"The Belle of Elle"
Kelly comes in and tells Whitney that Glamour selected her for a full page write up on her new line. They love Whitney's skirts so they'll shoot a "look" and then Whitney will get to pick up all the other accessories for the look that under $100. Kelly says that she wants Whitney to go with April because she thinks it will be cool for her to show up with "representation." Whitney asks if she can bring Roxy instead. Kelly: "God. Are we going to do this again?" HAHA. I love that Kelly hates Roxy and has no problem just telling Whitney - and Roxy - to her face. Whitney defends Roxy and says that Roxy has helped her so much throughout this process. Kelly wants to know how exactly Roxy has "helped" Whitney. Kelly: "I gave her a paycheck and you got her a job. How has she helped you?" I love Kelly. Kelly explains that Roxy is NOT Glamour and that if she keeps bringing Roxy everywhere, people will start associating her with Whitney's line. Kelly tells Whitney to do whatever she wants. As she's leaving she says "Oh, and on the Roxy thing, I've never been wrong." HA!
ELLE MAGAZINE
Joe Zee is rushing out the door, but stops by Olivia's cubicle to ask her if she's free tomorrow night. Eric Damon, the costume designer for Gossip Girl (!!!) is having a big party because he has a book coming out. So Joe asks Olivia to come with him. As an afterthought, he extends the invite to Erin, but she tells him she's meeting with Page Six tomorrow night.
GLAMOUR MAGAZINE
Whitney shows up to meet with Madeline Escudero (Market Editor), Sasha Iglehart (Deputy Fashion Director) and Maria Duenas (Accessories Editor). Sasha shows her what her page will look like. Maria asks Whitney if the designs are all hers or if she collaborates with someone else. Whitney says that they are all her own designs and then brings up Roxy. WHY??? They, of course, assume she's her partner. Whitney says that she's not her partner, but she's supported her throughout the process. Why wouldn't Whitney says she's with her PR Firm??? Dumb. Anyhow, they tell her that she's welcome to bring Roxy to the layout. UGH.
ERIC DAMON PARTY
Joe, Olivia and Seth (Robbie's asst) are enjoying the party. All the Gossip Girl stars are there. I would LOVE to be there. So awesome. Joe comments that Erin is missing a fun night. Cut to ...
ERIN
Erin is having drinks with Neel Shah, a writer for Page Six. He asks about the addition of Alexis to Elle and Erin calls her "Elle's new Belle." Then Neel asks about the Elle gossip so Erin tells him about Olivia and the Whitney debacle. Neel thinks that would be a great story. HAHA. Erin just doesn't care anymore.
ELLE MAGAZINE
Seth comes up to Olivia and Erin and chats about the event. Olivia excuses herself and Seth is amazed that Olivia knows so many famous people. Erin says that she probably goes to a lot of parties. Seth doesn't understand how Olivia could party with the rich and famous and then come to Elle and do a job. Erin says that she doesn't care what Olivia does on her own time as long as she gets her job done. Seth asks if she's getting her job done, though. Erin doesn't really answer. HA.
Olivia walks into Joe's office and give him the accessories pages for the next issue. He's overly impressed. Joe tells Olivia that he's hosting a party at Bergdorf Goodman with Linda Fargo (Bergdorf) for Elie Tahari. Olivia says she'd love to attend and Joe reminds her to wear Elie Tahari to the party.
WHITNEY
Roxy and Whitney grab some lunch and Whitney tells Roxy that Samantha invited her to the Elie Tahari party. She tells Roxy that Kelly was not supportive of her decision to bring Roxy to Glamour. But Whitney is going to bring Roxy anyway. Bad move.
ELIE TAHARI PARTY
Whitney wants to talk to Linda Fargo and Genni Hershey-Lambert from Bergdorf who she met in the beginning of the season when she showed them her pieces. That meeting didn't go so well, so Whitney would like to talk to them to make a new impression. Alexis is talking to Neel Shah from Page Six, Joe and Olivia are talking to Elie and Linda. Ginny comes up to Whitney and they talk about her line. It's all going well. Neel comes up to Joe and Olivia and asks Olivia how things are going with Erin. Olivia avoids the question and Joe saves her with talk of Alexis. Neel has gotten all he needs and will write his story ... but what will it be about??
GLAMOUR
Whitney is putting together a look for Glamour with Maria and Madeline. She's having trouble with the accessories and wonders where Roxy is. Roxy finally shows up ... late ... and doesn't have much positive stuff to contribute. She thinks the looks that Whitney is putting together are too "girly" and "boring" - um, has she seen Glamour? It's not exactly The Guardian. She pulls out some random stuff and Sasha comes in to check out the looks. Whitney has a few looks. The first is her look - girly and whimsical. The second look is the one Roxy worked on. Roxy tells Sasha her unsolicited opinion on the look she picked out and calls it "hooker, but in a good way." This scene was so hard to watch. I was embarrassed for Roxy and for Whitney. I just wanted it to stop. I actually paused it a few times because Roxy just blew it.
