqueline are filling Caroline in on what happened and they are laughing and retelling the story. Danielle, on the other hand, is filling Danny in on the events and playing the victim. She says that these woman want to do bodily harm to her.
Jacqueline tells Caroline that Ashley pulled Danielle's hair and that's when Caroline gets concerned. Jacqueline tells her it's because Ashley thought that Danielle hit her mom. Danielle tells Danny that handfuls of hair were pulled out of her head - I actually think it was just her weave - and hurt her neck. Oh, now it's the neck. Oy vey.
Caroline is pissed at them because she thinks they gave Danielle exactly what she wanted. And, she's concerned about what will happen to Ashley as a result. I agree.
CAROLINE
Albie goes to see an attorney. Apparently, if you get dismissed from law school, you have to wait 2 years before applying anywhere else. Yikes. That sucks. I don't think that's the law in CA. The lawyer's assessment is that his school dropped the ball by not affirmatively offering a student with a disability services. So she wants them to write a letter to help Albie get into another school.
DANIELLE
Danielle is driving and gets a call from her "energist". Seriously? Danielle says that she's scared because she thinks Teresa and Jacqueline want to physically hurt her. Paranoid much? The energist feeds into Danielle's drama and asks if she can talk to Jacqueline to try to diffuse the situation. Danielle agrees and gives her Jacqueline's number.
TERESA
OMG. This is the funniest scene. Teresa has to tell Joe what happened with Danielle the other night. She goes through the whole thing and Joe can't believe Danielle is such a drama queen. Teresa mentions Kim G's name and Joe has no idea who she is. Teresa says "she's the older lady." See?? I'm not the only one who thinks Kim G looks old. At the end, Teresa asks "So I did good?" and Joe says "You did good." HAHA.
JACQUELINE
Danielle's energist calls Jacqueline and as soon as she says that she works with Danielle, Jacqueline rolls her eyes. I'm with you, girl. The energist goes into her spiel about how she wants to help Jacqueline move on and Jacqueline says that Danielle is evil and repels everyone. Jacqueline finally agrees to let the energist "help her" and the whole time she is playing a video game on her iPhone. HAHAHA!! Jacqueline is just bullshitting this woman and the energist is feeling like she's making a breakthrough. HAHAHA!!
In the middle of it, Jacqueline asks if she thinks this is helping Danielle. Because that's supposed to be the point, right?
CAROLINE
Albie comes home and tells his mom and dad about the meeting with the lawyer. He doesn't want to get into a big legal battle with the school. He just wants to get back into school...anywhere. I LOVE this family. They are so supportive.
DANIELLE
Kim G and Danielle meet at a diner - I imagine it's because Kim G doesn't want to be seen out and about with the crazy train. Danielle tells Kim G that she's pressing charges against Ashley - you know, because her neck was hurt and she still has trouble "looking up." Stupid. Danielle is SO HAPPY that Ashley pulled her hair because now she has a reason to press charges and go after her. DANIELLE IS SO ANNOYING.
JACQUELINE
OMG. Ashley is really immature. Jacqueline wants to talk about that night and asks Ashley why she didn't just stay out of it like she told her to in the first place. Again, Ashley says that Jacqueline is picking Danielle over her and that Danielle is the saint and she's the bad guy. OMG. Get over yourself Ashley. You did something stupid. You should NOT have pulled her hair. That was dumb and now you will pay the price. Stop being so dramatic.
Ashley says that she had every right to pull Danielle's hair and that she can do whatever she wants to Danielle. Actually no. That's not true. Jacqueline tells her that there will be consequences for what she has done. Chris comes in to talk to Ashley, too. He tells her to mind her own business and that being 18 doesn't mean you get to do whatever you want. She says she can and he asks her who is going to help her now that she's in trouble. She doesn't understand and he asks who is going to pay for an attorney when she has to go to the hearing. She shrugs. Then Jacqueline brings up Facebook and tells Ashley again to stop posting stuff on there. Ashley is SO DISRESPECTFUL to Jacqueline. It's so frustrating.
Chris finally gets fed up and tells Ashley to either be more respectful or get the hell out of his house!! He tells her that she needs to shut the hell up or she's outta there. Damn. Chris is pissed. He tells her that she needs to suffer consequences so that she can learn. He also says that if she wants to be all "Miss Independent" then she can move her ass out and take care of her own damn self. A-MEN!
He ends by telling her that if she contacts Danielle at all, she can pack her shit and move her ass out of the house.
See you next week!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 9
"Posche Spite"
CAROLINE
Caroline and her sisters, Frannie and Cookie have lunch. Cookie is number 2, Caroline is number 6, Frannie is number 10 and Dina is number 11. Cookie and Dina look alike. Caroline tells them about Albie and the problem with school. They talk about being empty nesters. They are the cutest family.
TERESA
Jacqueline and Teresa have lunch with Kim "D". Teresa is skeptical because she's afraid Kim "D" is playing both sides. Kim "D" arrives and they all laugh about Teresa's party and how "fun" Kim "D" was. Kim "D" invites Teresa and Jacqueline to her store's fashion show. After Kim "D" leaves, Teresa and Jacqueline talk about whether or not to got to the fashion show. Teresa says that she wants to go, but Jacqueline doesn't want to put herself in that situation.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes over to Posche to confront Kim "D" for inviting Teresa and Jacqueline to the fashion show. She walks in and the employee in the store is on the phone so she puts up a finger to tell her she'll be off in second. Jillian calls Danielle and Danielle bitches to her daughter that the woman was VERY RUDE to her. Who the F does Danielle think she is?? She's some trashy drag queen from JERSEY, not Angelina Jolie!! So, Danielle - very rudely - walks back into the store and tells the woman to have Kim "D" call her when she gets in and then storms out. She totally misses the woman yell out "I didn't get your name." HAHA. Danielle is SO ANNOYING. I might dislike her more than Kelly from RHONY.
Kim "D" arrives and calls Danielle and Danielle yells at Kim "D" and hangs up. So Danielle comes in the store and says that the mistreatment she received from her employee was so disrespectful. Danielle says that she doesn't think she can shop in her store anymore and Kim "D" says that's fine. Danielle keeps being crazy, so Kim "D" asks Danielle to leave. Danielle interviews that she's over Kim and her "little boutique" which I think is amusing since Danielle doesn't even have a JOB! At least Kim is supporting herself and has a little boutique. What do you have Danielle?? A bad boob job and psychological problems?? Then, like the teenager she truly is, she says that Kim "D" will miss Danielle's money, so "haha". Really? Oy!
CAROLINE
Caroline is talking to Albert about feeling depressed because all the kids are leaving her. She wants Albert to retire so that she won't be so lonely. Albert asks if she wants to have a baby. HAHA!! She says NO THANK YOU. Albert is not going to retire. Caroline is feeling lonely. So Caroline asks him to slow down a little. Albert says that he'll never stop working completely. :(
JACQUELINE
Ashley is going to be a "model" in Kim "D"'s show. She tries on some clothes and they love her.
DANIELLE
I think I'm going to start calling her "Crazy". She's just not normal. Kim "D" calls Crazy to apologize for what happened in the store. She tells Crazy she wants her to come to the fashion show and Crazy agrees.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Caroline come over and Jacqueline and Teresa ask Caroline for her advice about the show. Caroline doesn't think they should go. But she says if they go they should take the high road and NOT DO ANYTHING. They agree. But you know Teresa can't help herself.
DANIELLE
Kim "G" shows up with her "driver" to pick up Crazy. Crazy is anticipating drama and so she's going to the event defensive. I don't know why Kim "G" hangs out with Crazy. It makes her look bad. Crazy just plays the victim all the time. SO ANNOYING. Crazy calls the other girls "crazy bitches". Um, Pot? This is Kettle. You're Black.
FASHION SHOW
Ashley arrives and gets all dolled up and ready for the runway. Jacqueline and Teresa arrive and Kim "D" tell them that Crazy will be coming. Crazy shows up with a freakin' BODYGUARD!!! HAHA. She's such a drama queen. Her bodyguard, Dennis, came instead of Danny because Kim "G" had issues with Danny last time.
Crazy felt like it was a slap in the face to seat Jacqueline and Teresa at Kim "D"'s table. And, she was upset that she was sitting directly across the room from them. Ok, there's a catwalk in the middle of the room. She gave Crazy a great seat to watch the show. OY VEY! This woman is out of control. AND, she thinks everything is about her. She says that Jacqueline and Teresa are so desperate to get at her that they befriended HER friend. Whatever. It's more like Crazy's friends need sane people to talk to, so they call Teresa and Jacqueline.
CAROLINE
Albert and Caroline are out to dinner for date night. Caroline says that they need to get used to hanging out just the two of them. Albert says they won't be alone for long because Lauren is going to stop popping out babies soon. He thinks she'll be first unless Christopher brings home some illegitimate kids. HA!! Caroline really wants him to take a Saturday night off once in a while so that he'll be home more. He says he'll work a 12 hour day instead of a 16 hour day. Ugh. He promises to take more time off to spend time with her.
POSCHE EVENT
The Fashion Show begins and Crazy decides to go back to high school. Apparently now she's taking tips from Paris Hilton. She says she could care less about the fashion show. THEN WHY ARE YOU THERE??????? GO HOME! She refuses to clap and she pretends she's on the phone the whole time to "diss" Kim "D". WTF? She says Paris Hilton taught her that. Wow. Kim "G" tells her not to look back and act like the lady she is and pay attention to the show. Kim "G" is clearly embarrassed by Crazy and tries to teach her to be classy, but Crazy isn't having it. Crazy is surprised to see Ashley on the runway and she says that none of the girls knew how to walk. Kim "G" says that they aren't professional models. So Crazy says "that's why they didn't want Christine...they wanted UNprofessionals." UGH.
Ashley keeps staring at Crazy. OMG. Ashley is a TEENAGER!! Why do you care, Crazy?? Seriously. Crazy is out of her mind. She has lost it. Crazy goes to the bathroom with her entourage and Jacqueline walks out to find Teresa and Ashley. She sees Teresa sitting in a chair in the hallway. She says that she wants to say hi to Crazy because they are in the same room and it's stupid to not say "hi". Crazy walks by and Teresa calls her name and says "hi".
Crazy starts walking away and Teresa asks why she can't just say hi. So Teresa asks how she has been and Crazy starts walking away again. Kim "G" tells Crazy that that Teresa is making an effort and to come back. Crazy comes back and Teresa says hello again and congratulates her for Christine walking at Fashion Week. It gets heated and Teresa calls her "honey" and Crazy tells her not to call her that. SO Teresa calls her a "bitch" and Crazy says "that's a fuckin' nuff."
I hate to say it but Teresa totally instigated that whole thing.
Next week will be GOOD!!
CAROLINE
Caroline and her sisters, Frannie and Cookie have lunch. Cookie is number 2, Caroline is number 6, Frannie is number 10 and Dina is number 11. Cookie and Dina look alike. Caroline tells them about Albie and the problem with school. They talk about being empty nesters. They are the cutest family.
TERESA
Jacqueline and Teresa have lunch with Kim "D". Teresa is skeptical because she's afraid Kim "D" is playing both sides. Kim "D" arrives and they all laugh about Teresa's party and how "fun" Kim "D" was. Kim "D" invites Teresa and Jacqueline to her store's fashion show. After Kim "D" leaves, Teresa and Jacqueline talk about whether or not to got to the fashion show. Teresa says that she wants to go, but Jacqueline doesn't want to put herself in that situation.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes over to Posche to confront Kim "D" for inviting Teresa and Jacqueline to the fashion show. She walks in and the employee in the store is on the phone so she puts up a finger to tell her she'll be off in second. Jillian calls Danielle and Danielle bitches to her daughter that the woman was VERY RUDE to her. Who the F does Danielle think she is?? She's some trashy drag queen from JERSEY, not Angelina Jolie!! So, Danielle - very rudely - walks back into the store and tells the woman to have Kim "D" call her when she gets in and then storms out. She totally misses the woman yell out "I didn't get your name." HAHA. Danielle is SO ANNOYING. I might dislike her more than Kelly from RHONY.
Kim "D" arrives and calls Danielle and Danielle yells at Kim "D" and hangs up. So Danielle comes in the store and says that the mistreatment she received from her employee was so disrespectful. Danielle says that she doesn't think she can shop in her store anymore and Kim "D" says that's fine. Danielle keeps being crazy, so Kim "D" asks Danielle to leave. Danielle interviews that she's over Kim and her "little boutique" which I think is amusing since Danielle doesn't even have a JOB! At least Kim is supporting herself and has a little boutique. What do you have Danielle?? A bad boob job and psychological problems?? Then, like the teenager she truly is, she says that Kim "D" will miss Danielle's money, so "haha". Really? Oy!
CAROLINE
Caroline is talking to Albert about feeling depressed because all the kids are leaving her. She wants Albert to retire so that she won't be so lonely. Albert asks if she wants to have a baby. HAHA!! She says NO THANK YOU. Albert is not going to retire. Caroline is feeling lonely. So Caroline asks him to slow down a little. Albert says that he'll never stop working completely. :(
JACQUELINE
Ashley is going to be a "model" in Kim "D"'s show. She tries on some clothes and they love her.
DANIELLE
I think I'm going to start calling her "Crazy". She's just not normal. Kim "D" calls Crazy to apologize for what happened in the store. She tells Crazy she wants her to come to the fashion show and Crazy agrees.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Caroline come over and Jacqueline and Teresa ask Caroline for her advice about the show. Caroline doesn't think they should go. But she says if they go they should take the high road and NOT DO ANYTHING. They agree. But you know Teresa can't help herself.
DANIELLE
Kim "G" shows up with her "driver" to pick up Crazy. Crazy is anticipating drama and so she's going to the event defensive. I don't know why Kim "G" hangs out with Crazy. It makes her look bad. Crazy just plays the victim all the time. SO ANNOYING. Crazy calls the other girls "crazy bitches". Um, Pot? This is Kettle. You're Black.
FASHION SHOW
Ashley arrives and gets all dolled up and ready for the runway. Jacqueline and Teresa arrive and Kim "D" tell them that Crazy will be coming. Crazy shows up with a freakin' BODYGUARD!!! HAHA. She's such a drama queen. Her bodyguard, Dennis, came instead of Danny because Kim "G" had issues with Danny last time.
Crazy felt like it was a slap in the face to seat Jacqueline and Teresa at Kim "D"'s table. And, she was upset that she was sitting directly across the room from them. Ok, there's a catwalk in the middle of the room. She gave Crazy a great seat to watch the show. OY VEY! This woman is out of control. AND, she thinks everything is about her. She says that Jacqueline and Teresa are so desperate to get at her that they befriended HER friend. Whatever. It's more like Crazy's friends need sane people to talk to, so they call Teresa and Jacqueline.
CAROLINE
Albert and Caroline are out to dinner for date night. Caroline says that they need to get used to hanging out just the two of them. Albert says they won't be alone for long because Lauren is going to stop popping out babies soon. He thinks she'll be first unless Christopher brings home some illegitimate kids. HA!! Caroline really wants him to take a Saturday night off once in a while so that he'll be home more. He says he'll work a 12 hour day instead of a 16 hour day. Ugh. He promises to take more time off to spend time with her.
POSCHE EVENT
The Fashion Show begins and Crazy decides to go back to high school. Apparently now she's taking tips from Paris Hilton. She says she could care less about the fashion show. THEN WHY ARE YOU THERE??????? GO HOME! She refuses to clap and she pretends she's on the phone the whole time to "diss" Kim "D". WTF? She says Paris Hilton taught her that. Wow. Kim "G" tells her not to look back and act like the lady she is and pay attention to the show. Kim "G" is clearly embarrassed by Crazy and tries to teach her to be classy, but Crazy isn't having it. Crazy is surprised to see Ashley on the runway and she says that none of the girls knew how to walk. Kim "G" says that they aren't professional models. So Crazy says "that's why they didn't want Christine...they wanted UNprofessionals." UGH.
