"Country Clubbed"
BEST OPENING SCENE...EVER!!!! It picked up right where it left off last time. Teresa and Danielle go at it and start screaming at each other. Danielle says that Teresa's house is in foreclosure and the gloves come off!! Teresa is chasing Danielle through all the people. Danielle is running with her "bodyguard" and her heels on her shoes break. She finally makes it outside and she's SO F***ING DRAMATIC. He's hyperventilating in a corner outside and she just keeps screaming "Keep her away from me. Get me outta here." Oh good LORD. The drama. No one was trying to hurt her or do any harm to her, but she's so freakin' dramatic. Teresa cannot be held back and while Jacqueline is concentrating on holding back Teresa, Ashley sneaks around and PULLS DANIELLE'S WEAVE as she's being CARRIED away by Kim G's "driver." DRAMA.
No, I don't think Ashley should have pulled Danielle's hair. No, I don't think Teresa should have said "hello" or anything to Danielle. But, FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, Danielle made the situation 10 times worse than it needed to be. She's crying hysterically in the car and just such a freakin' victim. Annoying.
Teresa walks over to the Bentley and insists on talking to Danielle. The "driver" knows Teresa isn't going to "do" anything to Danielle, but tries to convince her to just walk away. Danielle is blowing this way out of proportion. Jacqueline is annoyed by the whole situation and tries to get Teresa to come back to the party and leave Danielle alone. Danielle is in the car crying that she told Kim G this would happen - what happened, Danielle??? Seriously, you freaked out and made a spectacle of yourself.
Ashley walks up and Jacqueline tells her to GO HOME. Ashley brats that Jacqueline is picking Danielle over her own daughter. STFU Ashley. Seriously. You just pulled someone's hair. STUPID. OH GOOD LORD. Danielle cries in her interview that she's in pain physically and emotionally. Physically?? Really? Because someone pulled your hair?? Danielle is all sorts of crazy right now.
Danielle calls the police. DRAMA! Teresa is done and walks away and says that she's over Kim G. Done. Kim G walks out of the car to talk to Jacqueline. Danielle yells to not let Kim G hit Jacqueline. As if! Kim G is not going to hit anyone. As much as she feeds into Danielle's narcissism, she's too classy. Kim G is probably SO HUMILIATED right now. She walks up to Jacqueline and asks what happened. Jacqueline is very calm. She tells Kim G that Danielle talks a lot of shit behind people's backs and when she's confronted she acts like a victim. Kim G agrees and tells her driver to get her bag so they can get the hell out of there.
Inside the "party", Teresa and Kim D are talking and Kim G and her driver walk up. Kim G seems like she's totally on their side. She tells Teresa that she knows she tried to be nice to Danielle. Kim D tells Kim G that she has to make a decision. Kim G is just embarrassed. You can tell. Then, Ashley walks in and tells them that she pulled Danielle's hair because she thought Danielle touched her mom. Teresa says that they told her not to do anything. Ashley is NOT apologizing.
The Police call Danielle and she cries to them that she was "attacked" and "assaulted" and names Teresa and Ashley and Jacqueline. She's horrible. By far the worst "housewife" out of all the shows. She's so annoying. Jacqueline is standing in front of the car because she wants to make sure that nothing else happens and that Teresa stays inside and that Danielle stays in the car.
The Police arrive and Danielle cries to them and asks them to make Jacqueline go away. The Police call Jacqueline over to the car and Danielle starts screaming "NO!!" OMG. Enough with the drama. She cries and cries and says she wants to go home. She interviews that she "will never forget this" and wants the women to leave her alone. If that were true, she would NOT have shown up at the event and she wouldn't be on this show.
The Police keep asking if she's hurt and she keeps saying that she's an emotional mess right now. True. Then she talks about the hair pulling. An officer asks Ashley why she pulled Danielle's hair and she says that she thought Danielle hit her mom. The Police take Ashley's information and tell her that she'll just have to appear if Danielle presses charges. They try to take Teresa's statement but she says that nothing happened and she didn't do anything. Danielle is in the car crying and trembling and Kim G is trying to calm her down. She keeps saying that she didn't want to come. THEN WHY DID YOU??? She's such a liar. If you were really that terrified, then you would not have put yourself in that position. STUPID.
Interestingly, the cops told Jacqueline that they are very familiar with Danielle and her drama. They ended up letting Ashley go. Danielle doesn't understand why they didn't arrest anyone. I'll tell you Danielle - it's because you cry wolf and are a drama queen. That's why.