ELLE MAGAZINE
Joe calls a fashion meeting and Alexis, Erin and Olivia are all there. He talks about the busy week and all the events. THEN, he pulls out a copy of Page Six and says that Elle got a shout out. The article leads with Elle's new belle, Alexis Bryan Morgan!! Joe give props to Erin for getting that mention in Page Six!! WOOT!
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Kelly calls Roxy and Whitney into her office to go over the Glamour shoot. Kelly talked to Sasha and they chose the polka-dot skirt look that Whitney worked on...the "girly" look. Whitney says she loved that look, but her favorite was a ballerina skirt look. Kelly interrupts and asks if it was, by chance, called the "hooker ballerina look" because she heard that Whitney took an assistant which she is assuming was Roxy. HAHA. Kelly tells Roxy that if she was there as an assistant it's just not appropriate for her to say things like that. Particularly at such a girly magazine!!
Kelly: "This town is made up of freaks and followers. And I'm totally a freak. So, you wanna be a freak? That's great, but you pay the price. Good luck."
She dismisses Roxy and finishes up with Whitney. Kelly tells Whitney that she's never wrong about Roxy. And they've established today that Roxy is a freak so Whitney can't take her to non-freaky places. Done and done.
Whitney walks out to talk to Roxy and says that she thought Roxy overstepped a little. Roxy replies that she doesn't feel like she has to apologize and pretend that's not who she is. Whitney is a little stunned. Yikes.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
The Hills, Season 6, Episode 5
"A New Bird"
KRISTIN
Brody and Kristin are having dinner and drinks. Kristin brings up Audrina (again!!) and tells Brody how happy she is with Ryan Cabrera. Brody says that Ryan Cabrera is growing on him and he thinks he's pretty cool for a has-been one-hit wonder. :) Brody wants to make it clear that he and Kristin can date other people because he knows that Kristin is a chick and wants a relationship even though she tells him she LOVES being single. He tells Kristin that he has a date and Kristin pretends to be cool with it. Oh jeez...here we go.
AUDRINA
Ryan Cabrera and Audrina are hanging out at her place. She tells him that her friends are planning night out and she tells him to come and give her friends another chance. Ryan Cabrera doesn't want the "drama" and thinks he's too cool for school and declines the invitation. He tells Audrina he'll be waiting at home in his "candy thong reading 'Catcher in the Rye'." Oh Ryan Cabrera, you are NO Holden Caulfield.
SHE-PRATT/LO
She-Pratt tells Lo that she's ready for a relationship. She says that she's doing the AA thing and feeling good about saying 'Sayonara" to the Pratts, so she's ready now. Lo tells her that her bf, Scott, has a friend, Max, who would be PERFECT. Then She-Pratt backpedals and says that guys are going to think she's weird because she's 23 and SOBER. Lo is awesome and says that any guy who thinks it's "weird" or freaks out because she doesn't drink is NOT the guy for her.
KRISTIN/AUDRINA
The new bff's are drinking screw top white wine and eating popcorn. Of course, the convo turns to Brody. UGH. New material, please, writers. Kristin tells Audrina that they aren't together but they have added benefits to their friend status. Audrina tells her to be careful because Brody is a FLIRT and will make you feel super special one minute and then be with someone else the next minute. Kristin decides that it would be a great idea to call Brody...right now. While she has company. Good idea, Kristin. Brody ignores her call because he is with someone and it's RUDE TO GET ON THE PHONE WHEN YOU ARE HANGING OUT WITH SOMEONE. Jeez. Kristin needs some serious cellphone etiquette. Kristin bitches that Brody's phone went straight to voicemail for the THIRD time today. YOU ARE NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND. Why is this so hard to understand?? This is why girls get such a bad rap for being psycho. He could not have been clearer about the fact that he's dating and doesn't want a girlfriend. Ugh.
BRODY
Meanwhile, Brody is on a date with McKaela who spells her name wrong. I hate it when people don't know how to spell their names. It's M-I-C-H-A-E-L-A...or something like that. I don't know, it's not my name. But I DO know that it's certainly not spelled McKaela. Anyhow, she is seriously Lauren Conrad's brunette, brown-eyed doppelganger. She looks like a dark version of LC. Well, Brody certainly has a type. :) Brody tells McKaela that Kristin - his ex girlfriend - was calling him and that they are good friends. McKaela looks skeptical and they toast to meeting new people. Then Brody calls her McKenna. I'm serious. I listened to it several times. Does he really not know her name? They flirt a little more and then take off together to do dirty things, I'm sure.