Ashley keeps staring at Crazy. OMG. Ashley is a TEENAGER!! Why do you care, Crazy?? Seriously. Crazy is out of her mind. She has lost it. Crazy goes to the bathroom with her entourage and Jacqueline walks out to find Teresa and Ashley. She sees Teresa sitting in a chair in the hallway. She says that she wants to say hi to Crazy because they are in the same room and it's stupid to not say "hi". Crazy walks by and Teresa calls her name and says "hi".
Crazy starts walking away and Teresa asks why she can't just say hi. So Teresa asks how she has been and Crazy starts walking away again. Kim "G" tells Crazy that that Teresa is making an effort and to come back. Crazy comes back and Teresa says hello again and congratulates her for Christine walking at Fashion Week. It gets heated and Teresa calls her "honey" and Crazy tells her not to call her that. SO Teresa calls her a "bitch" and Crazy says "that's a fuckin' nuff."
I hate to say it but Teresa totally instigated that whole thing.
Next week will be GOOD!!
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 8
"Bubbies Gone Bad"
CAROLINE
Teresa, Caroline and Jacqueline have lunch and they are sad that Dina is not there anymore. Caroline rehashes everything that happened at the Brownstone. Dina tried to give Danielle the benefit of the doubt and Danielle caused so much drama at that little girl's benefit. They all talk about the possible backlash from Dina's confrontation with Danielle.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to see a plastic surgeon about repairing her wonky fake boob. They agree that she needs another operation to fix it. Danielle is excited to feel desirable again. (insert eye roll here)
CAROLINE
At Lauren's school, it's Avant Garde Day!! Everyone looks all crazy and it's cool. Oooh, Lauren has a David Yurman ring that I totally covet. I love it. Caroline tears up because Lauren is following her passion.
JACQUELINE
Chris and Jacqueline wait for Ashley and talk about how disrespectful she is towards Jacqueline. Chris says that they do a lot for her and the disrespect needs to stop. Ashley says that she has a bad temper and that she's embarrassed about how she reacted and treated her mom. She apologizes to Jacqueline. Jacqueline breaks down and tells Ashley that she's not the enemy and she loves her. Ashley says that she misses home and wants to move back. Chris tells her that she's always welcome to move back but she needs to follow the rules. Chris is a sweet stepdad and so good to Ashley and Jacqueline. I like him a lot. They are my favorite family. I also really love Caroline's family. Teresa's family is a wreck. Danielle's family is a tragedy.
TERESA
Reason #500 why Teresa and her husband filed for bankruptcy: Teresa decides to have the most extravagant housewarming party EVER. Her party planner comes over and is amazed that Teresa doesn't have a "live-in" and does all the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing by herself. I'm actually quite amazed myself. The party planner is getting a little obnoxious. She can't believe that Teresa doesn't have a pool. And her vision for the housewarming party is a "Studio 54" theme. OMG. Teresa and I both are OVER this woman. Teresa practically pushes her out the door.
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes to talk to her mom and Chris about moving back into the house. She's trying to negotiate the rules. She begins with the midnight curfew. She doesn't want a curfew at all as long as she checks in. Chris says she has to have a curfew. He says on the weekend, it's 2 AM and during the week, it's 1 AM. TAKE IT! IF you want to move back in with the 'rents. I think that's fair. It's their house. You don't like it, don't move in. Simple. Ashley says that she'll respect the rules and move back in.
CAROLINE
Albie is upstairs and talks to his mom. Albie says that the first semester at law school, he didn't do so well. He says that it's hard for him because of his learning disability and he's struggling. He tells Caroline that the cut-off to stay a student is a 2.0 and he has a 1.93, so he has been kicked out. He appealed it based on the fact that he has a learning disability and they told him that he might want to try a different profession because someone with a learning disability won't make it as a lawyer. Hmmm. If they actually said that, they are setting themselves up for a lawsuit. Albie needs to get that shit in writing.
Caroline says that she wants him to fight. Poor guy. It's heartbreaking. I'm totally crying right now. Albie is so discouraged and says he feels worthless. How awful. I can't believe the school told him that. I'm so upset for him right now.
CAROLINE
Caroline and her hubby are chatting in the kitchen about Albie. Albert is pissed that the school is being so dismissive about Albie's learning disability and they knew he had one when he was admitted. Caroline is worried about Albie because he's feeling worthless. Albert says that if this school thing is enough to totally defeat Albie then he doesn't deserve to be a lawyer. He says that Albie just needs to know someone believes in him and as long as he knows his parents believe in him, he will achieve everything he wants.
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and Teresa are at Posche and Kim"D" (the owner) is there and welcomes them. They ask about Danielle's luncheon to celebrate Christine's photo shoot. Teresa thinks it was shady that Kim "D" went to the luncheon. Kim "D" says that it was business since Danielle is a customer.
DANIELLE
Danielle is having her procedure done. They are going to remove the old implants and put in new ones. Since this is her FOURTH procedure, it will be difficult. She tells us that getting her breasts done was necessary and not for aesthetic reasons. Really? Who the hell are you kidding?
CAROLINE
The family is having sushi to celebrate Lauren's upcoming graduation. Albie is feeling shitty and they all keep teasing him. They say that he's the cute one, but that some girls recently thought Christopher was cuter than Albie. They aren't slamming him or anything, but Albie is feeling sensitive and vulnerable and this is not cool.
Albie is feeling a bit of an identity crisis. He's used to getting all the praise, so it's hard for him to see praise going to Lauren and Christopher particularly since he just got kicked out of school. AND, he's the one who always studied and took all the entrance tests and graduated from college.
TERESA
Elvira (Teresa's party planner) is at Teresa's house and brought a group of people to help. Elvira is a total bitch to her employees and Teresa confirms this so it must be true. :)
The party is OVER THE TOP. Fire eaters, dancers, bouncers, chefs, etc. Jacqueline calls Teresa to tell her that Kim "G" feels bad that she wasn't invited. (Kim G is Danielle's friend, not the store owner but the mother of Christopher's best friend). Teresa concedes and invites Kim "G". Not a good idea. This is going to end badly.
DANIELLE
Danielle is finished and totally out of it. She says she can't wait to get home to her kids. Really? All drugged up? Why do you want to be with your kids when you're loopy? She claims her girls are happy to see her, but it doesn't appear that they are. HAHA! Danielle is such a sad person. She asks her daughters if they love her. Sad.
TERESA
Teresa's over the top, ridiculous party has started. OMG. There are playmates serving drinks. There's food, neon lights, a dance floor. It looks like a nightclub. Insane. Teresa thinks it's amazing. Kim "G" is there. Caroline is surprised to see her at the party. Kim "D" and Kim "G" came together and they are drunk. Everyone is dancing. There are break dancers and fire eaters performing for everyone. Teresa has the microphone and brings Jacqueline and Caroline up to thank them for their friendship. Kim "D" walks up to the microphone and tells Teresa how nice her house is. It's so bad. Hello, hot mess.
Kim "D" is seriously a drunk mess. Kim "D" and Ashley start talking shit about Danielle. Caroline ends the conversation and tells Ashley to stop. Kim "G" takes Caroline aside and tells her that she thinks Jacqueline is obsessed with Danielle. Jacqueline walks up and hears the conversation as Caroline walks away and Kim "G" starts trying to explain. Jacqueline won't let her and says that Kim "G" is the one who comes over talking about Danielle all the time. Jacqueline doesn't like Danielle but she's not obsessed with her. Jacqueline is OVER Kim "G".
See you next week!
CAROLINE
Teresa, Caroline and Jacqueline have lunch and they are sad that Dina is not there anymore. Caroline rehashes everything that happened at the Brownstone. Dina tried to give Danielle the benefit of the doubt and Danielle caused so much drama at that little girl's benefit. They all talk about the possible backlash from Dina's confrontation with Danielle.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to see a plastic surgeon about repairing her wonky fake boob. They agree that she needs another operation to fix it. Danielle is excited to feel desirable again. (insert eye roll here)
CAROLINE
At Lauren's school, it's Avant Garde Day!! Everyone looks all crazy and it's cool. Oooh, Lauren has a David Yurman ring that I totally covet. I love it. Caroline tears up because Lauren is following her passion.
JACQUELINE
Chris and Jacqueline wait for Ashley and talk about how disrespectful she is towards Jacqueline. Chris says that they do a lot for her and the disrespect needs to stop. Ashley says that she has a bad temper and that she's embarrassed about how she reacted and treated her mom. She apologizes to Jacqueline. Jacqueline breaks down and tells Ashley that she's not the enemy and she loves her. Ashley says that she misses home and wants to move back. Chris tells her that she's always welcome to move back but she needs to follow the rules. Chris is a sweet stepdad and so good to Ashley and Jacqueline. I like him a lot. They are my favorite family. I also really love Caroline's family. Teresa's family is a wreck. Danielle's family is a tragedy.
TERESA
Reason #500 why Teresa and her husband filed for bankruptcy: Teresa decides to have the most extravagant housewarming party EVER. Her party planner comes over and is amazed that Teresa doesn't have a "live-in" and does all the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing by herself. I'm actually quite amazed myself. The party planner is getting a little obnoxious. She can't believe that Teresa doesn't have a pool. And her vision for the housewarming party is a "Studio 54" theme. OMG. Teresa and I both are OVER this woman. Teresa practically pushes her out the door.
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes to talk to her mom and Chris about moving back into the house. She's trying to negotiate the rules. She begins with the midnight curfew. She doesn't want a curfew at all as long as she checks in. Chris says she has to have a curfew. He says on the weekend, it's 2 AM and during the week, it's 1 AM. TAKE IT! IF you want to move back in with the 'rents. I think that's fair. It's their house. You don't like it, don't move in. Simple. Ashley says that she'll respect the rules and move back in.
CAROLINE
Albie is upstairs and talks to his mom. Albie says that the first semester at law school, he didn't do so well. He says that it's hard for him because of his learning disability and he's struggling. He tells Caroline that the cut-off to stay a student is a 2.0 and he has a 1.93, so he has been kicked out. He appealed it based on the fact that he has a learning disability and they told him that he might want to try a different profession because someone with a learning disability won't make it as a lawyer. Hmmm. If they actually said that, they are setting themselves up for a lawsuit. Albie needs to get that shit in writing.
Caroline says that she wants him to fight. Poor guy. It's heartbreaking. I'm totally crying right now. Albie is so discouraged and says he feels worthless. How awful. I can't believe the school told him that. I'm so upset for him right now.
CAROLINE
Caroline and her hubby are chatting in the kitchen about Albie. Albert is pissed that the school is being so dismissive about Albie's learning disability and they knew he had one when he was admitted. Caroline is worried about Albie because he's feeling worthless. Albert says that if this school thing is enough to totally defeat Albie then he doesn't deserve to be a lawyer. He says that Albie just needs to know someone believes in him and as long as he knows his parents believe in him, he will achieve everything he wants.
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and Teresa are at Posche and Kim"D" (the owner) is there and welcomes them. They ask about Danielle's luncheon to celebrate Christine's photo shoot. Teresa thinks it was shady that Kim "D" went to the luncheon. Kim "D" says that it was business since Danielle is a customer.
DANIELLE
Danielle is having her procedure done. They are going to remove the old implants and put in new ones. Since this is her FOURTH procedure, it will be difficult. She tells us that getting her breasts done was necessary and not for aesthetic reasons. Really? Who the hell are you kidding?
CAROLINE
The family is having sushi to celebrate Lauren's upcoming graduation. Albie is feeling shitty and they all keep teasing him. They say that he's the cute one, but that some girls recently thought Christopher was cuter than Albie. They aren't slamming him or anything, but Albie is feeling sensitive and vulnerable and this is not cool.
Albie is feeling a bit of an identity crisis. He's used to getting all the praise, so it's hard for him to see praise going to Lauren and Christopher particularly since he just got kicked out of school. AND, he's the one who always studied and took all the entrance tests and graduated from college.
TERESA
Elvira (Teresa's party planner) is at Teresa's house and brought a group of people to help. Elvira is a total bitch to her employees and Teresa confirms this so it must be true. :)
The party is OVER THE TOP. Fire eaters, dancers, bouncers, chefs, etc. Jacqueline calls Teresa to tell her that Kim "G" feels bad that she wasn't invited. (Kim G is Danielle's friend, not the store owner but the mother of Christopher's best friend). Teresa concedes and invites Kim "G". Not a good idea. This is going to end badly.
DANIELLE
Danielle is finished and totally out of it. She says she can't wait to get home to her kids. Really? All drugged up? Why do you want to be with your kids when you're loopy? She claims her girls are happy to see her, but it doesn't appear that they are. HAHA! Danielle is such a sad person. She asks her daughters if they love her. Sad.
TERESA
Teresa's over the top, ridiculous party has started. OMG. There are playmates serving drinks. There's food, neon lights, a dance floor. It looks like a nightclub. Insane. Teresa thinks it's amazing. Kim "G" is there. Caroline is surprised to see her at the party. Kim "D" and Kim "G" came together and they are drunk. Everyone is dancing. There are break dancers and fire eaters performing for everyone. Teresa has the microphone and brings Jacqueline and Caroline up to thank them for their friendship. Kim "D" walks up to the microphone and tells Teresa how nice her house is. It's so bad. Hello, hot mess.
Kim "D" is seriously a drunk mess. Kim "D" and Ashley start talking shit about Danielle. Caroline ends the conversation and tells Ashley to stop. Kim "G" takes Caroline aside and tells her that she thinks Jacqueline is obsessed with Danielle. Jacqueline walks up and hears the conversation as Caroline walks away and Kim "G" starts trying to explain. Jacqueline won't let her and says that Kim "G" is the one who comes over talking about Danielle all the time. Jacqueline doesn't like Danielle but she's not obsessed with her. Jacqueline is OVER Kim "G".
See you next week!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 7
"Play At Your Own Risk"
DINA
Danielle thinks Dina is acting holier than thou. She keeps bringing up the other girls. Dina tells Danielle that she keeps bringing up last year. Dina realizes that she can't have a normal conversation with Danielle. Dina gets up and Danielle tells her to run away. Dina tells her that she's cutting Danielle out of her life. Dina interviews "you bet your ass I'm running because I don't need to put up with you." Danielle is crazy and Dina tells her that to her face. Danielle tells her to NEVER call her crazy again. Danielle is super loud and drawing attention to herself. Dina finally leaves.
Danielle calls Danny and John to come inside because she's totally shaken up. She recounts the confrontation. She says that Dina ran off because she's guilty. No, Danielle, she left because you're crazy and nothing good was going to come of her staying.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Joe are at Jacqueline's with their girls and they pick up CJ to take them to some farm to play on the haystacks and look at the pumpkins. It's basically a pumpkin patch. Chris, Jacqueline, Derek, Ashley and Caroline are all there, too. There are pigs, horses and other animals. Teresa and Jacqueline keep calling the pigs, Danielle. Nice. The men talk about having a card game and tell Derek that he needs to come to the next game.
CAROLINE
Dina and Jacqueline are visiting with Caroline. Dina says "Let me tell you something. That is one crazy ass bitch." Caroline wants Dina to say that she was right. Dina says that Danielle and her extensions were telling Dina that her REAL hair is fake. HAHA!!! Danielle is psycho.
DANIELLE
Danielle is at dinner with some of her "friends" including Kim G. I wonder what happened to that other friend she had in the beginning of the season. She tells them about her meeting with Dina. Apparently, Dina sent her a very long email. Dina and Danielle both read the email and it actually sounds really sane. Danielle thinks it's crazy. Somehow Danielle feels empowered. WTF? This woman is crazy. She, Kelly Bensimon and Spencer Pratt should have their own show!!!
JACQUELINE
Kim G comes over to visit with Jacqueline. Weird. Kim brings up the Dina and Danielle drama. She doesn't know why Dina would have to cut Danielle out of her life if she wasn't even in it. Jacqueline tells Kim that Danielle would text message Dina. Kim says that she had no idea. Interesting. Kim tells Jacqueline about Danny and John waiting outside while Danielle met with Dina. Jacqueline - and I!! - think that Danielle is stupid and creating drama because she doesn't need any protection from anyone but herself. She's the one hanging out with CONVICTS. Jacqueline says that Danielle played her for a fool. She feels like Danielle conned her and that she goes around seeking out rich people to befriend so she can find a rich man to take care of her. Danielle is all about what she can get from people. Jacqueline isn't really worried about Kim playing both sides because everything she says about Danielle is stuff she'd say to her face. So she's not worried.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to her friend's house with some other friends. She tells them about her "sex tape" and explains that she's been covering up her body because of it. Allegedly, the guy who sold the sex tape is the 26 year old who was friends with Joe, Teresa's hubby. Danielle says that he hid cameras in her room and tape their "intimate moments." Hmmm.