NEXT DAY
Teresa and Jacqueline are filling Caroline in on what happened and they are laughing and retelling the story. Danielle, on the other hand, is filling Danny in on the events and playing the victim. She says that these woman want to do bodily harm to her.
Jacqueline tells Caroline that Ashley pulled Danielle's hair and that's when Caroline gets concerned. Jacqueline tells her it's because Ashley thought that Danielle hit her mom. Danielle tells Danny that handfuls of hair were pulled out of her head - I actually think it was just her weave - and hurt her neck. Oh, now it's the neck. Oy vey.
Caroline is pissed at them because she thinks they gave Danielle exactly what she wanted. And, she's concerned about what will happen to Ashley as a result. I agree.
CAROLINE
Albie goes to see an attorney. Apparently, if you get dismissed from law school, you have to wait 2 years before applying anywhere else. Yikes. That sucks. I don't think that's the law in CA. The lawyer's assessment is that his school dropped the ball by not affirmatively offering a student with a disability services. So she wants them to write a letter to help Albie get into another school.
DANIELLE
Danielle is driving and gets a call from her "energist". Seriously? Danielle says that she's scared because she thinks Teresa and Jacqueline want to physically hurt her. Paranoid much? The energist feeds into Danielle's drama and asks if she can talk to Jacqueline to try to diffuse the situation. Danielle agrees and gives her Jacqueline's number.
TERESA
OMG. This is the funniest scene. Teresa has to tell Joe what happened with Danielle the other night. She goes through the whole thing and Joe can't believe Danielle is such a drama queen. Teresa mentions Kim G's name and Joe has no idea who she is. Teresa says "she's the older lady." See?? I'm not the only one who thinks Kim G looks old. At the end, Teresa asks "So I did good?" and Joe says "You did good." HAHA.
JACQUELINE
Danielle's energist calls Jacqueline and as soon as she says that she works with Danielle, Jacqueline rolls her eyes. I'm with you, girl. The energist goes into her spiel about how she wants to help Jacqueline move on and Jacqueline says that Danielle is evil and repels everyone. Jacqueline finally agrees to let the energist "help her" and the whole time she is playing a video game on her iPhone. HAHAHA!! Jacqueline is just bullshitting this woman and the energist is feeling like she's making a breakthrough. HAHAHA!!
In the middle of it, Jacqueline asks if she thinks this is helping Danielle. Because that's supposed to be the point, right?
CAROLINE
Albie comes home and tells his mom and dad about the meeting with the lawyer. He doesn't want to get into a big legal battle with the school. He just wants to get back into school...anywhere. I LOVE this family. They are so supportive.
DANIELLE
Kim G and Danielle meet at a diner - I imagine it's because Kim G doesn't want to be seen out and about with the crazy train. Danielle tells Kim G that she's pressing charges against Ashley - you know, because her neck was hurt and she still has trouble "looking up." Stupid. Danielle is SO HAPPY that Ashley pulled her hair because now she has a reason to press charges and go after her. DANIELLE IS SO ANNOYING.
JACQUELINE
OMG. Ashley is really immature. Jacqueline wants to talk about that night and asks Ashley why she didn't just stay out of it like she told her to in the first place. Again, Ashley says that Jacqueline is picking Danielle over her and that Danielle is the saint and she's the bad guy. OMG. Get over yourself Ashley. You did something stupid. You should NOT have pulled her hair. That was dumb and now you will pay the price. Stop being so dramatic.
Ashley says that she had every right to pull Danielle's hair and that she can do whatever she wants to Danielle. Actually no. That's not true. Jacqueline tells her that there will be consequences for what she has done. Chris comes in to talk to Ashley, too. He tells her to mind her own business and that being 18 doesn't mean you get to do whatever you want. She says she can and he asks her who is going to help her now that she's in trouble. She doesn't understand and he asks who is going to pay for an attorney when she has to go to the hearing. She shrugs. Then Jacqueline brings up Facebook and tells Ashley again to stop posting stuff on there. Ashley is SO DISRESPECTFUL to Jacqueline. It's so frustrating.
Chris finally gets fed up and tells Ashley to either be more respectful or get the hell out of his house!! He tells her that she needs to shut the hell up or she's outta there. Damn. Chris is pissed. He tells her that she needs to suffer consequences so that she can learn. He also says that if she wants to be all "Miss Independent" then she can move her ass out and take care of her own damn self. A-MEN!
He ends by telling her that if she contacts Danielle at all, she can pack her shit and move her ass out of the house.
See you next week!
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