BRODY
Charlie and Brody are playing some golf and talking about chicks. Brody tells Charlie that he told Kristin about McKaela and she got all quiet. Charlie tells him that the girls are a hard group to infiltrate so he hopes McKaela can handle it. Brody says he's not keeping her away just because the girls are tough on new people. Brody asks why guys can't just hook up with their friends and date other people. Charlie says you can and it's called "casual dating." I agree, Charlie. Unfortunately, it never works. If you're straight with the girl, she'll tell you to your face that she "totally agrees" but then get super jealous and pissed. If you don't have the convo with the girl, you're a douchebag if you date other girls because the assumption is that you're exclusive - even though the girl would never admit that. It's a no-win situation. You just have to be a dick and hook up and not call and jam out of there in the morning.
SHE-PRATT/AUDRINA
It may be time to let She-Pratt be Stephanie. I'm not quite ready to make that leap just yet, but maybe next time. She's certainly improved since past seasons. She and Audrina are having some tea and chit chat. Audrina has convinced Ryan Cabrera to come out tonight with everyone and She-Pratt says she's glad Ryan Cabrera let her come over to visit. I guess Audrina has been spending every waking minute with her new bf and has been MIA. She-Pratt tells her that Lo is setting her up on a date with one of Scott's friends. Even though she went on and on to Lo about how ready she was to date, she tells Audrina that she's totally not ready. She's insecure about being sober at 23 AND about her estrangement with her crazy brother and his plastic wife. Get over it already. I'd be more worried about being a drunk who hangs out with the Pratts. She tells Audrina that Max is a professional lacrosse player with Scott, but she doesn't really know what that is. Oy!
JANE'S HOUSE (club)
The gang shows up at the club and Brody and McKaela are hanging out. The girls are all confused because they thought Brody and Kristin were together. UGH. Now, while I think the girls are being dumb and making way too much of everything, I also think Brody is an instigator. He loves the drama and totally brings it on! He's all over McKaela and holds her hand. Then when Kristin and Stacie the Bartender come in, he makes a LOUD comment to Kristin about not being very sincere when she says hello to McKaela. WTF? I think both were wrong at this outing. Grow up, people. Kristin goes over to the girls and they are all huddled and talking shit about Brody. So, Brody gets up and he and McKaela leave...but not without calling Kristin out for not being nice to McKaela. Awkward. Kristin gets defensive and the scene is just embarrassing to watch.
KRISTIN
Kristin bitches the next day to Stacie the Bartender. Stacie the Bartender actually makes some good points and tells Kristin that she shouldn't be surprised. She knew what she was getting into with Brody. But then she tells Kristin to talk to Brody. Um, what? I don't know about that.
SHE-PRATT/LO
She-Pratt is getting ready for the double date and she has some AMAZING shoes!! I wants her closet. The boys arrive and Lo lets them in. Max is adorable. She-Pratt walks out and has a total short circuit. Scott asks her if she's been to the W in Westwood and she just stares straight ahead. Weird-o. She snaps back and then acts like they are the ones who are being weird. Great first impression, She-Pratt. Can I just comment on the fashion in this scene for a moment? Lo and She-Pratt are dressed like they are about to attend a premiere. They have dresses on and look amazing. Their shoes are at least 4 inches high and their hair and make-up is completely done. Scott, Lo's bf, is wearing a flannel shirt (circa 1992) and jeans. And Max is wearing a T-shirt and a V-neck sweater (not bad) with a HOODIE! I shit you not. WTF? I mean, really? That's the best you could do?
They arrive at their table at the W and everyone orders an adult beverage and She-Pratt orders a Coke and ... wait for it ... nothing happens. No one freaks out or acts weird. I have to admit, even though I love Lo, in this scene, she's annoying. We get it. It's a set up. But you don't have to constantly remind them that you're setting them up. It's just weird. Lo and Scott are staring at Max and She-Pratt and making comments about how perfect they are together. Ew. It's weird. Lo excuses herself to the ladies' room and She-Pratt joins her. She-Pratt says that she likes Max and thinks he's super cute. BUT she wishes he was older. WTF? He's 24 and you are 23, She-Pratt. I'm so glad I didn't switch back to "Stephanie" yet. She's totally being a She-Pratt right now. Lo tells her to get over herself and forget about his stupid age.
After dinner, they walk outside and Max offers She-Pratt his ... HOODIE. Then he asks her if she wants to do this again without Lo and Scott. She says yes and gives him her digits. Cute. :)
KRISTIN
Kristin comes over to Brody's place to bitch at him and flip out. She starts in and Brody says that he's allowed to like whoever he wants and he likes McKaela and he likes Kristin. Kristin tells him that he has to choose because she's not going to wait around forever. Brody and I are both confused and he says that he and Kristin are friends and he thought they had an understanding about dating other people. Yeah, so did I! Kristin tells him to shut up. Nice. Then she says something that I can actually understand. She says dating other people is one thing, but bringing that other person around and totally being all over that person in front of her is another story. It's rude and disrespectful. I agree with that. The problem is that it's going to get worse because Kristin is NOT ok with Brody dating other people but she wants to save face and won't admit that. Even though it's totally obvious. Brody just needs to remove the "benefits" and just stick to being friends with Kristin.