JACQUELINE
It's card night and all the men arrive. Steve, the sex tape guy, comes over to play poker. Jacqueline is disgusted by Steve and upset that he's at her house. Apparently, Danielle told the girls that Steve would text message during sex, but in reality he was recording them. Ok, why would it be ok for him to text message during sex. Gross.
Jacqueline decides to talk to Steve before the game starts. It turns out that Steve never recorded having sex with Danielle. Apparently, the sex tapes are recordings that Danielle sent to Steve of her masterbating. He says the majority of the stuff out there is stuff SHE sent to HIM! Aha! The plot thickens. He's slimy and gross, but I actually believe him.
The guys talk about what they are going to do to Derek to initiate him. Derek and Ashley arrive and he joins the game. Jacqueline, Ashley and Teresa are watching the boys on the monitor. They made him drink this "wine" that is super gross. Jacqueline tells Ashley that she looks like her grandmother who is apparently very large. Ashley is pissed. Chris tells Ashley not to mouth off to her mom. Chris tells her to keep her mouth shut. Ashley keeps talking shit and Jacqueline gets up and kicks Ashley out of the house. Derek stays to finish playing. I'm sure he's a little uncomfortable, but he's probably glad he didn't have to go home with Ashley.
DANIELLE
Danielle and some of her friends go to a strip club (??) to meet up with Danny and some of his ex-con friends. He brings some stripper to teach the girls how to "work the pole." OMG. These girls are practically naked. Danielle says that she used to be a "burlesque" dancer in the 80's. Um, you were a stripper, Danielle. Own it already. When it's Danielle's turn, she really takes to the pole. It all comes back to her. She's a pro. I'll give her that. She really is a true butterface.
DINA
Dina says good-bye to the show. She's happy with her life and her family, so she doesn't want the drama anymore. I don't blame her. I think she's the most honest person on any of these shows. Everyone says they don't like drama, but they stay on the show with all the drama. Dina says she doesn't like the drama so she's getting off the show. Good for her. I wish her the best!!
See you next week!
DINA
Danielle thinks Dina is acting holier than thou. She keeps bringing up the other girls. Dina tells Danielle that she keeps bringing up last year. Dina realizes that she can't have a normal conversation with Danielle. Dina gets up and Danielle tells her to run away. Dina tells her that she's cutting Danielle out of her life. Dina interviews "you bet your ass I'm running because I don't need to put up with you." Danielle is crazy and Dina tells her that to her face. Danielle tells her to NEVER call her crazy again. Danielle is super loud and drawing attention to herself. Dina finally leaves.
Danielle calls Danny and John to come inside because she's totally shaken up. She recounts the confrontation. She says that Dina ran off because she's guilty. No, Danielle, she left because you're crazy and nothing good was going to come of her staying.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Joe are at Jacqueline's with their girls and they pick up CJ to take them to some farm to play on the haystacks and look at the pumpkins. It's basically a pumpkin patch. Chris, Jacqueline, Derek, Ashley and Caroline are all there, too. There are pigs, horses and other animals. Teresa and Jacqueline keep calling the pigs, Danielle. Nice. The men talk about having a card game and tell Derek that he needs to come to the next game.
CAROLINE
Dina and Jacqueline are visiting with Caroline. Dina says "Let me tell you something. That is one crazy ass bitch." Caroline wants Dina to say that she was right. Dina says that Danielle and her extensions were telling Dina that her REAL hair is fake. HAHA!!! Danielle is psycho.
DANIELLE
Danielle is at dinner with some of her "friends" including Kim G. I wonder what happened to that other friend she had in the beginning of the season. She tells them about her meeting with Dina. Apparently, Dina sent her a very long email. Dina and Danielle both read the email and it actually sounds really sane. Danielle thinks it's crazy. Somehow Danielle feels empowered. WTF? This woman is crazy. She, Kelly Bensimon and Spencer Pratt should have their own show!!!
JACQUELINE
Kim G comes over to visit with Jacqueline. Weird. Kim brings up the Dina and Danielle drama. She doesn't know why Dina would have to cut Danielle out of her life if she wasn't even in it. Jacqueline tells Kim that Danielle would text message Dina. Kim says that she had no idea. Interesting. Kim tells Jacqueline about Danny and John waiting outside while Danielle met with Dina. Jacqueline - and I!! - think that Danielle is stupid and creating drama because she doesn't need any protection from anyone but herself. She's the one hanging out with CONVICTS. Jacqueline says that Danielle played her for a fool. She feels like Danielle conned her and that she goes around seeking out rich people to befriend so she can find a rich man to take care of her. Danielle is all about what she can get from people. Jacqueline isn't really worried about Kim playing both sides because everything she says about Danielle is stuff she'd say to her face. So she's not worried.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to her friend's house with some other friends. She tells them about her "sex tape" and explains that she's been covering up her body because of it. Allegedly, the guy who sold the sex tape is the 26 year old who was friends with Joe, Teresa's hubby. Danielle says that he hid cameras in her room and tape their "intimate moments." Hmmm.
JACQUELINE
It's card night and all the men arrive. Steve, the sex tape guy, comes over to play poker. Jacqueline is disgusted by Steve and upset that he's at her house. Apparently, Danielle told the girls that Steve would text message during sex, but in reality he was recording them. Ok, why would it be ok for him to text message during sex. Gross.
Jacqueline decides to talk to Steve before the game starts. It turns out that Steve never recorded having sex with Danielle. Apparently, the sex tapes are recordings that Danielle sent to Steve of her masterbating. He says the majority of the stuff out there is stuff SHE sent to HIM! Aha! The plot thickens. He's slimy and gross, but I actually believe him.
The guys talk about what they are going to do to Derek to initiate him. Derek and Ashley arrive and he joins the game. Jacqueline, Ashley and Teresa are watching the boys on the monitor. They made him drink this "wine" that is super gross. Jacqueline tells Ashley that she looks like her grandmother who is apparently very large. Ashley is pissed. Chris tells Ashley not to mouth off to her mom. Chris tells her to keep her mouth shut. Ashley keeps talking shit and Jacqueline gets up and kicks Ashley out of the house. Derek stays to finish playing. I'm sure he's a little uncomfortable, but he's probably glad he didn't have to go home with Ashley.
DANIELLE
Danielle and some of her friends go to a strip club (??) to meet up with Danny and some of his ex-con friends. He brings some stripper to teach the girls how to "work the pole." OMG. These girls are practically naked. Danielle says that she used to be a "burlesque" dancer in the 80's. Um, you were a stripper, Danielle. Own it already. When it's Danielle's turn, she really takes to the pole. It all comes back to her. She's a pro. I'll give her that. She really is a true butterface.
DINA
Dina says good-bye to the show. She's happy with her life and her family, so she doesn't want the drama anymore. I don't blame her. I think she's the most honest person on any of these shows. Everyone says they don't like drama, but they stay on the show with all the drama. Dina says she doesn't like the drama so she's getting off the show. Good for her. I wish her the best!!
See you next week!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 6
"It's Not Me, It's You."
TERESA
Gia and Teresa are off to an audition for a part in a movie with Christian Slater. Seriously? According to Teresa, Gia's modeling career is taking off, but not her acting career. Um, maybe that's because she's not an actress. OY VEY! They arrive at the audition and I think they're late. Gia walks in and there are 5 kids in there already working with the casting director. Oops. Teresa stays in the waiting area with her baby and the other stage moms/dads. She starts talking to them about Gia and goes on and on and on about how awesome she is. She brags about fashion week and all this other stuff that she's done. The other parents could not give a shit. Teresa ends with "I'm so not a 'stage mom.'" HAHA.
CAROLINE
We're at the Brownstone with Albert Sr., Chris and Lauren. They are working hard and Caroline tells us that the business has taken 30 years to become a success. That's why Danielle's stunt last week was a total nightmare for them. She kept saying that they didn't have a table for her and they kicked her out...both of which are false. She arrived with 6-8 guys who had not paid and did not RSVP. It was a charity fundraiser for a baby with cancer. The fact that Danielle showed up with 8 ex-cons ready to start trouble and then insist that the Brownstone accommodate them is just horrible. I hope the father learned his lesson and realized it wasn't worth it to invite her. She's a skank.
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline brings her baby with her while she gets a pedicure. Kim "G", Danielle's friend, comes in for a mani/pedi and sits next to Jacqueline. Kim "G" seems like she's in her late 50's, but she dresses like she's in her late 20's/early 30's. It's so bizarre. The baby is crying so Jacqueline carries him while she gets her pedicure. She's trying to avoid a "Danielle" conversation. Kim "G" tells Jacqueline that they arrived at the Brownstone and Danielle had an entourage of thugs waiting for them. Kim says that she was embarrassed and uncomfortable to be there. It's so random. Kim seems like a very conservative, proper, ladylike woman. I find it so fascinating that she calls Danielle her "friend." She seemed so out of place with those ex-cons. She's basically telling Jacqueline that she doesn't like the company that Danielle keeps. Kim tells Jacqueline that she wants to talk to Danielle about it.
Jacqueline laughs. She tells Kim that you can't say anything negative to Danielle or she will blow up at you. Very true.
DANIELLE
Kim throws Danielle a birthday party and they are getting their hair and make-up done beforehand to get ready. While they are getting ready, Kim confirms with Danielle that Danny is not coming. Danielle says she can call him and Kim says NO! She tells Danielle that she is really upset about the name-calling that happened at the Brownstone. She is referring to Danny calling Christopher a "faggot." Danielle immediately gets defensive and says that Danny didn't call a gay man a "faggot." OH, I get it. So it's ok to call straight people a gay slur, but not a gay man. I wonder if the same logic applies to racial slurs. Hmmm.
Danielle is such a hypocrite about this. In Season 1, when the housewives and their families were taking dance lessons, Joe remarked that some move looked "gay." Danielle freaked out because she has gay friends and found it totally offensive. But when her "friend" calls a 20 year old a "faggot," apparently it's ok. She's so stupid. It's never OK, Danielle. Straight, gay, bi ... WHATEVER. It's never ok to use a gay or racial slur!!!!
Danielle gets totally defensive. Kim says that Danielle could have picked a better escort. Danielle says that she talked to Danny because she's a "gay advocate" y'all. She just gets super defensive and thinks this is coming out of nowhere. Danielle says "shame on" Chris's parents for putting him out front and not being there themselves so that Chris had to deal with that on his own. Um, why is anyone dealing with ANYTHING?? Kim ends the conversation saying that she didn't like being subjected to that scene and she hopes it doesn't happen again.
Ok, Kim's mother-in-law looks as old as Kim. Maybe Kim looks old, but is really young. Its' so strange. Danielle cries at her party. Danielle says that she learned a lot about Kim that night. UGH. Danielle is so annoying.
DINA
Dina is meeting with her assistant and talking about her Ladybug Foundation. She is shocked about Danielle's scene at the Brownstone at an event for a baby with cancer. Dina is done with Danielle.
TERESA
Teresa's agent tells Gia that they need to work on Gia's Jersey accent. Teresa seems kind of offended because she doesn't even know what a Jersey accent is. A dialect coach meets with Gia to help her lose the accent. Teresa says that Gia doesn't want to lose her Jersey accent and Teresa agrees. HAHA.
DANIELLE
Kim comes over to Danielle's house. Danielle tells her that Ashley has been creating hate pages about her on Facebook. Danielle blows it out of proportion and says that it's like terrorism and the KKK. Um, no it's not. Danielle shows Kim a comment on FB from Ashley after the event. The comment ends with "You and I both know where you're going ... TO HELL. Bye!" Danielle tells Kim that "Bye" is a threat and means that Ashley is going to kill her or have someone kill her. ARE YOU CRAZY??? Yes, you are. Danielle says that she wants nothing to do with the Manzo's but she is always stirring up trouble with them. No, Ashley should not have written that comment on FB, but she is 18 years old. YOU ARE ALMOST 50!!! GROW UP! She claims to not want drama but she's always the one creating it. Good LORD! Stop obsessing about this family and MOVE ON!
Danielle says she feels "threatened" by Ashley. Kim tells Danielle to call the police and have Ashley arrested. WTF?? Kim is just feeding Danielle's craziness.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Jacqueline meet for lunch. Jacqueline tells her that she got a phone call saying that Danielle is telling people that Ashley sent a text message threatening to kill Danielle and she's going to have her arrested. Jacqueline is very upset so Teresa tells her to call Ashley. Ashley comes to the restaurant. Jacqueline confronts Ashley and Ashley says that she never threatened to kill Danielle. Ashley tells Jacqueline that Danielle told Ashley that she's fat. Ashley tells her mom exactly what she wrote. Ashley feels very protective of her family and they weren't speaking out against Danielle, so she did. Jacqueline asks Ashley to stop.
DANIELLE
Danielle takes Danny shopping for a nice suit. She feels like she needs to make him look more polished after Kim's comments. She thinks buying him a suit will change him and make him a better person. I thought she was broke. Danielle gets a call from Dina to meet for drinks and talk at 6pm. Danielle agrees and she and Danny are totally flabbergasted. Of course, Danny agrees to go and hide in the bushes in case anything happens. Danielle is so DRAMATIC. Danny also eggs her on and says that Danielle should expect an apology. Danielle calls Dina back to make sure it's just the two of them. OMG. So ridiculous. Dina is the one who needs protection. Danielle is CRAZY.
JACQUELINE
Ashley is at Derek's house and tells him about her conversation with her mom. Jacqueline calls in the middle of the conversation and yells at Ashley. Apparently Ashley posted on FB that Danielle is trying to get a warrant out for her arrest. Jacqueline is LIVID that Ashley would post anything after they just had that conversation! I agree. Ashley needs to stop. As ridiculous as it is that Danielle is battling with an 18 year old, Ashley really needs to stop. She gets off the phone and tells Derek why her mom is mad. Derek agrees with Jacqueline and tells Ashley to stop and that it's ridiculous to post stuff on FB.
CAROLINE
Caroline has a big dinner with everyone except Dina because she's meeting Danielle. Of course, Teresa calls and says that she's going to be late!! Teresa interviews that she can't be expected to be on time with 4 kids. HA!
They finally show up 1.5 hours late. They have lots of food and lots of family there. I love it. Ashley brings up the Danielle drama. No one wants to talk about her, but Ashley brings it up so they talk about her. Jacqueline tells the family what happened. Chris tells Ashley to ignore Danielle. Ashley says that Danielle started it by sending her a text that she needed to lose weight in her arms. So Ashley responded by saying that she needs to "fix her square tit and she looks like a grinch." HAHAHA!!! Everyone thought that was hilarious, as did I, but they agree that Ashley needs to just stop the nonsense already. Caroline says that Ashley should stop, but she understands WHY she's doing it.
Chris tells Joe about the gay slur and brings up the irony of the situation. Caroline says that what bothers her is that she's going beyond the adults and now she's attacking the kids. Caroline just wants Danielle to go away!!!!
DINA
Dina is getting ready to meet with Danielle. Danielle says that she expects an apology and then calls Danny to make sure that he's available and he tells her that he's in the parking lot.
Dina interviews that she gave Danielle the benefit of the doubt and Danielle made a fool out of her.
Dina starts by saying that they agreed that they would put the past behind them, but the things that Danielle has done recently demonstrates that she hasn't changed a bit. Dina says that the only thing in her life making her unhappy is having Danielle in it. So she's there to tell Danielle that she's done. Danielle gets defensive and brings up old shit. Dina stops her and says it's about her and setting her boundaries. Danielle is constantly interrupting and won't let Dina finish.
See you next week.