Kristin says she's sorry for not being nice to Brody's "new little girlfriend" and then they start talking over one another. Kristin is being crazy and defensive and Brody is insisting that McKaela is not his girlfriend. Kristin totally freaks out, yells at Brody and then storms out of his condo. Jeez. Crazy.
Brody: "We're friends, Kristin. Remember that."
Kristin: "Shut up." SLAM.
HAHAHA. See you next week.
KRISTIN
Brody and Kristin are having dinner and drinks. Kristin brings up Audrina (again!!) and tells Brody how happy she is with Ryan Cabrera. Brody says that Ryan Cabrera is growing on him and he thinks he's pretty cool for a has-been one-hit wonder. :) Brody wants to make it clear that he and Kristin can date other people because he knows that Kristin is a chick and wants a relationship even though she tells him she LOVES being single. He tells Kristin that he has a date and Kristin pretends to be cool with it. Oh jeez...here we go.
AUDRINA
Ryan Cabrera and Audrina are hanging out at her place. She tells him that her friends are planning night out and she tells him to come and give her friends another chance. Ryan Cabrera doesn't want the "drama" and thinks he's too cool for school and declines the invitation. He tells Audrina he'll be waiting at home in his "candy thong reading 'Catcher in the Rye'." Oh Ryan Cabrera, you are NO Holden Caulfield.
SHE-PRATT/LO
She-Pratt tells Lo that she's ready for a relationship. She says that she's doing the AA thing and feeling good about saying 'Sayonara" to the Pratts, so she's ready now. Lo tells her that her bf, Scott, has a friend, Max, who would be PERFECT. Then She-Pratt backpedals and says that guys are going to think she's weird because she's 23 and SOBER. Lo is awesome and says that any guy who thinks it's "weird" or freaks out because she doesn't drink is NOT the guy for her.
KRISTIN/AUDRINA
The new bff's are drinking screw top white wine and eating popcorn. Of course, the convo turns to Brody. UGH. New material, please, writers. Kristin tells Audrina that they aren't together but they have added benefits to their friend status. Audrina tells her to be careful because Brody is a FLIRT and will make you feel super special one minute and then be with someone else the next minute. Kristin decides that it would be a great idea to call Brody...right now. While she has company. Good idea, Kristin. Brody ignores her call because he is with someone and it's RUDE TO GET ON THE PHONE WHEN YOU ARE HANGING OUT WITH SOMEONE. Jeez. Kristin needs some serious cellphone etiquette. Kristin bitches that Brody's phone went straight to voicemail for the THIRD time today. YOU ARE NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND. Why is this so hard to understand?? This is why girls get such a bad rap for being psycho. He could not have been clearer about the fact that he's dating and doesn't want a girlfriend. Ugh.
BRODY
Meanwhile, Brody is on a date with McKaela who spells her name wrong. I hate it when people don't know how to spell their names. It's M-I-C-H-A-E-L-A...or something like that. I don't know, it's not my name. But I DO know that it's certainly not spelled McKaela. Anyhow, she is seriously Lauren Conrad's brunette, brown-eyed doppelganger. She looks like a dark version of LC. Well, Brody certainly has a type. :) Brody tells McKaela that Kristin - his ex girlfriend - was calling him and that they are good friends. McKaela looks skeptical and they toast to meeting new people. Then Brody calls her McKenna. I'm serious. I listened to it several times. Does he really not know her name? They flirt a little more and then take off together to do dirty things, I'm sure.
BRODY
Charlie and Brody are playing some golf and talking about chicks. Brody tells Charlie that he told Kristin about McKaela and she got all quiet. Charlie tells him that the girls are a hard group to infiltrate so he hopes McKaela can handle it. Brody says he's not keeping her away just because the girls are tough on new people. Brody asks why guys can't just hook up with their friends and date other people. Charlie says you can and it's called "casual dating." I agree, Charlie. Unfortunately, it never works. If you're straight with the girl, she'll tell you to your face that she "totally agrees" but then get super jealous and pissed. If you don't have the convo with the girl, you're a douchebag if you date other girls because the assumption is that you're exclusive - even though the girl would never admit that. It's a no-win situation. You just have to be a dick and hook up and not call and jam out of there in the morning.
SHE-PRATT/AUDRINA
It may be time to let She-Pratt be Stephanie. I'm not quite ready to make that leap just yet, but maybe next time. She's certainly improved since past seasons. She and Audrina are having some tea and chit chat. Audrina has convinced Ryan Cabrera to come out tonight with everyone and She-Pratt says she's glad Ryan Cabrera let her come over to visit. I guess Audrina has been spending every waking minute with her new bf and has been MIA. She-Pratt tells her that Lo is setting her up on a date with one of Scott's friends. Even though she went on and on to Lo about how ready she was to date, she tells Audrina that she's totally not ready. She's insecure about being sober at 23 AND about her estrangement with her crazy brother and his plastic wife. Get over it already. I'd be more worried about being a drunk who hangs out with the Pratts. She tells Audrina that Max is a professional lacrosse player with Scott, but she doesn't really know what that is. Oy!
JANE'S HOUSE (club)
The gang shows up at the club and Brody and McKaela are hanging out. The girls are all confused because they thought Brody and Kristin were together. UGH. Now, while I think the girls are being dumb and making way too much of everything, I also think Brody is an instigator. He loves the drama and totally brings it on! He's all over McKaela and holds her hand. Then when Kristin and Stacie the Bartender come in, he makes a LOUD comment to Kristin about not being very sincere when she says hello to McKaela. WTF? I think both were wrong at this outing. Grow up, people. Kristin goes over to the girls and they are all huddled and talking shit about Brody. So, Brody gets up and he and McKaela leave...but not without calling Kristin out for not being nice to McKaela. Awkward. Kristin gets defensive and the scene is just embarrassing to watch.
KRISTIN
Kristin bitches the next day to Stacie the Bartender. Stacie the Bartender actually makes some good points and tells Kristin that she shouldn't be surprised. She knew what she was getting into with Brody. But then she tells Kristin to talk to Brody. Um, what? I don't know about that.
SHE-PRATT/LO
She-Pratt is getting ready for the double date and she has some AMAZING shoes!! I wants her closet. The boys arrive and Lo lets them in. Max is adorable. She-Pratt walks out and has a total short circuit. Scott asks her if she's been to the W in Westwood and she just stares straight ahead. Weird-o. She snaps back and then acts like they are the ones who are being weird. Great first impression, She-Pratt. Can I just comment on the fashion in this scene for a moment? Lo and She-Pratt are dressed like they are about to attend a premiere. They have dresses on and look amazing. Their shoes are at least 4 inches high and their hair and make-up is completely done. Scott, Lo's bf, is wearing a flannel shirt (circa 1992) and jeans. And Max is wearing a T-shirt and a V-neck sweater (not bad) with a HOODIE! I shit you not. WTF? I mean, really? That's the best you could do?
They arrive at their table at the W and everyone orders an adult beverage and She-Pratt orders a Coke and ... wait for it ... nothing happens. No one freaks out or acts weird. I have to admit, even though I love Lo, in this scene, she's annoying. We get it. It's a set up. But you don't have to constantly remind them that you're setting them up. It's just weird. Lo and Scott are staring at Max and She-Pratt and making comments about how perfect they are together. Ew. It's weird. Lo excuses herself to the ladies' room and She-Pratt joins her. She-Pratt says that she likes Max and thinks he's super cute. BUT she wishes he was older. WTF? He's 24 and you are 23, She-Pratt. I'm so glad I didn't switch back to "Stephanie" yet. She's totally being a She-Pratt right now. Lo tells her to get over herself and forget about his stupid age.
After dinner, they walk outside and Max offers She-Pratt his ... HOODIE. Then he asks her if she wants to do this again without Lo and Scott. She says yes and gives him her digits. Cute. :)
KRISTIN
Kristin comes over to Brody's place to bitch at him and flip out. She starts in and Brody says that he's allowed to like whoever he wants and he likes McKaela and he likes Kristin. Kristin tells him that he has to choose because she's not going to wait around forever. Brody and I are both confused and he says that he and Kristin are friends and he thought they had an understanding about dating other people. Yeah, so did I! Kristin tells him to shut up. Nice. Then she says something that I can actually understand. She says dating other people is one thing, but bringing that other person around and totally being all over that person in front of her is another story. It's rude and disrespectful. I agree with that. The problem is that it's going to get worse because Kristin is NOT ok with Brody dating other people but she wants to save face and won't admit that. Even though it's totally obvious. Brody just needs to remove the "benefits" and just stick to being friends with Kristin.
Kristin says she's sorry for not being nice to Brody's "new little girlfriend" and then they start talking over one another. Kristin is being crazy and defensive and Brody is insisting that McKaela is not his girlfriend. Kristin totally freaks out, yells at Brody and then storms out of his condo. Jeez. Crazy.
Brody: "We're friends, Kristin. Remember that."
Kristin: "Shut up." SLAM.
HAHAHA. See you next week.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 4
"Babies, Bubbles and Bubbies"
TERESA
Teresa wakes her husband up because she is feeling a lot of pressure "down there." So she knows she's in labor and takes about 2 hours to get ready to go to the hospital. She's packing make-up, clothes, jewelry, etc. She's reading email, making french toast for her daughter and calling friends. Seriously the woman has 4 bags. Who is she??