TERESA
Gia and Teresa are off to an audition for a part in a movie with Christian Slater. Seriously? According to Teresa, Gia's modeling career is taking off, but not her acting career. Um, maybe that's because she's not an actress. OY VEY! They arrive at the audition and I think they're late. Gia walks in and there are 5 kids in there already working with the casting director. Oops. Teresa stays in the waiting area with her baby and the other stage moms/dads. She starts talking to them about Gia and goes on and on and on about how awesome she is. She brags about fashion week and all this other stuff that she's done. The other parents could not give a shit. Teresa ends with "I'm so not a 'stage mom.'" HAHA.
CAROLINE
We're at the Brownstone with Albert Sr., Chris and Lauren. They are working hard and Caroline tells us that the business has taken 30 years to become a success. That's why Danielle's stunt last week was a total nightmare for them. She kept saying that they didn't have a table for her and they kicked her out...both of which are false. She arrived with 6-8 guys who had not paid and did not RSVP. It was a charity fundraiser for a baby with cancer. The fact that Danielle showed up with 8 ex-cons ready to start trouble and then insist that the Brownstone accommodate them is just horrible. I hope the father learned his lesson and realized it wasn't worth it to invite her. She's a skank.
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline brings her baby with her while she gets a pedicure. Kim "G", Danielle's friend, comes in for a mani/pedi and sits next to Jacqueline. Kim "G" seems like she's in her late 50's, but she dresses like she's in her late 20's/early 30's. It's so bizarre. The baby is crying so Jacqueline carries him while she gets her pedicure. She's trying to avoid a "Danielle" conversation. Kim "G" tells Jacqueline that they arrived at the Brownstone and Danielle had an entourage of thugs waiting for them. Kim says that she was embarrassed and uncomfortable to be there. It's so random. Kim seems like a very conservative, proper, ladylike woman. I find it so fascinating that she calls Danielle her "friend." She seemed so out of place with those ex-cons. She's basically telling Jacqueline that she doesn't like the company that Danielle keeps. Kim tells Jacqueline that she wants to talk to Danielle about it.
Jacqueline laughs. She tells Kim that you can't say anything negative to Danielle or she will blow up at you. Very true.
DANIELLE
Kim throws Danielle a birthday party and they are getting their hair and make-up done beforehand to get ready. While they are getting ready, Kim confirms with Danielle that Danny is not coming. Danielle says she can call him and Kim says NO! She tells Danielle that she is really upset about the name-calling that happened at the Brownstone. She is referring to Danny calling Christopher a "faggot." Danielle immediately gets defensive and says that Danny didn't call a gay man a "faggot." OH, I get it. So it's ok to call straight people a gay slur, but not a gay man. I wonder if the same logic applies to racial slurs. Hmmm.
Danielle is such a hypocrite about this. In Season 1, when the housewives and their families were taking dance lessons, Joe remarked that some move looked "gay." Danielle freaked out because she has gay friends and found it totally offensive. But when her "friend" calls a 20 year old a "faggot," apparently it's ok. She's so stupid. It's never OK, Danielle. Straight, gay, bi ... WHATEVER. It's never ok to use a gay or racial slur!!!!
Danielle gets totally defensive. Kim says that Danielle could have picked a better escort. Danielle says that she talked to Danny because she's a "gay advocate" y'all. She just gets super defensive and thinks this is coming out of nowhere. Danielle says "shame on" Chris's parents for putting him out front and not being there themselves so that Chris had to deal with that on his own. Um, why is anyone dealing with ANYTHING?? Kim ends the conversation saying that she didn't like being subjected to that scene and she hopes it doesn't happen again.
Ok, Kim's mother-in-law looks as old as Kim. Maybe Kim looks old, but is really young. Its' so strange. Danielle cries at her party. Danielle says that she learned a lot about Kim that night. UGH. Danielle is so annoying.
DINA
Dina is meeting with her assistant and talking about her Ladybug Foundation. She is shocked about Danielle's scene at the Brownstone at an event for a baby with cancer. Dina is done with Danielle.
TERESA
Teresa's agent tells Gia that they need to work on Gia's Jersey accent. Teresa seems kind of offended because she doesn't even know what a Jersey accent is. A dialect coach meets with Gia to help her lose the accent. Teresa says that Gia doesn't want to lose her Jersey accent and Teresa agrees. HAHA.
DANIELLE
Kim comes over to Danielle's house. Danielle tells her that Ashley has been creating hate pages about her on Facebook. Danielle blows it out of proportion and says that it's like terrorism and the KKK. Um, no it's not. Danielle shows Kim a comment on FB from Ashley after the event. The comment ends with "You and I both know where you're going ... TO HELL. Bye!" Danielle tells Kim that "Bye" is a threat and means that Ashley is going to kill her or have someone kill her. ARE YOU CRAZY??? Yes, you are. Danielle says that she wants nothing to do with the Manzo's but she is always stirring up trouble with them. No, Ashley should not have written that comment on FB, but she is 18 years old. YOU ARE ALMOST 50!!! GROW UP! She claims to not want drama but she's always the one creating it. Good LORD! Stop obsessing about this family and MOVE ON!
Danielle says she feels "threatened" by Ashley. Kim tells Danielle to call the police and have Ashley arrested. WTF?? Kim is just feeding Danielle's craziness.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Jacqueline meet for lunch. Jacqueline tells her that she got a phone call saying that Danielle is telling people that Ashley sent a text message threatening to kill Danielle and she's going to have her arrested. Jacqueline is very upset so Teresa tells her to call Ashley. Ashley comes to the restaurant. Jacqueline confronts Ashley and Ashley says that she never threatened to kill Danielle. Ashley tells Jacqueline that Danielle told Ashley that she's fat. Ashley tells her mom exactly what she wrote. Ashley feels very protective of her family and they weren't speaking out against Danielle, so she did. Jacqueline asks Ashley to stop.
DANIELLE
Danielle takes Danny shopping for a nice suit. She feels like she needs to make him look more polished after Kim's comments. She thinks buying him a suit will change him and make him a better person. I thought she was broke. Danielle gets a call from Dina to meet for drinks and talk at 6pm. Danielle agrees and she and Danny are totally flabbergasted. Of course, Danny agrees to go and hide in the bushes in case anything happens. Danielle is so DRAMATIC. Danny also eggs her on and says that Danielle should expect an apology. Danielle calls Dina back to make sure it's just the two of them. OMG. So ridiculous. Dina is the one who needs protection. Danielle is CRAZY.
JACQUELINE
Ashley is at Derek's house and tells him about her conversation with her mom. Jacqueline calls in the middle of the conversation and yells at Ashley. Apparently Ashley posted on FB that Danielle is trying to get a warrant out for her arrest. Jacqueline is LIVID that Ashley would post anything after they just had that conversation! I agree. Ashley needs to stop. As ridiculous as it is that Danielle is battling with an 18 year old, Ashley really needs to stop. She gets off the phone and tells Derek why her mom is mad. Derek agrees with Jacqueline and tells Ashley to stop and that it's ridiculous to post stuff on FB.
CAROLINE
Caroline has a big dinner with everyone except Dina because she's meeting Danielle. Of course, Teresa calls and says that she's going to be late!! Teresa interviews that she can't be expected to be on time with 4 kids. HA!
They finally show up 1.5 hours late. They have lots of food and lots of family there. I love it. Ashley brings up the Danielle drama. No one wants to talk about her, but Ashley brings it up so they talk about her. Jacqueline tells the family what happened. Chris tells Ashley to ignore Danielle. Ashley says that Danielle started it by sending her a text that she needed to lose weight in her arms. So Ashley responded by saying that she needs to "fix her square tit and she looks like a grinch." HAHAHA!!! Everyone thought that was hilarious, as did I, but they agree that Ashley needs to just stop the nonsense already. Caroline says that Ashley should stop, but she understands WHY she's doing it.
Chris tells Joe about the gay slur and brings up the irony of the situation. Caroline says that what bothers her is that she's going beyond the adults and now she's attacking the kids. Caroline just wants Danielle to go away!!!!
DINA
Dina is getting ready to meet with Danielle. Danielle says that she expects an apology and then calls Danny to make sure that he's available and he tells her that he's in the parking lot.
Dina interviews that she gave Danielle the benefit of the doubt and Danielle made a fool out of her.
Dina starts by saying that they agreed that they would put the past behind them, but the things that Danielle has done recently demonstrates that she hasn't changed a bit. Dina says that the only thing in her life making her unhappy is having Danielle in it. So she's there to tell Danielle that she's done. Danielle gets defensive and brings up old shit. Dina stops her and says it's about her and setting her boundaries. Danielle is constantly interrupting and won't let Dina finish.
See you next week.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 4
"Babies, Bubbles and Bubbies"
TERESA
Teresa wakes her husband up because she is feeling a lot of pressure "down there." So she knows she's in labor and takes about 2 hours to get ready to go to the hospital. She's packing make-up, clothes, jewelry, etc. She's reading email, making french toast for her daughter and calling friends. Seriously the woman has 4 bags. Who is she??
At the hospital, she's applying make-up. She's so late, they gave away her room. Joe tells her he wants 3 more kids. Teresa says that she's done. He can have the next one. HA! She finally gets a room and is horrified by the gown she has to wear. She wants to wear her own.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Christopher that his friend, "the car wash guy" is in town. So he comes up to meet Chris because, as Caroline tells us, they don't have a car wash to put Chris into, so all they can do is hook them up with one of their friends who has one. I don't know why, but Chris just seems so slimy - like a used car salesman.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters are having dinner. Christine is such a smart girl...it's a shame Danielle is her mother. Christine knows that the modeling industry is a tough industry to make it in. Danielle interviews that Christine asked her not to talk about what happened at the fashion show when she almost threw up and fainted. So, of course, Danielle tells us about it again. Christine says that she'll understand if she doesn't make it. She'll know it was because the industry just wasn't ready for her. Jillian says "and you weren't ready for it" and Christine gets annoyed and quiet. Jillian is a smart girl. Danielle is clueless and doesn't understand what just happened.
TERESA
Teresa is in labor and making calls to everyone. She's even got phone calls on the room phone. She asks Joe what he's going to get her for having this kid. She thinks diamonds are appropriate. He says he'll go to Africa to get them and Teresa is surprised that they have diamonds in Africa. Wow. It's like she lives under a rock. She is getting an epidural and she cries a little, then she immediately gets concerned that her make-up is all messed up. OY!
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes over to apologize for freaking out on her mom last time she was over. Jacqueline says that she just worries about Ashley. Jacqueline asks Ashley if she'd be interested in seeing a Life Coach. Ashley thinks it's a dumb idea because she already has a plan. Her plan is to take a year off, then go to junior college in the spring and transfer to a four-year college in the fall. She has no idea what she wants to study or where. But she has a plan, y'all.
CAROLINE
Chris goes to a strip club to meet up with the manager because he really wants to do his strip club/car wash business. The manager tells him that it's not a "strip club", it's a gentleman's club. Oh Lord! He tells Chris to get the "feel" for a gentleman's club. Um, he's not even 21. Albie shows up with his buddy, Frank. Who are these people??
TERESA
She's screaming like a banshee. It's a GIRL!!! Teresa sounds like Fran Dresher. The baby name is Audriana. She's really cute.
JACQUELINE
She and Chris have a glass of wine. She wants to talk about Ashley. She tells him about the Life Coach idea and Chris starts laughing. He says that when he was growing up, it was a beating. Dina interviews that a wooden spoon is a much more effective coach. There's a HUGE safe in the room and she insists on seeing what is inside. It's like an arsenal. INSANE and terrifying.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to a diner to meet her friend, Kathy. Kathy tells Danielle that the owner of the diner has a baby who has cancer. So he's having a fundraiser for her daughter and wants Danielle to come to support the baby. Danielle says that she will absolutely be at the fundraiser and do whatever she can for the baby. She finds out that the event is at the Brownstone. She "claims" that she doesn't want to go to the Brownstone but she will go there for this baby. (insert eyeroll here).
DINA
Caroline and Jacqueline meet up with Dina because she wants to talk to them. Dina tells them that she needs to talk to Danielle - in person - to tell her that she doesn't want her in her life anymore. Caroline and Jacqueline don't understand why she needs to meet with Danielle to "tell" her this. I agree. I always think it's weird when girls "break up" with their friends. If you don't want to talk to someone or have them in your life anymore, then just stop. That's all you have to do! It's just so dramatic. I think it's unnecessary, but maybe Dina just needs that for closure.
CAROLINE
Chris is working for the day at the family friend's car wash. Rick leaves Chris in charge for the day to see how he does. Chris's first action is to bring in the skanks...er...girls. They put on the T-Shirts and try to bring in business with their daisy dukes and tight shirts. It works!! Caroline stops by to check in on Chris and she is a little concerned about all the girls. She meets "Bianca" outside and then walks inside and meets a "Bianca" look-a-like, "Nicole". Rick shows up at the end of the day and he's in SHOCK! He says he wouldn't have brought in the girls, but he's SO EXCITED by the huge amount of business!! This may not be such a bad idea after all.
DANIELLE
Danielle is at her friend, Danny's house. Danny is an ex-con who is on parole. John is Danny's thug friend and he's there, too. Danielle tells him about her rift with the Manzo's. John and Danny are both ex-felons. Danielle is just creating drama for herself. She asks Danny and John to escort her to the Brownstone event because she's afraid of something going down. Are you kidding? What are they going to do to Danielle at a charity event?? It's so ridiculous. She's so dramatic. They agree and Danielle tells us "When Danny takes my back, people better be listening." Get over yourself! Seriously??
DINA
Dina brings a GINORMOUS teddy bear for baby Audriana. She's super cute. She's got a knit cap with a huge flower on it. Teresa is in leopard print pajamas. Teresa asks Dina to be Audriana's godmother. Dina gets all emotional. It's so sweet.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Caroline that Danielle is coming to the Brownstone for the charity event. Caroline is skeptical about why Danielle is going. I am, too!!
See you next week!
TERESA
Teresa wakes her husband up because she is feeling a lot of pressure "down there." So she knows she's in labor and takes about 2 hours to get ready to go to the hospital. She's packing make-up, clothes, jewelry, etc. She's reading email, making french toast for her daughter and calling friends. Seriously the woman has 4 bags. Who is she??
At the hospital, she's applying make-up. She's so late, they gave away her room. Joe tells her he wants 3 more kids. Teresa says that she's done. He can have the next one. HA! She finally gets a room and is horrified by the gown she has to wear. She wants to wear her own.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Christopher that his friend, "the car wash guy" is in town. So he comes up to meet Chris because, as Caroline tells us, they don't have a car wash to put Chris into, so all they can do is hook them up with one of their friends who has one. I don't know why, but Chris just seems so slimy - like a used car salesman.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters are having dinner. Christine is such a smart girl...it's a shame Danielle is her mother. Christine knows that the modeling industry is a tough industry to make it in. Danielle interviews that Christine asked her not to talk about what happened at the fashion show when she almost threw up and fainted. So, of course, Danielle tells us about it again. Christine says that she'll understand if she doesn't make it. She'll know it was because the industry just wasn't ready for her. Jillian says "and you weren't ready for it" and Christine gets annoyed and quiet. Jillian is a smart girl. Danielle is clueless and doesn't understand what just happened.
TERESA
Teresa is in labor and making calls to everyone. She's even got phone calls on the room phone. She asks Joe what he's going to get her for having this kid. She thinks diamonds are appropriate. He says he'll go to Africa to get them and Teresa is surprised that they have diamonds in Africa. Wow. It's like she lives under a rock. She is getting an epidural and she cries a little, then she immediately gets concerned that her make-up is all messed up. OY!
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes over to apologize for freaking out on her mom last time she was over. Jacqueline says that she just worries about Ashley. Jacqueline asks Ashley if she'd be interested in seeing a Life Coach. Ashley thinks it's a dumb idea because she already has a plan. Her plan is to take a year off, then go to junior college in the spring and transfer to a four-year college in the fall. She has no idea what she wants to study or where. But she has a plan, y'all.
CAROLINE
Chris goes to a strip club to meet up with the manager because he really wants to do his strip club/car wash business. The manager tells him that it's not a "strip club", it's a gentleman's club. Oh Lord! He tells Chris to get the "feel" for a gentleman's club. Um, he's not even 21. Albie shows up with his buddy, Frank. Who are these people??