At the hospital, she's applying make-up. She's so late, they gave away her room. Joe tells her he wants 3 more kids. Teresa says that she's done. He can have the next one. HA! She finally gets a room and is horrified by the gown she has to wear. She wants to wear her own.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Christopher that his friend, "the car wash guy" is in town. So he comes up to meet Chris because, as Caroline tells us, they don't have a car wash to put Chris into, so all they can do is hook them up with one of their friends who has one. I don't know why, but Chris just seems so slimy - like a used car salesman.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters are having dinner. Christine is such a smart girl...it's a shame Danielle is her mother. Christine knows that the modeling industry is a tough industry to make it in. Danielle interviews that Christine asked her not to talk about what happened at the fashion show when she almost threw up and fainted. So, of course, Danielle tells us about it again. Christine says that she'll understand if she doesn't make it. She'll know it was because the industry just wasn't ready for her. Jillian says "and you weren't ready for it" and Christine gets annoyed and quiet. Jillian is a smart girl. Danielle is clueless and doesn't understand what just happened.
TERESA
Teresa is in labor and making calls to everyone. She's even got phone calls on the room phone. She asks Joe what he's going to get her for having this kid. She thinks diamonds are appropriate. He says he'll go to Africa to get them and Teresa is surprised that they have diamonds in Africa. Wow. It's like she lives under a rock. She is getting an epidural and she cries a little, then she immediately gets concerned that her make-up is all messed up. OY!
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes over to apologize for freaking out on her mom last time she was over. Jacqueline says that she just worries about Ashley. Jacqueline asks Ashley if she'd be interested in seeing a Life Coach. Ashley thinks it's a dumb idea because she already has a plan. Her plan is to take a year off, then go to junior college in the spring and transfer to a four-year college in the fall. She has no idea what she wants to study or where. But she has a plan, y'all.
CAROLINE
Chris goes to a strip club to meet up with the manager because he really wants to do his strip club/car wash business. The manager tells him that it's not a "strip club", it's a gentleman's club. Oh Lord! He tells Chris to get the "feel" for a gentleman's club. Um, he's not even 21. Albie shows up with his buddy, Frank. Who are these people??
TERESA
She's screaming like a banshee. It's a GIRL!!! Teresa sounds like Fran Dresher. The baby name is Audriana. She's really cute.
JACQUELINE
She and Chris have a glass of wine. She wants to talk about Ashley. She tells him about the Life Coach idea and Chris starts laughing. He says that when he was growing up, it was a beating. Dina interviews that a wooden spoon is a much more effective coach. There's a HUGE safe in the room and she insists on seeing what is inside. It's like an arsenal. INSANE and terrifying.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to a diner to meet her friend, Kathy. Kathy tells Danielle that the owner of the diner has a baby who has cancer. So he's having a fundraiser for her daughter and wants Danielle to come to support the baby. Danielle says that she will absolutely be at the fundraiser and do whatever she can for the baby. She finds out that the event is at the Brownstone. She "claims" that she doesn't want to go to the Brownstone but she will go there for this baby. (insert eyeroll here).
DINA
Caroline and Jacqueline meet up with Dina because she wants to talk to them. Dina tells them that she needs to talk to Danielle - in person - to tell her that she doesn't want her in her life anymore. Caroline and Jacqueline don't understand why she needs to meet with Danielle to "tell" her this. I agree. I always think it's weird when girls "break up" with their friends. If you don't want to talk to someone or have them in your life anymore, then just stop. That's all you have to do! It's just so dramatic. I think it's unnecessary, but maybe Dina just needs that for closure.
CAROLINE
Chris is working for the day at the family friend's car wash. Rick leaves Chris in charge for the day to see how he does. Chris's first action is to bring in the skanks...er...girls. They put on the T-Shirts and try to bring in business with their daisy dukes and tight shirts. It works!! Caroline stops by to check in on Chris and she is a little concerned about all the girls. She meets "Bianca" outside and then walks inside and meets a "Bianca" look-a-like, "Nicole". Rick shows up at the end of the day and he's in SHOCK! He says he wouldn't have brought in the girls, but he's SO EXCITED by the huge amount of business!! This may not be such a bad idea after all.
DANIELLE
Danielle is at her friend, Danny's house. Danny is an ex-con who is on parole. John is Danny's thug friend and he's there, too. Danielle tells him about her rift with the Manzo's. John and Danny are both ex-felons. Danielle is just creating drama for herself. She asks Danny and John to escort her to the Brownstone event because she's afraid of something going down. Are you kidding? What are they going to do to Danielle at a charity event?? It's so ridiculous. She's so dramatic. They agree and Danielle tells us "When Danny takes my back, people better be listening." Get over yourself! Seriously??
DINA
Dina brings a GINORMOUS teddy bear for baby Audriana. She's super cute. She's got a knit cap with a huge flower on it. Teresa is in leopard print pajamas. Teresa asks Dina to be Audriana's godmother. Dina gets all emotional. It's so sweet.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Caroline that Danielle is coming to the Brownstone for the charity event. Caroline is skeptical about why Danielle is going. I am, too!!
See you next week!
TERESA
Teresa wakes her husband up because she is feeling a lot of pressure "down there." So she knows she's in labor and takes about 2 hours to get ready to go to the hospital. She's packing make-up, clothes, jewelry, etc. She's reading email, making french toast for her daughter and calling friends. Seriously the woman has 4 bags. Who is she??
At the hospital, she's applying make-up. She's so late, they gave away her room. Joe tells her he wants 3 more kids. Teresa says that she's done. He can have the next one. HA! She finally gets a room and is horrified by the gown she has to wear. She wants to wear her own.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Christopher that his friend, "the car wash guy" is in town. So he comes up to meet Chris because, as Caroline tells us, they don't have a car wash to put Chris into, so all they can do is hook them up with one of their friends who has one. I don't know why, but Chris just seems so slimy - like a used car salesman.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters are having dinner. Christine is such a smart girl...it's a shame Danielle is her mother. Christine knows that the modeling industry is a tough industry to make it in. Danielle interviews that Christine asked her not to talk about what happened at the fashion show when she almost threw up and fainted. So, of course, Danielle tells us about it again. Christine says that she'll understand if she doesn't make it. She'll know it was because the industry just wasn't ready for her. Jillian says "and you weren't ready for it" and Christine gets annoyed and quiet. Jillian is a smart girl. Danielle is clueless and doesn't understand what just happened.
TERESA
Teresa is in labor and making calls to everyone. She's even got phone calls on the room phone. She asks Joe what he's going to get her for having this kid. She thinks diamonds are appropriate. He says he'll go to Africa to get them and Teresa is surprised that they have diamonds in Africa. Wow. It's like she lives under a rock. She is getting an epidural and she cries a little, then she immediately gets concerned that her make-up is all messed up. OY!
JACQUELINE
Ashley comes over to apologize for freaking out on her mom last time she was over. Jacqueline says that she just worries about Ashley. Jacqueline asks Ashley if she'd be interested in seeing a Life Coach. Ashley thinks it's a dumb idea because she already has a plan. Her plan is to take a year off, then go to junior college in the spring and transfer to a four-year college in the fall. She has no idea what she wants to study or where. But she has a plan, y'all.
CAROLINE
Chris goes to a strip club to meet up with the manager because he really wants to do his strip club/car wash business. The manager tells him that it's not a "strip club", it's a gentleman's club. Oh Lord! He tells Chris to get the "feel" for a gentleman's club. Um, he's not even 21. Albie shows up with his buddy, Frank. Who are these people??
TERESA
She's screaming like a banshee. It's a GIRL!!! Teresa sounds like Fran Dresher. The baby name is Audriana. She's really cute.
JACQUELINE
She and Chris have a glass of wine. She wants to talk about Ashley. She tells him about the Life Coach idea and Chris starts laughing. He says that when he was growing up, it was a beating. Dina interviews that a wooden spoon is a much more effective coach. There's a HUGE safe in the room and she insists on seeing what is inside. It's like an arsenal. INSANE and terrifying.
DANIELLE
Danielle goes to a diner to meet her friend, Kathy. Kathy tells Danielle that the owner of the diner has a baby who has cancer. So he's having a fundraiser for her daughter and wants Danielle to come to support the baby. Danielle says that she will absolutely be at the fundraiser and do whatever she can for the baby. She finds out that the event is at the Brownstone. She "claims" that she doesn't want to go to the Brownstone but she will go there for this baby. (insert eyeroll here).
DINA
Caroline and Jacqueline meet up with Dina because she wants to talk to them. Dina tells them that she needs to talk to Danielle - in person - to tell her that she doesn't want her in her life anymore. Caroline and Jacqueline don't understand why she needs to meet with Danielle to "tell" her this. I agree. I always think it's weird when girls "break up" with their friends. If you don't want to talk to someone or have them in your life anymore, then just stop. That's all you have to do! It's just so dramatic. I think it's unnecessary, but maybe Dina just needs that for closure.
CAROLINE
Chris is working for the day at the family friend's car wash. Rick leaves Chris in charge for the day to see how he does. Chris's first action is to bring in the skanks...er...girls. They put on the T-Shirts and try to bring in business with their daisy dukes and tight shirts. It works!! Caroline stops by to check in on Chris and she is a little concerned about all the girls. She meets "Bianca" outside and then walks inside and meets a "Bianca" look-a-like, "Nicole". Rick shows up at the end of the day and he's in SHOCK! He says he wouldn't have brought in the girls, but he's SO EXCITED by the huge amount of business!! This may not be such a bad idea after all.
DANIELLE
Danielle is at her friend, Danny's house. Danny is an ex-con who is on parole. John is Danny's thug friend and he's there, too. Danielle tells him about her rift with the Manzo's. John and Danny are both ex-felons. Danielle is just creating drama for herself. She asks Danny and John to escort her to the Brownstone event because she's afraid of something going down. Are you kidding? What are they going to do to Danielle at a charity event?? It's so ridiculous. She's so dramatic. They agree and Danielle tells us "When Danny takes my back, people better be listening." Get over yourself! Seriously??