TERESA
She's screaming like a banshee. It's a GIRL!!! Teresa sounds like Fran Dresher. The baby name is Audriana. She's really cute.
JACQUELINE
She and Chris have a glass of wine. She wants to talk about Ashley. She tells him about the Life Coach idea and Chris starts laughing. He says that when he was growing up, it was a beating. Dina interviews that a wooden spoon is a much more effective coach. There's a HUGE safe in the room and she insists on seeing what is inside. It's like an arsenal. INSANE and terrifying.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to a diner to meet her friend, Kathy. Kathy tells Danielle that the owner of the diner has a baby who has cancer. So he's having a fundraiser for her daughter and wants Danielle to come to support the baby. Danielle says that she will absolutely be at the fundraiser and do whatever she can for the baby. She finds out that the event is at the Brownstone. She "claims" that she doesn't want to go to the Brownstone but she will go there for this baby. (insert eyeroll here).
DINA
Caroline and Jacqueline meet up with Dina because she wants to talk to them. Dina tells them that she needs to talk to Danielle - in person - to tell her that she doesn't want her in her life anymore. Caroline and Jacqueline don't understand why she needs to meet with Danielle to "tell" her this. I agree. I always think it's weird when girls "break up" with their friends. If you don't want to talk to someone or have them in your life anymore, then just stop. That's all you have to do! It's just so dramatic. I think it's unnecessary, but maybe Dina just needs that for closure.
CAROLINE
Chris is working for the day at the family friend's car wash. Rick leaves Chris in charge for the day to see how he does. Chris's first action is to bring in the skanks...er...girls. They put on the T-Shirts and try to bring in business with their daisy dukes and tight shirts. It works!! Caroline stops by to check in on Chris and she is a little concerned about all the girls. She meets "Bianca" outside and then walks inside and meets a "Bianca" look-a-like, "Nicole". Rick shows up at the end of the day and he's in SHOCK! He says he wouldn't have brought in the girls, but he's SO EXCITED by the huge amount of business!! This may not be such a bad idea after all.
DANIELLE
Danielle is at her friend, Danny's house. Danny is an ex-con who is on parole. John is Danny's thug friend and he's there, too. Danielle tells him about her rift with the Manzo's. John and Danny are both ex-felons. Danielle is just creating drama for herself. She asks Danny and John to escort her to the Brownstone event because she's afraid of something going down. Are you kidding? What are they going to do to Danielle at a charity event?? It's so ridiculous. She's so dramatic. They agree and Danielle tells us "When Danny takes my back, people better be listening." Get over yourself! Seriously??
DINA
Dina brings a GINORMOUS teddy bear for baby Audriana. She's super cute. She's got a knit cap with a huge flower on it. Teresa is in leopard print pajamas. Teresa asks Dina to be Audriana's godmother. Dina gets all emotional. It's so sweet.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Caroline that Danielle is coming to the Brownstone for the charity event. Caroline is skeptical about why Danielle is going. I am, too!!
See you next week!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 3
"Catty-Walk"
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and her son, CJ, decide to paint one of his white shirts. Normal people (even those with money) would get a white Hanes T-Shirt for their kid to paint. Not Jacqueline. She and her son are painting one of his white Polo shirts.
DANIELLE
Danielle is a bad mom. There, I said it. She and Jillian (her 11 year old) come home and find a bouquet of flowers with a card that says "Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl. Congratulations!" Rather than comment what a sweet gesture and what pretty flowers, Danielle asks HER DAUGHTER why she thinks Jacqueline sent them. Jillian says that Jacqueline probably sent them because she's proud of Christine. DUH! Danielle wants her daughter to talk shit with her so she asks if Jillian thinks that she sent them because she felt bad about missing the luncheon. Shut up, Danielle. Seriously. Why are you doing this to your CHILD? Leave her alone.
Danielle keeps going and asks Jillian if she should call Jacqueline. Jillian says she doesn't know and, by her look, she doesn't care, either. SHE'S 11! Then, Danielle decides to call and asks Jillian to hang out while she calls. Jillian says that she thinks her mom needs privacy and Danielle says no. WHY ARE YOU BRINGING YOUR KIDS INTO YOUR DRAMA?!?! Jacqueline ignores the call and Danielle leaves a message. THEN, she asks Jillian if she thinks Jacqueline is busy with the baby or just didn't want to pick up. Why would you ask your kid that? Jillian is smart and not insane like her mother so she says that Jacqueline is a normal person, so she's probably busy. Heh. "People are busy."
Danielle is diabolical. She bitches that Jacqueline didn't come to her luncheon and tells Jacqueline that she can tell Christine herself if she's proud of her. SO, Jacqueline sends Christine flowers to tell her how proud she is of her. AND NOW, Danielle bitches because she doesn't know why Jacqueline is sending flowers when she doesn't have a relationship with any of them. WTF? She is insane. I really think she needs a shrink. I'm pretty convinced that she's Borderline and/or Histrionic and for sure Narcissistic.
Then Danielle decides to call Jacqueline AGAIN. This time she says "I think maybe it would be a good idea if you step out of the room" to her daughter. Before she can get to "good idea," Jillian says "ok" and bolts out of there. HAHA. WHY is Danielle calling her AGAIN?? She just left a message. Jeez. Jacqueline ignores the call again and this is Danielle's message:
"Hi Jacqueline. It's Danielle. Um, I have to be quite honest with you. I really was under the impression that you were you're own woman. And I think it's really gonna affect us, going forward until, at least, you're able to perhaps maybe even celebrate my children with me. [WHAT?] And I need to know how we're going to move forward from this if this is always going to stand in the way. It's up to you. I've made the moves. I've reached out and, um, I'm going to leave the rest up to you now. Bye."
I don't even understand what she was saying.
DINA
Dina tells Teresa that Danielle invited her to the "luncheon" for Christine. Dina interviews that she told Danielle when she forgave her that she needed time before they could be friends so she just wants Danielle to back OFF! Teresa doesn't get why Danielle is still in the picture. I agree. Everyone hates her, yet, they all talk about her incessantly. MOVE ON people. Even Dina, who apparently "runs from drama" is confused about what to do about Danielle. It's easy, really. Stop answering her calls and texting with her. It's done...let it die, already.
PS - Dina's cats are creepy.
JACQUELINE
Caroline and Jacqueline are chatting outside and the conversation begins with...who else? Danielle. Ridiculous. Caroline listens to Jacqueline vent and then just asks Jacqueline if Danielle ever acknowledged Nicholas's birth. Card, text, flowers, congratulations, etc? Nope. Nada. Nothing. I'm with Caroline....why are you even thinking about Danielle? Caroline: "I'm not saying my way is the right way, but I don't get the phone calls." LOVE IT!
DANIELLE
Danielle continues on her crusade to take away Christine's moment. First, she tells Jillian to look at pictures of Christine because they are so beautiful. In the next breath, she tells Jillian that she's next because she looks JUST LIKE CHRISTINE. Christine doesn't like the comparison and is probably wondering when she can just be happy for herself instead of sharing her moment with her mom and her sister.
TERESA
I'm embarrassed for Teresa in this scene. Her kids are the most obnoxious, spoiled brats. She spends $2,000 on tacky clothes for Gia while her other kids whine and completely mess up the boutique. I don't want to know any of those kids as teenagers or adults. Teresa tells Gia that she needs to get a job to support her spending. Gia's response: "I'm too pretty to work." Sad.
DINA
Dina confuses me. I think she's pretty and always well put together when she goes out. She seems like the most "normal" of all the Jersey ladies. But her house is completely crowded with tacky, gawdy furniture and decorations. And she's got those weird cats and she has a bird AND NOW she's meeting with an "energist"? WTF? Again, the conversation is centered around Danielle. OY! Dina wants to eliminate all the drama and basically, eliminate Danielle from her life, but she feels mean doing that. The "energist" tells Dina that she needs to tell Danielle to her face that she's done.
DANIELLE
Danielle's dog is disgusting. It's wiping it's ass on the carpet. GROSS. Her realtor, Karin, shows up and Danielle wants to know if she asked Danielle's ex to pay to fix up the house. Karin talks and talks, but bottom line: He's not paying for anything. Danielle whines that her ex hasn't paid for any upkeep on the house, but is insisting she sell the house so he can have his half. Well, that's the way it works. You're divorced. Why should he pay for the upkeep on the house he's not living in?? (Although, it might help get a better sale in the end, but whatever.) Teresa interviews that Danielle should get a job. I agree. I think all those women should get a job! Too much entitlement.
Danielle interviews that her home is worth $2M, but she'll probably only get $1.5M for it. That means her ex will get about $750K from the sale and she'll get "well under $1M. Nice way to treat a person." Are you F-ing kidding me??? I WISH someone would give me $750K so I can buy a house. She's delusional. This is what I'm talking about. ENTITLED. GET A JOB. Danielle decides to take her house off the market until her ex is willing to "fulfill his obligations" and fix up the house. [insert eye roll here]
CAROLINE
Caroline and Albie go to Teresa's house for dinner and to celebrate Gia's upcoming cat walk debut. Teresa says that she and Joe are "old school" but in a cute way. Meaning, he treats her like a 1950's housewife and he acts like the sexist, macho Italian. Yeah, so cute. Wow. Those girls are OUT OF CONTROL. I can't believe they were eating dinner at 8pm.
FASHION WEEK!!
So, Joe is the type of father who likes to tease his kids. But sometimes the teasing is just mean. My dad can be the same way. If you are a really sensitive person, it's hard to be around guys like that. But, if you have a good sense of self and sense of humor, it doesn't bug you. Joe tells Gia that she's going to walk down the "ugly runway" because she's so ugly. Ok, that's just mean. It's a little beyond just teasing. Teresa's response: "Gia is very sensitive." Yeah, that's the problem. Jeez. Teresa and Joe can't figure out why Gia is crying. Gia says "Dad is mean." Teresa: "Ok, Gia stop." Really? Your husband just called your daughter ugly, her feelings are hurt and all you have say is "Gia stop"? Who is this woman? Gia and Teresa get out of the car and Teresa tells her that her dad was just kidding. Terrible.
DANIELLE
Danielle, Christine and Jillian arrive at IMG to meet with Christine's agent and a walking coach, Mac Folkes. Well, what do you know, Christine is a normal 15 year old. She doesn't really care about doing the perfect "walk," but she tries. Danielle is shouting out critiques which is dumb because Danielle is NO MODEL. She looks like she's next in line to be the cat lady. Christine finally gets annoyed and decides she's done practicing.
DINA
OMG. I just lost a little respect for Dina. Her energist decides to do some "smudging" with her before she leaves. "Smudging" is when you burn dry sage to get rid of the negative energy. The reason I've lost a little respect for Dina is because my boyfriend's ex wife did this when they got divorced and he moved out. And I think his ex wife is a total nut job!! She's all about being vegan and spiritual, but drives an SUV and refuses to work and expects men to take care of her. She's a walking contradiction. So this "smudging" thing is a little ridiculous to me.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters show up. I'm surprised Christine's dad isn't there. Danielle interviews that she has no concerns about Christine's eating habits now that she's a model. Cut to Christine getting "food" because she's "SO hungry" and comes back with two small slices of melon. Really? Not even a little concerned, Danielle?
TERESA
Caroline and Jacqueline come backstage to say hi to Gia and Teresa. Teresa is in a sexy dress and three inch heels and NINE MONTHS PREGNANT. Wow. Teresa sees that Christine is on the cover of the Daily and she shows Gia and says how pretty Christine is. Danielle interviews that she doesn't think Teresa is genuinely happy for Christine. Why not?? Teresa hates you, Danielle. She has nothing against your daughter. And, from what I've seen, Christine and Jillian are already twice the woman Danielle will ever be.
Out comes Gia and she looks so cute. Jacqueline, Teresa and Caroline are squealing and clapping in the front row. It's super exciting. Gia does a great job. Even Joe tells her how beautiful she is. Ahhh. Gag.
Up next...the REBECCA MINKOFF SHOW
Christine is 5'10" and walking in "6-inch heels." I think they're actually 4-inch heels, which are not that bad. I have plenty of shoes that high and they aren't hard to walk in. As Christine comes down the runway, Danielle interviews that Christine will be a supermodel and travel all over the world "with me by her side." It's always about Danielle. Can't you just be happy for Christine and let her enjoy it...WITHOUT YOU RIDING HER COATTAILS??
Danielle is talking to EVERYONE and bragging about Christine. Meanwhile, Christine and the other models are all posing on the runway for photographers for about 25 minutes after the show and Christine tells the model next to her that she doesn't feel good. Well, I'm not surprised. She only ate two little slices of melon! Christine tells people she doesn't feel good and that she's going to "barf." She starts gagging. Someone pulls her off the stage. She sits in the back and gets some water. She's totally sweating and Danielle gets back there and figures out that Christine didn't eat anything. Her agent tells her that this happens sometimes and Christine is relieved that she isn't the only one who almost fainted.
All in all, the two girls did a great job.
See you next week!
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and her son, CJ, decide to paint one of his white shirts. Normal people (even those with money) would get a white Hanes T-Shirt for their kid to paint. Not Jacqueline. She and her son are painting one of his white Polo shirts.
DANIELLE
Danielle is a bad mom. There, I said it. She and Jillian (her 11 year old) come home and find a bouquet of flowers with a card that says "Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl. Congratulations!" Rather than comment what a sweet gesture and what pretty flowers, Danielle asks HER DAUGHTER why she thinks Jacqueline sent them. Jillian says that Jacqueline probably sent them because she's proud of Christine. DUH! Danielle wants her daughter to talk shit with her so she asks if Jillian thinks that she sent them because she felt bad about missing the luncheon. Shut up, Danielle. Seriously. Why are you doing this to your CHILD? Leave her alone.
Danielle keeps going and asks Jillian if she should call Jacqueline. Jillian says she doesn't know and, by her look, she doesn't care, either. SHE'S 11! Then, Danielle decides to call and asks Jillian to hang out while she calls. Jillian says that she thinks her mom needs privacy and Danielle says no. WHY ARE YOU BRINGING YOUR KIDS INTO YOUR DRAMA?!?! Jacqueline ignores the call and Danielle leaves a message. THEN, she asks Jillian if she thinks Jacqueline is busy with the baby or just didn't want to pick up. Why would you ask your kid that? Jillian is smart and not insane like her mother so she says that Jacqueline is a normal person, so she's probably busy. Heh. "People are busy."
Danielle is diabolical. She bitches that Jacqueline didn't come to her luncheon and tells Jacqueline that she can tell Christine herself if she's proud of her. SO, Jacqueline sends Christine flowers to tell her how proud she is of her. AND NOW, Danielle bitches because she doesn't know why Jacqueline is sending flowers when she doesn't have a relationship with any of them. WTF? She is insane. I really think she needs a shrink. I'm pretty convinced that she's Borderline and/or Histrionic and for sure Narcissistic.
Then Danielle decides to call Jacqueline AGAIN. This time she says "I think maybe it would be a good idea if you step out of the room" to her daughter. Before she can get to "good idea," Jillian says "ok" and bolts out of there. HAHA. WHY is Danielle calling her AGAIN?? She just left a message. Jeez. Jacqueline ignores the call again and this is Danielle's message:
"Hi Jacqueline. It's Danielle. Um, I have to be quite honest with you. I really was under the impression that you were you're own woman. And I think it's really gonna affect us, going forward until, at least, you're able to perhaps maybe even celebrate my children with me. [WHAT?] And I need to know how we're going to move forward from this if this is always going to stand in the way. It's up to you. I've made the moves. I've reached out and, um, I'm going to leave the rest up to you now. Bye."
I don't even understand what she was saying.
DINA
Dina tells Teresa that Danielle invited her to the "luncheon" for Christine. Dina interviews that she told Danielle when she forgave her that she needed time before they could be friends so she just wants Danielle to back OFF! Teresa doesn't get why Danielle is still in the picture. I agree. Everyone hates her, yet, they all talk about her incessantly. MOVE ON people. Even Dina, who apparently "runs from drama" is confused about what to do about Danielle. It's easy, really. Stop answering her calls and texting with her. It's done...let it die, already.
PS - Dina's cats are creepy.
JACQUELINE
Caroline and Jacqueline are chatting outside and the conversation begins with...who else? Danielle. Ridiculous. Caroline listens to Jacqueline vent and then just asks Jacqueline if Danielle ever acknowledged Nicholas's birth. Card, text, flowers, congratulations, etc? Nope. Nada. Nothing. I'm with Caroline....why are you even thinking about Danielle? Caroline: "I'm not saying my way is the right way, but I don't get the phone calls." LOVE IT!
DANIELLE
Danielle continues on her crusade to take away Christine's moment. First, she tells Jillian to look at pictures of Christine because they are so beautiful. In the next breath, she tells Jillian that she's next because she looks JUST LIKE CHRISTINE. Christine doesn't like the comparison and is probably wondering when she can just be happy for herself instead of sharing her moment with her mom and her sister.
TERESA
I'm embarrassed for Teresa in this scene. Her kids are the most obnoxious, spoiled brats. She spends $2,000 on tacky clothes for Gia while her other kids whine and completely mess up the boutique. I don't want to know any of those kids as teenagers or adults. Teresa tells Gia that she needs to get a job to support her spending. Gia's response: "I'm too pretty to work." Sad.
DINA
Dina confuses me. I think she's pretty and always well put together when she goes out. She seems like the most "normal" of all the Jersey ladies. But her house is completely crowded with tacky, gawdy furniture and decorations. And she's got those weird cats and she has a bird AND NOW she's meeting with an "energist"? WTF? Again, the conversation is centered around Danielle. OY! Dina wants to eliminate all the drama and basically, eliminate Danielle from her life, but she feels mean doing that. The "energist" tells Dina that she needs to tell Danielle to her face that she's done.
DANIELLE
Danielle's dog is disgusting. It's wiping it's ass on the carpet. GROSS. Her realtor, Karin, shows up and Danielle wants to know if she asked Danielle's ex to pay to fix up the house. Karin talks and talks, but bottom line: He's not paying for anything. Danielle whines that her ex hasn't paid for any upkeep on the house, but is insisting she sell the house so he can have his half. Well, that's the way it works. You're divorced. Why should he pay for the upkeep on the house he's not living in?? (Although, it might help get a better sale in the end, but whatever.) Teresa interviews that Danielle should get a job. I agree. I think all those women should get a job! Too much entitlement.
Danielle interviews that her home is worth $2M, but she'll probably only get $1.5M for it. That means her ex will get about $750K from the sale and she'll get "well under $1M. Nice way to treat a person." Are you F-ing kidding me??? I WISH someone would give me $750K so I can buy a house. She's delusional. This is what I'm talking about. ENTITLED. GET A JOB. Danielle decides to take her house off the market until her ex is willing to "fulfill his obligations" and fix up the house. [insert eye roll here]
CAROLINE
Caroline and Albie go to Teresa's house for dinner and to celebrate Gia's upcoming cat walk debut. Teresa says that she and Joe are "old school" but in a cute way. Meaning, he treats her like a 1950's housewife and he acts like the sexist, macho Italian. Yeah, so cute. Wow. Those girls are OUT OF CONTROL. I can't believe they were eating dinner at 8pm.
FASHION WEEK!!
So, Joe is the type of father who likes to tease his kids. But sometimes the teasing is just mean. My dad can be the same way. If you are a really sensitive person, it's hard to be around guys like that. But, if you have a good sense of self and sense of humor, it doesn't bug you. Joe tells Gia that she's going to walk down the "ugly runway" because she's so ugly. Ok, that's just mean. It's a little beyond just teasing. Teresa's response: "Gia is very sensitive." Yeah, that's the problem. Jeez. Teresa and Joe can't figure out why Gia is crying. Gia says "Dad is mean." Teresa: "Ok, Gia stop." Really? Your husband just called your daughter ugly, her feelings are hurt and all you have say is "Gia stop"? Who is this woman? Gia and Teresa get out of the car and Teresa tells her that her dad was just kidding. Terrible.
DANIELLE
Danielle, Christine and Jillian arrive at IMG to meet with Christine's agent and a walking coach, Mac Folkes. Well, what do you know, Christine is a normal 15 year old. She doesn't really care about doing the perfect "walk," but she tries. Danielle is shouting out critiques which is dumb because Danielle is NO MODEL. She looks like she's next in line to be the cat lady. Christine finally gets annoyed and decides she's done practicing.
DINA
OMG. I just lost a little respect for Dina. Her energist decides to do some "smudging" with her before she leaves. "Smudging" is when you burn dry sage to get rid of the negative energy. The reason I've lost a little respect for Dina is because my boyfriend's ex wife did this when they got divorced and he moved out. And I think his ex wife is a total nut job!! She's all about being vegan and spiritual, but drives an SUV and refuses to work and expects men to take care of her. She's a walking contradiction. So this "smudging" thing is a little ridiculous to me.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters show up. I'm surprised Christine's dad isn't there. Danielle interviews that she has no concerns about Christine's eating habits now that she's a model. Cut to Christine getting "food" because she's "SO hungry" and comes back with two small slices of melon. Really? Not even a little concerned, Danielle?
TERESA
Caroline and Jacqueline come backstage to say hi to Gia and Teresa. Teresa is in a sexy dress and three inch heels and NINE MONTHS PREGNANT. Wow. Teresa sees that Christine is on the cover of the Daily and she shows Gia and says how pretty Christine is. Danielle interviews that she doesn't think Teresa is genuinely happy for Christine. Why not?? Teresa hates you, Danielle. She has nothing against your daughter. And, from what I've seen, Christine and Jillian are already twice the woman Danielle will ever be.
Out comes Gia and she looks so cute. Jacqueline, Teresa and Caroline are squealing and clapping in the front row. It's super exciting. Gia does a great job. Even Joe tells her how beautiful she is. Ahhh. Gag.
Up next...the REBECCA MINKOFF SHOW
Christine is 5'10" and walking in "6-inch heels." I think they're actually 4-inch heels, which are not that bad. I have plenty of shoes that high and they aren't hard to walk in. As Christine comes down the runway, Danielle interviews that Christine will be a supermodel and travel all over the world "with me by her side." It's always about Danielle. Can't you just be happy for Christine and let her enjoy it...WITHOUT YOU RIDING HER COATTAILS??
Danielle is talking to EVERYONE and bragging about Christine. Meanwhile, Christine and the other models are all posing on the runway for photographers for about 25 minutes after the show and Christine tells the model next to her that she doesn't feel good. Well, I'm not surprised. She only ate two little slices of melon! Christine tells people she doesn't feel good and that she's going to "barf." She starts gagging. Someone pulls her off the stage. She sits in the back and gets some water. She's totally sweating and Danielle gets back there and figures out that Christine didn't eat anything. Her agent tells her that this happens sometimes and Christine is relieved that she isn't the only one who almost fainted.
All in all, the two girls did a great job.
See you next week!
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 2
"Generation Vexed"
DANIELLE
Karin, Danielle's realtor, comes over to see her. Danielle informs us that she needs to sell her house and give half the proceeds to her ex-husband. Karin is walking around all the rooms to see what Danielle needs to fix up before they show the house. It's a mess. It totally looks like it's falling apart on the inside. Danielle doesn't have "time" to fix it all up before it gets shown. Really? Why? What is it that you do?
Danielle starts crying that she needs to get out of the house but doesn't want to put money that she doesn't have into it to fix it up. She asks Karin to talk to her ex about fixing it up. Dina interviews that she feels bad for Danielle, in particular, her children.
TERESA
Jacqueline and Caroline are waiting for Teresa to show up for their lunch date, but she's running late as usual. She finally shows up and looks fantastic. She starts talking about her husband bugging her to have sex. Gross. Teresa changes the subject and asks Jacqueline if she's seen or talked to Danielle. Jacqueline feels uncomfortable talking about Danielle. Caroline says that Danielle's kids are socially awkward. Jacqueline tells Caroline that she's crossed the line and she needs to keep Danielle's kids out of everything.
Teresa talks about the court documents that state Danielle kidnapped a kid for ransom and was caught with 10 kilos of cocaine. OMG. Are we still stuck on her past??? Seriously. It happened 20+ years ago. MOVE ON, PEOPLE. Yes, I still think Danielle is crazy and I would not be friends with her, but leave her alone already. Jeez. We get it, she's done bad shit. Jacqueline says that it was many, many years ago. Caroline says that she KIDNAPPED someone many years ago. People don't do that. Well, I see her point. Caroline says tells Jacqueline she is the weakest link and that's why Danielle contacts her.
CAROLINE
The three kids have a food fight in the kitchen. Caroline comes in and says "No more ham game!" Haha. They all start talking about Lauren and Vito (Albie's best friend). Albie says that it's weird that his best friend is dating his sister. Caroline tells us that they need to work it out.
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes over and brings her laundry with her. Ashley is 18 and tells Jacqueline that she goes out to clubs and drinks. Why are you telling your mom this? Not ok. Especially Jacqueline. She's a total worrier. As Jacqueline talks to her, Ashley gets up and gets her cell phone. They start arguing because Jacqueline wants to make sure she's being safe. Ashley tells her mom that if she wanted to argue with her, she would just live at home. So, Jacqueline says "Ok, bye. And take your laundry with you. " HA.
DANIELLE
Danielle tells her daughter, Christine, that IMG Models wants her to model for them. Danielle is super excited for her. Caroline has a point...Christine is a little socially awkward. She's still adorable and a good kid given her mom's craziness.
DINA
Dina meets Jacqueline at a baby store. They don't know if Teresa is having a boy or a girl. So they are trying to figure out what to get her for the baby. Jacqueline tells Dina that Ashley moved out. Jacqueline vents that Ashley doesn't want to hear anything she has to say. It's just hard to communicate with her right now. Dina asks if she ever considered kicking her ass. HAHA. They laugh, but I think Dina is serious.
TERESA
Teresa brings Gia to a try-out for fashion week at THINKPR. The fashion show is for ELLE Magazine. The publicist asks her if she's ever heard of Elle and she says no. Then she has Gia get up to "walk." She asks if Gia will be ok walking in front of a lot of people. Gia says that she's been in pageants in front of 300-400 people so she's fine with it. Gia looks a little "rough" and her scratchy voice doesn't help. She doesn't really have a soft or graceful look about her. She does her catwalk and it's good. Danielle interviews that Gia is "not a supermodel." Well, she's right.
DANIELLE
Christine is at her photo shoot with Gilles Bensimon (HAHA! Kelly's ex! When worlds collide. Wow, he's OLD!). Danielle calls him GOD. Oh jeez. Christine is up for the cover of "the Daily" which in the fashion world is the bible...according to Danielle. Christine is a little uncomfortable with her mom being there the whole time. Danielle keeps saying that her daughter is "smoking hot" and "gorgeous" and "she looks like a Barbie doll." Gilles Bensimon tells Danielle that he wants to take her photo and I think Christine feels that her mom is taking away her moment.
CAROLINE
Greg, Albie's friend, is over at the house with Albie. Vito and Lauren walk in and Albie is trying to take the high road. Albie is not ok with it. He tells Vito and Greg to go with him in the kitchen so they can talk about it. Albie says that it's a little weird and that it's the first rule of friendship. He's afraid of what happens if they break up. Albie says that he doesn't want to see anything and Vito tells him that he has respect, so no worries.
DANIELLE
Danielle is with Christine at IMG Models meeting Ivan Bart who is Christine's agent. Christine is on the COVER of "the Daily." Danielle is going to ride her daughter's coat tails with this one. Ivan wants her to do a show at Fashion Week. He gives Danielle props for being there with her daughter. Where the hell else is she going to be??? She has nothing else to do so, of course, she's going to follow Christine wherever she goes. Um, what about your OTHER daughter, Jillian?? Are you going to drag her along, too?
JACQUELINE
The ladies are talking to Teresa and trying to guess what she's going to have. Nicholas has the funniest look on his face. HAHA. Teresa is talking about her "area" looking bad while she's giving birth. I would think that what you look like down there is the least of your worries when you're giving birth.
DANIELLE
She wants to have a celebratory luncheon in Christine's honor for getting the cover of "the Daily." Wow. Danielle is not wasting any time spending whatever Christine earned for that cover, is she? Christine says that she doesn't want Caroline there and Danielle agrees. Danielle thinks she wants to invite Dina and Jacqueline. Christine just doesn't want drama. Jillian asks if any of Christine's friends are coming and Danielle says that it's not really Christine's party. It's more of a party for Danielle to show off her pride for her daughter. Christine: "Then invite whoever you want." Seriously. Why are you even asking her if it's your thing? Dumb.
Danielle calls Dina to invite her to "the luncheon for Danielle to show off her daughter." Dina says that she may have an obligation, but she'll get back to Danielle. Next up is Jacqueline. She tells Danielle that she's happy for her and really happy for Christine and she would love to be there to support Danielle ... but it's just awkward with her husband right now and she doesn't think it's a good idea. Danielle says she respects that and just wanted to extend the invitation. Then, Danielle interviews that she was disappointed in Jacqueline's response. When Jacqueline tells Danielle to tell Christine that she's proud of her, Danielle tells Jacqueline to tell her herself. Way to "respect" her decision, Danielle. Caroline interviews that she doesn't understand why Dina and Jacqueline have a "gray" area with Danielle when neither of them want to be friends with her. She says that Danielle didn't invite Caroline to her luncheon because she didn't want Caroline to be there and Caroline didn't want to be there.
TERESA
Gia gets the show at Fashion Week!! She tells Joe about the modeling gig and he could NOT be less interested. He's chopping garlic and making noise as Teresa is trying to tell him about it. HAHA. Teresa tells Gia and she SCREAMS! Oy.
DANIELLE
Danielle arrives at her luncheon to "honor Christine." All of Danielle's friends start to arrive, including Kim "D" (who you will remember denied being her friend at Caroline's party). Danielle thanks everyone for coming and gives everyone a copy of the magazine which includes the picture she took with Christine. UGH. Christine interviews that Danielle's luncheon was not for Christine. It was so that Danielle could show off and brag to her friends. Exactly. Sad.
Danielle announces to her 12 or so friends that the two empty chairs were for Jacqueline and Dina who decided not to show up and support her. Awkward. Dina interviews that she doesn't understand why she had a chair for her because she told her ahead of time that she was not going to be there. So did Jacqueline. Drama!! I'm with Jacqueline's husband...cut the drama out of your life. Danielle tells everyone that Jacqueline's husband prefers that she not attend gatherings if Danielle will be there. WHY?? Why would you tells everyone these details?? Seriously? It just makes you look crazier. OMG. Stop talking about it.
Danielle tells another Kim that she was made painfully aware that she and Caroline were friends. Kim tells her that her son is friends with Caroline's son, Chris, but she and Caroline are not friends. This is not Kim "D" by the way. Danielle tells her that she just doesn't want to make her feel like she's in the middle. I'm embarrassed for Danielle. Danielle says that she keeps all of her friends very close to her. Wait until she sees the footage of Kim "D" trashing her.
See you next week.
DANIELLE
Karin, Danielle's realtor, comes over to see her. Danielle informs us that she needs to sell her house and give half the proceeds to her ex-husband. Karin is walking around all the rooms to see what Danielle needs to fix up before they show the house. It's a mess. It totally looks like it's falling apart on the inside. Danielle doesn't have "time" to fix it all up before it gets shown. Really? Why? What is it that you do?
Danielle starts crying that she needs to get out of the house but doesn't want to put money that she doesn't have into it to fix it up. She asks Karin to talk to her ex about fixing it up. Dina interviews that she feels bad for Danielle, in particular, her children.
TERESA
Jacqueline and Caroline are waiting for Teresa to show up for their lunch date, but she's running late as usual. She finally shows up and looks fantastic. She starts talking about her husband bugging her to have sex. Gross. Teresa changes the subject and asks Jacqueline if she's seen or talked to Danielle. Jacqueline feels uncomfortable talking about Danielle. Caroline says that Danielle's kids are socially awkward. Jacqueline tells Caroline that she's crossed the line and she needs to keep Danielle's kids out of everything.
Teresa talks about the court documents that state Danielle kidnapped a kid for ransom and was caught with 10 kilos of cocaine. OMG. Are we still stuck on her past??? Seriously. It happened 20+ years ago. MOVE ON, PEOPLE. Yes, I still think Danielle is crazy and I would not be friends with her, but leave her alone already. Jeez. We get it, she's done bad shit. Jacqueline says that it was many, many years ago. Caroline says that she KIDNAPPED someone many years ago. People don't do that. Well, I see her point. Caroline says tells Jacqueline she is the weakest link and that's why Danielle contacts her.
CAROLINE
The three kids have a food fight in the kitchen. Caroline comes in and says "No more ham game!" Haha. They all start talking about Lauren and Vito (Albie's best friend). Albie says that it's weird that his best friend is dating his sister. Caroline tells us that they need to work it out.
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes over and brings her laundry with her. Ashley is 18 and tells Jacqueline that she goes out to clubs and drinks. Why are you telling your mom this? Not ok. Especially Jacqueline. She's a total worrier. As Jacqueline talks to her, Ashley gets up and gets her cell phone. They start arguing because Jacqueline wants to make sure she's being safe. Ashley tells her mom that if she wanted to argue with her, she would just live at home. So, Jacqueline says "Ok, bye. And take your laundry with you. " HA.
DANIELLE
Danielle tells her daughter, Christine, that IMG Models wants her to model for them. Danielle is super excited for her. Caroline has a point...Christine is a little socially awkward. She's still adorable and a good kid given her mom's craziness.
DINA
Dina meets Jacqueline at a baby store. They don't know if Teresa is having a boy or a girl. So they are trying to figure out what to get her for the baby. Jacqueline tells Dina that Ashley moved out. Jacqueline vents that Ashley doesn't want to hear anything she has to say. It's just hard to communicate with her right now. Dina asks if she ever considered kicking her ass. HAHA. They laugh, but I think Dina is serious.
TERESA
Teresa brings Gia to a try-out for fashion week at THINKPR. The fashion show is for ELLE Magazine. The publicist asks her if she's ever heard of Elle and she says no. Then she has Gia get up to "walk." She asks if Gia will be ok walking in front of a lot of people. Gia says that she's been in pageants in front of 300-400 people so she's fine with it. Gia looks a little "rough" and her scratchy voice doesn't help. She doesn't really have a soft or graceful look about her. She does her catwalk and it's good. Danielle interviews that Gia is "not a supermodel." Well, she's right.
DANIELLE
Christine is at her photo shoot with Gilles Bensimon (HAHA! Kelly's ex! When worlds collide. Wow, he's OLD!). Danielle calls him GOD. Oh jeez. Christine is up for the cover of "the Daily" which in the fashion world is the bible...according to Danielle. Christine is a little uncomfortable with her mom being there the whole time. Danielle keeps saying that her daughter is "smoking hot" and "gorgeous" and "she looks like a Barbie doll." Gilles Bensimon tells Danielle that he wants to take her photo and I think Christine feels that her mom is taking away her moment.
CAROLINE
Greg, Albie's friend, is over at the house with Albie. Vito and Lauren walk in and Albie is trying to take the high road. Albie is not ok with it. He tells Vito and Greg to go with him in the kitchen so they can talk about it. Albie says that it's a little weird and that it's the first rule of friendship. He's afraid of what happens if they break up. Albie says that he doesn't want to see anything and Vito tells him that he has respect, so no worries.
DANIELLE
Danielle is with Christine at IMG Models meeting Ivan Bart who is Christine's agent. Christine is on the COVER of "the Daily." Danielle is going to ride her daughter's coat tails with this one. Ivan wants her to do a show at Fashion Week. He gives Danielle props for being there with her daughter. Where the hell else is she going to be??? She has nothing else to do so, of course, she's going to follow Christine wherever she goes. Um, what about your OTHER daughter, Jillian?? Are you going to drag her along, too?
JACQUELINE
The ladies are talking to Teresa and trying to guess what she's going to have. Nicholas has the funniest look on his face. HAHA. Teresa is talking about her "area" looking bad while she's giving birth. I would think that what you look like down there is the least of your worries when you're giving birth.
DANIELLE
She wants to have a celebratory luncheon in Christine's honor for getting the cover of "the Daily." Wow. Danielle is not wasting any time spending whatever Christine earned for that cover, is she? Christine says that she doesn't want Caroline there and Danielle agrees. Danielle thinks she wants to invite Dina and Jacqueline. Christine just doesn't want drama. Jillian asks if any of Christine's friends are coming and Danielle says that it's not really Christine's party. It's more of a party for Danielle to show off her pride for her daughter. Christine: "Then invite whoever you want." Seriously. Why are you even asking her if it's your thing? Dumb.
Danielle calls Dina to invite her to "the luncheon for Danielle to show off her daughter." Dina says that she may have an obligation, but she'll get back to Danielle. Next up is Jacqueline. She tells Danielle that she's happy for her and really happy for Christine and she would love to be there to support Danielle ... but it's just awkward with her husband right now and she doesn't think it's a good idea. Danielle says she respects that and just wanted to extend the invitation. Then, Danielle interviews that she was disappointed in Jacqueline's response. When Jacqueline tells Danielle to tell Christine that she's proud of her, Danielle tells Jacqueline to tell her herself. Way to "respect" her decision, Danielle. Caroline interviews that she doesn't understand why Dina and Jacqueline have a "gray" area with Danielle when neither of them want to be friends with her. She says that Danielle didn't invite Caroline to her luncheon because she didn't want Caroline to be there and Caroline didn't want to be there.
TERESA
Gia gets the show at Fashion Week!! She tells Joe about the modeling gig and he could NOT be less interested. He's chopping garlic and making noise as Teresa is trying to tell him about it. HAHA. Teresa tells Gia and she SCREAMS! Oy.
DANIELLE
Danielle arrives at her luncheon to "honor Christine." All of Danielle's friends start to arrive, including Kim "D" (who you will remember denied being her friend at Caroline's party). Danielle thanks everyone for coming and gives everyone a copy of the magazine which includes the picture she took with Christine. UGH. Christine interviews that Danielle's luncheon was not for Christine. It was so that Danielle could show off and brag to her friends. Exactly. Sad.
Danielle announces to her 12 or so friends that the two empty chairs were for Jacqueline and Dina who decided not to show up and support her. Awkward. Dina interviews that she doesn't understand why she had a chair for her because she told her ahead of time that she was not going to be there. So did Jacqueline. Drama!! I'm with Jacqueline's husband...cut the drama out of your life. Danielle tells everyone that Jacqueline's husband prefers that she not attend gatherings if Danielle will be there. WHY?? Why would you tells everyone these details?? Seriously? It just makes you look crazier. OMG. Stop talking about it.
Danielle tells another Kim that she was made painfully aware that she and Caroline were friends. Kim tells her that her son is friends with Caroline's son, Chris, but she and Caroline are not friends. This is not Kim "D" by the way. Danielle tells her that she just doesn't want to make her feel like she's in the middle. I'm embarrassed for Danielle. Danielle says that she keeps all of her friends very close to her. Wait until she sees the footage of Kim "D" trashing her.
See you next week.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 1
"Water Under the Table"
JACQUELINE
The first footage of Jacqueline and her hubby is from her own home video of her going to the hospital to give birth to her second son. Last season she told us she had 4 miscarriages in a row, but after the show ended we learned that she was pregnant. She had a baby boy, Nicholas, and he weighed exactly what I did: 8lbs. 8oz. She has such a cute family!! OMG. The baby is SO CUTE. Caroline is there and tells us that she and Jacqueline are much closer now that they are drama-free.
DINA
Dina still has that disgusting hairless cat, Grandma Wrinkles. OMG. There's a new one: Ladybug. She's white and most of her body is shaved except for her paws and her head and the tip of her tail! Dear LORD. She's trying to surround herself with positive energy. She is willing to give Danielle a second chance since Danielle is broken and troubled. Zing!
DANIELLE
Danielle has found GOD. She meets with Father Richard. Although, on the way to church, she says that God better help all those who have done her wrong. Nice. Oh, I get it. She's playing the victim with Father Richard. She tells him that these women dug up her past to humiliate her and make her feel bad for things for which she has already paid. She's very defensive and says that she KNOWS she's not all the things they called her. Father Richard correctly asks her why she cares what other people are saying about her. She says she doesn't care - LIAR. Her purpose for seeing Father Richard is that she doesn't want these women in her life anymore and wants to know how to pray for them. WTF? Seriously?
When the hell did Danielle become a "devout Catholic?" In jail? Father Richard says that she may not forget, but she needs to forgive so that she can move on with her life. A-MEN!
TERESA
Teresa, her mother and her girls are making red sauce. They're washing the tomatoes and she tells them to make sure they get rid of any rott-EN parts. They are making about 180 jars of tomato sauce to last them the year! Teresa wants to pass this tradition onto her kids. Very cute. Her dad is adorable. Teresa is due in two weeks, so she trying not to over-exert herself. She tells us that Jacqueline, Dina and Caroline are very excited for the new baby because "unlike Danielle, I have friends." Wow.
OMG. Teresa's friend is there helping them make red sauce and Teresa asks her if it's "her time of the month." Weird. Apparently, old school Italians believe that you cannot make red sauce when you are menstruating because "they say" that you can spoil the tomatoes. Random. Luckily, she's not.
Joe's mom is helping out, too. She tells Gia that she has to marry an Italian man. Gia says that her mom tells her not to and that she should marry a Jewish guy. Teresa explains that Jewish men cater to their wives. Gia whines that she doesn't want to marry a Jewish guy because they make you wear your hair all weird. I'm guessing she's talking about the Orthodox Jews with the curly sideburns. Teresa tells her not to say that. Joe tells Gia that she's 8 years old and doesn't have to worry about getting married. HA.
CAROLINE
Albert and Caroline are at Barneys buying a new suit for Albert. He's lost 70 lbs in the last year and he looks and feels great. He had a health scare and basically was told that he would have a heart attack soon. So he lost a ton of weight and looks great. Al comes out modeling a new suit and Caroline is gushing over how great he looks and starts to get a little teary. Al asks her if she's on crack. Oh, Al, you're so modest. Jacqueline spills the beans. Apparently Al had a little "help" losing all that weight. Something about a "rubber band." Interesting. I think it's a surgical procedure but not quite as dangerous as gastric bypass. Although, I could be wrong. Maybe it IS gastric bypass. HOLY CRAP!! The ONE suit, shirt, tie combo will cost $8,000 - $9,000.
JACQUELINE
Chris, her husband, sits with her and tells her he wants to talk to her about Danielle. He says that he doesn't know her well and ... he doesn't want to know her well. I actually think he's sincere during this conversation. He is a reasonable person and tells Jacqueline that every time Danielle is around there is drama and he doesn't want the drama or the bullshit in his life. He tells her that Danielle is NOT welcome in their house. And, he points out that Danielle is not even Jacqueline's "friend" - she didn't call, text, send flowers or a card, nothing when little Nicholas was born. I get that. Jacqueline says she's not going to just cut her out of her life just because he says so. I understand, but why would you even want Danielle in your life?? Chris is totally giving her an "out". She can just tell Danielle that her husband doesn't want her hanging out with Danielle. Danielle may think she's weak for doing what her husband wants, but who cares what Danielle thinks??
TERESA
It's Milania's first day of school. She and Gabriella are going to the same school and Gabriella does not look pleased. OK. I just need to comment on the amount of crap Teresa has in her pantry. Seriously. Milania is "packing" herself a snack and she's pulling chips, ho-ho's, cupcakes, etc. from boxes in the pantry. Teresa has a CRAPLOAD of money at her disposal and can afford to get healthy snacks for her kids and yet, she buys junk food? Gia is never going to be a "model" with that kind of diet. Gross. Teresa tells us that she doesn't have a nanny, so she does everything. Three kids is a lot to deal with on your own. However, she makes her life more complicated than it needs to be. She's so consumed with the superficial aspect, that she completely disregards her kids' health. There's no need to BLOW DRY your 5 year old's hair. C'mon! She's also making sure they have their "purses". Really?
OMG. They are little whining nightmares. I would not be able to deal with those girls.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to see her friend, Kim "D," who owns Posche boutique to look for clothes for Jillian and Christine - her daughters. Um, Christine is 15 now and looks really skinny. I hope all this reality drama hasn't caused an eating disorder. I worry about Danielle's kids - the crazy will eventually affect them. Danielle sits down to talk to Kim "D" in front of her kids. She tells Kim that she tried to reach out to Jacqueline and she told her Chris wasn't comfortable with their friendship. Kim tells her to take the high road. I think it's funny because Danielle says that friends show up with pasta when their friend is in the hospital - or their friend's mom is in the hospital. Where was Jacqueline's pasta when she gave birth?
JACQUELINE
Ashley is 18 now and visiting her mom with her new boyfriend, Derek (23). They bring his dog, which Jacqueline is not happy about. Chris doesn't like dogs in the house - neither does Lisa, by the way. So they put the dog in the bathroom and come into the kitchen. Jacqueline tells us that Ashley didn't like the rules, so she moved out. BUT she graduated from high school, so YAY!!!
Jacqueline wants to know what Ashley's plans are. Ashley tells her that she's taking a semester off. I love Chris. He says "what are you taking a break FROM?" HAHA. Then he asks why the dog is at the house. Ashley says that she didn't know where to leave it. Chris tells her that it's Derek's dog, so he can leave it at his house. I really love Chris. He's a man after my own heart. He tells Ashley she needs to learn some responsibility and pay her own bills and get a checking account. Ashley says she would love to get a checking account, but she doesn't know how. OMG. Lazy. They need to cut her off so she knows what it means to actually earn money.
Jacqueline is not comfortable with Ashley's relationship with Derek and asks her if they are being safe. Then she mortifies Ashley by asking if she's on birth control. Really, Jacqueline? This isn't a conversation you could have had with your daughter ALONE? You had to have it in front of her boyfriend and your husband?? Jeez. Derek assures her that they are being safe. OMG. Chris is cutting a green pepper and Derek asks if he can help with anything. Chris says he's good and then proceeds to sharpen a knife while giving Derek a not-so-nice look. HAHA. Chris asks what Derek "does" and Derek tells him that he's still working at Blockbuster. Chris tells him that Ashley is a huge responsibility and she's not ready to be a grown up so he better be careful.
TERESA
She's at the OB/GYN for a check-up and she brought Gia with her. Teresa is concerned because she knows that intercourse can bring on labor and she and Joe have a "very active sex life". GROSS. She and Joe decided that they don't want to know the sex of the baby - despite Gia's begging - because it's their last one and they want to be surprised.
CAROLINE
Al and Caroline are hosting a "Sheriff's Dinner" at their home and they enlist Chris and Albie to help clean the backyard. Specifically, Al wants them to make sure there isn't any dog shit ANYWHERE. He tells them if it isn't done right, "I'm gonna kick your ass." HA.
Vito is Albie's roommate from college and his BEST FRIEND. Vito is also Lauren's boyfriend. HAHA. Gotta love it. Vito is helping Albie and Chris look for dog shit. Caroline tells us that Albie is having this love/hate relationship with Vito due to this new conflict (sister's boyfriend/best friend). Never a good idea to date your brother's best friend OR your best friend's sister. Never ends well.
DANIELLE
Danielle tells us that she's been going to Nischa Nails for 15 years. When she first met Dina, she was stocking shelves and doing nails there. "But I'm not here to judge." Um, Dina is also way younger than you, Danielle. Who cares what she used to do 15 years ago. "Rosa" has been doing Danielle's nails for years and always has the gossip. Rosa tells Danielle that everyone has been coming in and getting ready for this party at Caroline's house. Danielle says that she's been struggling to pay bills, so she'd like to think that's the reason they didn't invite her, but she knows it's not. Why the HELL would they invite YOU?? Really? It's a party to raise campaign funds and support the sheriffs. It's for business people. Danielle is dumb.
Danielle feels owed an apology from Caroline. Dina has moved on and occasionally sends Danielle texts to help keep her positive. I don't think Danielle should hold her breath waiting for an apology from Caroline.
CAROLINE
It's the night of the Sheriff's Fundraiser. Jacqueline has no idea why she and Chris are there. She says they just gave her $1000 and showed up. Nice. Albie and Chris are watching Lauren and Vito kiss and hug. Lauren says that she's the happiest she's ever been and wishes that Albie could just see that and be supportive.
DANIELLE
Danielle finishes her pedicure and tells her daughters that they are going for a little ride. Wait, were her daughters standing outside this whole time waiting for Danielle to get a pedicure. WTF? Anyhow, Danielle says that she just learned of Caroline's annual party. PLEASE tell me Danielle is not going over to Caroline's house. PLEASE. Jillian - her 11 year old - wisely tells Danielle that she shouldn't waste any energy on it. Amen, little one. Danielle says she never had a problem with Caroline until she called her GARBAGE.
CAROLINE
Jacqueline tells Caroline that Kim from Posche is at the party with her boyfriend. Caroline is surprised along with Jacqueline, that Kim would come knowing that there's an issue with Danielle and Caroline.
Teresa and Joe sneak in late. Teresa, Caroline, Jacqueline and Dina are all sitting at a round table. Kim (Danielle's bff from Posche) comes and sits with them. Teresa asks Kim if she's friends with Danielle anymore. Kim says that she doesn't even know Danielle well enough to call her a friend. Hmmm. Really??? That's not what you said when Danielle was in your store earlier today. Kim says that she's not her friend, but she's not going to tell her not to come in the store. It's about selling clothes, that's it. YIKES. Wait until Danielle hears this! Michael - Kim's boyfriend - is very clear about not liking Danielle and not wanting her anywhere near Kim. Dina looks really uncomfortable during this whole exchange. It's mostly Caroline, Teresa and Kim talking shit about Danielle. Well, not even talking shit. Michael is talking shit and Teresa and Caroline are just eating it up. Kim is just denying that she's friends with Danielle.
Danielle is upset and Christine is telling her to calm down. Danielle says that if they are thick as thieves why do they have to raise money for the sheriff's department. Huh? I don't get the question. Danielle wants to drive by to see how many people show up at Caroline's house to pay $1000/plate. WHY?? Don't do this to your kids.
Dina says that Kim and her boyfriend were wasted and it was like "Oktoberfest underneath that fuckin' tent." HAHA. They get to the bottom of why Kim doesn't trust Danielle and it comes out that Danielle owes Kim $400. Jacqueline doesn't know why so many people pick on Danielle. Teresa says that Danielle keeps doing the same things over and over again and she was glad Jacqueline was there to hear it. Teresa: "Danielle, you put the 'cunt' in 'cuntradiction'." Oh, Teresa.
Dina says that she was kind of annoyed because Kim is supposed to be Danielle's friend and she was just talking shit about her. Dina doesn't like the "two-faced" thing. Good for Dina.
Danielle is still on her way to drive by Caroline's house. Christine tells her MOM that she's messing herself up right now. My heart just goes out to those girls. I feel so sorry for them that Danielle is their mom. The two girls tell Danielle that she's going to make a jerk out of herself. Ouch. Christine says she's not going to support Danielle in this. Danielle keeps saying over and over that she doesn't care that she wasn't invited, but clearly she does. The girls tell her not to be a creepy stalker and that she should just go home. Danielle interviews that her kids' instincts are spot-on and she listens to them. AND, she says she wouldn't give Caroline the satisfaction of stopping by. WHATEVER. You were about to and were even in the neighborhood, but decided not to because your 15 and 11 year old BEGGED you not to because you were making an ass of yourself. Dumb.
This is going to be a good season!!
JACQUELINE
The first footage of Jacqueline and her hubby is from her own home video of her going to the hospital to give birth to her second son. Last season she told us she had 4 miscarriages in a row, but after the show ended we learned that she was pregnant. She had a baby boy, Nicholas, and he weighed exactly what I did: 8lbs. 8oz. She has such a cute family!! OMG. The baby is SO CUTE. Caroline is there and tells us that she and Jacqueline are much closer now that they are drama-free.
DINA
Dina still has that disgusting hairless cat, Grandma Wrinkles. OMG. There's a new one: Ladybug. She's white and most of her body is shaved except for her paws and her head and the tip of her tail! Dear LORD. She's trying to surround herself with positive energy. She is willing to give Danielle a second chance since Danielle is broken and troubled. Zing!
DANIELLE
Danielle has found GOD. She meets with Father Richard. Although, on the way to church, she says that God better help all those who have done her wrong. Nice. Oh, I get it. She's playing the victim with Father Richard. She tells him that these women dug up her past to humiliate her and make her feel bad for things for which she has already paid. She's very defensive and says that she KNOWS she's not all the things they called her. Father Richard correctly asks her why she cares what other people are saying about her. She says she doesn't care - LIAR. Her purpose for seeing Father Richard is that she doesn't want these women in her life anymore and wants to know how to pray for them. WTF? Seriously?
When the hell did Danielle become a "devout Catholic?" In jail? Father Richard says that she may not forget, but she needs to forgive so that she can move on with her life. A-MEN!
TERESA
Teresa, her mother and her girls are making red sauce. They're washing the tomatoes and she tells them to make sure they get rid of any rott-EN parts. They are making about 180 jars of tomato sauce to last them the year! Teresa wants to pass this tradition onto her kids. Very cute. Her dad is adorable. Teresa is due in two weeks, so she trying not to over-exert herself. She tells us that Jacqueline, Dina and Caroline are very excited for the new baby because "unlike Danielle, I have friends." Wow.
OMG. Teresa's friend is there helping them make red sauce and Teresa asks her if it's "her time of the month." Weird. Apparently, old school Italians believe that you cannot make red sauce when you are menstruating because "they say" that you can spoil the tomatoes. Random. Luckily, she's not.
Joe's mom is helping out, too. She tells Gia that she has to marry an Italian man. Gia says that her mom tells her not to and that she should marry a Jewish guy. Teresa explains that Jewish men cater to their wives. Gia whines that she doesn't want to marry a Jewish guy because they make you wear your hair all weird. I'm guessing she's talking about the Orthodox Jews with the curly sideburns. Teresa tells her not to say that. Joe tells Gia that she's 8 years old and doesn't have to worry about getting married. HA.
CAROLINE
Albert and Caroline are at Barneys buying a new suit for Albert. He's lost 70 lbs in the last year and he looks and feels great. He had a health scare and basically was told that he would have a heart attack soon. So he lost a ton of weight and looks great. Al comes out modeling a new suit and Caroline is gushing over how great he looks and starts to get a little teary. Al asks her if she's on crack. Oh, Al, you're so modest. Jacqueline spills the beans. Apparently Al had a little "help" losing all that weight. Something about a "rubber band." Interesting. I think it's a surgical procedure but not quite as dangerous as gastric bypass. Although, I could be wrong. Maybe it IS gastric bypass. HOLY CRAP!! The ONE suit, shirt, tie combo will cost $8,000 - $9,000.
JACQUELINE
Chris, her husband, sits with her and tells her he wants to talk to her about Danielle. He says that he doesn't know her well and ... he doesn't want to know her well. I actually think he's sincere during this conversation. He is a reasonable person and tells Jacqueline that every time Danielle is around there is drama and he doesn't want the drama or the bullshit in his life. He tells her that Danielle is NOT welcome in their house. And, he points out that Danielle is not even Jacqueline's "friend" - she didn't call, text, send flowers or a card, nothing when little Nicholas was born. I get that. Jacqueline says she's not going to just cut her out of her life just because he says so. I understand, but why would you even want Danielle in your life?? Chris is totally giving her an "out". She can just tell Danielle that her husband doesn't want her hanging out with Danielle. Danielle may think she's weak for doing what her husband wants, but who cares what Danielle thinks??
TERESA
It's Milania's first day of school. She and Gabriella are going to the same school and Gabriella does not look pleased. OK. I just need to comment on the amount of crap Teresa has in her pantry. Seriously. Milania is "packing" herself a snack and she's pulling chips, ho-ho's, cupcakes, etc. from boxes in the pantry. Teresa has a CRAPLOAD of money at her disposal and can afford to get healthy snacks for her kids and yet, she buys junk food? Gia is never going to be a "model" with that kind of diet. Gross. Teresa tells us that she doesn't have a nanny, so she does everything. Three kids is a lot to deal with on your own. However, she makes her life more complicated than it needs to be. She's so consumed with the superficial aspect, that she completely disregards her kids' health. There's no need to BLOW DRY your 5 year old's hair. C'mon! She's also making sure they have their "purses". Really?
OMG. They are little whining nightmares. I would not be able to deal with those girls.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to see her friend, Kim "D," who owns Posche boutique to look for clothes for Jillian and Christine - her daughters. Um, Christine is 15 now and looks really skinny. I hope all this reality drama hasn't caused an eating disorder. I worry about Danielle's kids - the crazy will eventually affect them. Danielle sits down to talk to Kim "D" in front of her kids. She tells Kim that she tried to reach out to Jacqueline and she told her Chris wasn't comfortable with their friendship. Kim tells her to take the high road. I think it's funny because Danielle says that friends show up with pasta when their friend is in the hospital - or their friend's mom is in the hospital. Where was Jacqueline's pasta when she gave birth?
JACQUELINE
Ashley is 18 now and visiting her mom with her new boyfriend, Derek (23). They bring his dog, which Jacqueline is not happy about. Chris doesn't like dogs in the house - neither does Lisa, by the way. So they put the dog in the bathroom and come into the kitchen. Jacqueline tells us that Ashley didn't like the rules, so she moved out. BUT she graduated from high school, so YAY!!!
Jacqueline wants to know what Ashley's plans are. Ashley tells her that she's taking a semester off. I love Chris. He says "what are you taking a break FROM?" HAHA. Then he asks why the dog is at the house. Ashley says that she didn't know where to leave it. Chris tells her that it's Derek's dog, so he can leave it at his house. I really love Chris. He's a man after my own heart. He tells Ashley she needs to learn some responsibility and pay her own bills and get a checking account. Ashley says she would love to get a checking account, but she doesn't know how. OMG. Lazy. They need to cut her off so she knows what it means to actually earn money.
Jacqueline is not comfortable with Ashley's relationship with Derek and asks her if they are being safe. Then she mortifies Ashley by asking if she's on birth control. Really, Jacqueline? This isn't a conversation you could have had with your daughter ALONE? You had to have it in front of her boyfriend and your husband?? Jeez. Derek assures her that they are being safe. OMG. Chris is cutting a green pepper and Derek asks if he can help with anything. Chris says he's good and then proceeds to sharpen a knife while giving Derek a not-so-nice look. HAHA. Chris asks what Derek "does" and Derek tells him that he's still working at Blockbuster. Chris tells him that Ashley is a huge responsibility and she's not ready to be a grown up so he better be careful.
TERESA
She's at the OB/GYN for a check-up and she brought Gia with her. Teresa is concerned because she knows that intercourse can bring on labor and she and Joe have a "very active sex life". GROSS. She and Joe decided that they don't want to know the sex of the baby - despite Gia's begging - because it's their last one and they want to be surprised.
CAROLINE
Al and Caroline are hosting a "Sheriff's Dinner" at their home and they enlist Chris and Albie to help clean the backyard. Specifically, Al wants them to make sure there isn't any dog shit ANYWHERE. He tells them if it isn't done right, "I'm gonna kick your ass." HA.
Vito is Albie's roommate from college and his BEST FRIEND. Vito is also Lauren's boyfriend. HAHA. Gotta love it. Vito is helping Albie and Chris look for dog shit. Caroline tells us that Albie is having this love/hate relationship with Vito due to this new conflict (sister's boyfriend/best friend). Never a good idea to date your brother's best friend OR your best friend's sister. Never ends well.
DANIELLE
Danielle tells us that she's been going to Nischa Nails for 15 years. When she first met Dina, she was stocking shelves and doing nails there. "But I'm not here to judge." Um, Dina is also way younger than you, Danielle. Who cares what she used to do 15 years ago. "Rosa" has been doing Danielle's nails for years and always has the gossip. Rosa tells Danielle that everyone has been coming in and getting ready for this party at Caroline's house. Danielle says that she's been struggling to pay bills, so she'd like to think that's the reason they didn't invite her, but she knows it's not. Why the HELL would they invite YOU?? Really? It's a party to raise campaign funds and support the sheriffs. It's for business people. Danielle is dumb.
Danielle feels owed an apology from Caroline. Dina has moved on and occasionally sends Danielle texts to help keep her positive. I don't think Danielle should hold her breath waiting for an apology from Caroline.
CAROLINE
It's the night of the Sheriff's Fundraiser. Jacqueline has no idea why she and Chris are there. She says they just gave her $1000 and showed up. Nice. Albie and Chris are watching Lauren and Vito kiss and hug. Lauren says that she's the happiest she's ever been and wishes that Albie could just see that and be supportive.
DANIELLE
Danielle finishes her pedicure and tells her daughters that they are going for a little ride. Wait, were her daughters standing outside this whole time waiting for Danielle to get a pedicure. WTF? Anyhow, Danielle says that she just learned of Caroline's annual party. PLEASE tell me Danielle is not going over to Caroline's house. PLEASE. Jillian - her 11 year old - wisely tells Danielle that she shouldn't waste any energy on it. Amen, little one. Danielle says she never had a problem with Caroline until she called her GARBAGE.
CAROLINE
Jacqueline tells Caroline that Kim from Posche is at the party with her boyfriend. Caroline is surprised along with Jacqueline, that Kim would come knowing that there's an issue with Danielle and Caroline.
Teresa and Joe sneak in late. Teresa, Caroline, Jacqueline and Dina are all sitting at a round table. Kim (Danielle's bff from Posche) comes and sits with them. Teresa asks Kim if she's friends with Danielle anymore. Kim says that she doesn't even know Danielle well enough to call her a friend. Hmmm. Really??? That's not what you said when Danielle was in your store earlier today. Kim says that she's not her friend, but she's not going to tell her not to come in the store. It's about selling clothes, that's it. YIKES. Wait until Danielle hears this! Michael - Kim's boyfriend - is very clear about not liking Danielle and not wanting her anywhere near Kim. Dina looks really uncomfortable during this whole exchange. It's mostly Caroline, Teresa and Kim talking shit about Danielle. Well, not even talking shit. Michael is talking shit and Teresa and Caroline are just eating it up. Kim is just denying that she's friends with Danielle.
Danielle is upset and Christine is telling her to calm down. Danielle says that if they are thick as thieves why do they have to raise money for the sheriff's department. Huh? I don't get the question. Danielle wants to drive by to see how many people show up at Caroline's house to pay $1000/plate. WHY?? Don't do this to your kids.
Dina says that Kim and her boyfriend were wasted and it was like "Oktoberfest underneath that fuckin' tent." HAHA. They get to the bottom of why Kim doesn't trust Danielle and it comes out that Danielle owes Kim $400. Jacqueline doesn't know why so many people pick on Danielle. Teresa says that Danielle keeps doing the same things over and over again and she was glad Jacqueline was there to hear it. Teresa: "Danielle, you put the 'cunt' in 'cuntradiction'." Oh, Teresa.
Dina says that she was kind of annoyed because Kim is supposed to be Danielle's friend and she was just talking shit about her. Dina doesn't like the "two-faced" thing. Good for Dina.
Danielle is still on her way to drive by Caroline's house. Christine tells her MOM that she's messing herself up right now. My heart just goes out to those girls. I feel so sorry for them that Danielle is their mom. The two girls tell Danielle that she's going to make a jerk out of herself. Ouch. Christine says she's not going to support Danielle in this. Danielle keeps saying over and over that she doesn't care that she wasn't invited, but clearly she does. The girls tell her not to be a creepy stalker and that she should just go home. Danielle interviews that her kids' instincts are spot-on and she listens to them. AND, she says she wouldn't give Caroline the satisfaction of stopping by. WHATEVER. You were about to and were even in the neighborhood, but decided not to because your 15 and 11 year old BEGGED you not to because you were making an ass of yourself. Dumb.
This is going to be a good season!!
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