DINA
Dina brings a GINORMOUS teddy bear for baby Audriana. She's super cute. She's got a knit cap with a huge flower on it. Teresa is in leopard print pajamas. Teresa asks Dina to be Audriana's godmother. Dina gets all emotional. It's so sweet.
CAROLINE
Albert tells Caroline that Danielle is coming to the Brownstone for the charity event. Caroline is skeptical about why Danielle is going. I am, too!!
See you next week!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Real Housewives of New York - Season 3 - Episode 12
"Sun, Sand & Psychosis"
RAMONA
The ladies are rehashing the previous night's events on the Hooter's boat. Apparently, Ramona walked up to a Hooter's girl and told her that she needed to go to college. HA! The conversation moves to Bethenny and Kelly's argument and Kelly calls Bethenny a "cook" again and says that she's not a "chef." Bethenny asks Kelly to define a "chef" for her. Kelly says that a chef works in a restaurant or is hired as one - like those on the yacht. Bethenny says that she's been hired as a chef and Kelly says she has no idea what Bethenny does. So Bethenny, rightly so, tells her not to say anything if she doesn't know what the F*** she is talking about! Kelly still keeps talking and Bethenny finally tells her to stop. Everyone at the table sees that Kelly is the one who started the attack and tells her to stop. Kelly doesn't know what's going on (as usual) and Bethenny tells Kelly that no one understands what she's saying. Kelly: "Ok. Satchels of gold." WTF? Just then Alex breaks the awkwardness and tells Bethenny that Simon is making chocolate waffles for the boys and asks Bethenny's advice about adding more cocoa. Kelly mocks "Great timing" and Bethenny gets up and walks over to the couch. She's had it. It's too much stress and drama for her.
Ramona is super excited to show the girls their next stop. They are leaving the yacht and staying in a huge home on the island. It's absolutely breathtaking. The house is amazing.
Bethenny put together "gift bags" for everyone with their initials on the bag and a bunch of beach stuff in it. It was a thoughtful gesture. Of course, Kelly thinks it's creepy and doesn't understand why Bethenny would give her this bag. Kelly bitches that it's impersonal because the bag is a Skinny Girl bag and has some of Bethenny's products in it. Jeez. It's a free gift bag. Just be grateful and STFU! Kelly starts to break down. She cries and calls Jill and tells her it "creeps her out" that Bethenny's dad died and she's on the trip. And, she says that she's been having nightmares that Bethenny is trying to kill her. OMG. DRAMA. Kelly is seriously losing her mind. Wow. Mental break. Even Jill is wondering what is going on because she can't understand Kelly.
The next morning, Bethenny is cooking some breakfast. Kelly comes into the kitchen and brings a pad of paper. She tells them that it's better to write down complaints rather than talk about them. Good Lord. Kelly announces that she wants to take everyone's picture on the beach and do a mini photo shoot. Kelly is into photography now - even though she doesn't know how to use a camera. Bethenny decides to hang back and relax by herself. I'd don't blame her. These bitches are WHACK!
THE PHOTO SHOOT ON THE BEACH
Kelly is taking pictures and she is all about criticizing Alex. Although, in Kelly's defense, Alex does look a little weird. She's so serious. This whole thing is weird. And Kelly yelling "Johann face, Alex. Baby face." was a little much.
JILL
Jill is in a skating dress and she's practicing ice skating with Johnny Weir. One of the coaches starts yelling at Jill because there are professional ice skaters trying to practice and she's got her amateur ass all over the ice. HAHA!!
Jill and Luann have lunch and Jill tells her about Kelly calling her like a crazy woman. They both warned her not to go. Jill says that she would never go somewhere she wasn't welcome. Famous last words. She tells Luann that she found out that the girls are coming back from their trip on Tuesday and she's going to St. Bart's on Monday. So she's thinking of surprising Ramona on Monday before heading to St. Bart's. Luann thinks it's a bad idea since they aren't expecting her. Jill isn't hearing it and decides to go for it. BAD IDEA. Luann says she won't go rescue Jill if she needs it! :)
BETHENNY
Bethenny's gift to Ramona is a dinner for everyone. She's busy cooking in the kitchen while the ladies are outside enjoying cocktails. Kelly gets a call from her daughters and is yapping in front of everyone. Ramona asks her to talk in the house and move away from the group. Kelly takes it as an attack on her daughters and goes batshit again. Wow.
They have cocktails and appetizers. Bethenny goes into the kitchen to prepare the food and tells her staff that it's more fun in the kitchen that out there with Krazy! Krazy says she doesn't want to sit across from Bethenny and she overhears and tells Krazy that she doesn't need to do anything she doesn't want to do. Sonja tells Krazy not to be paranoid.
Bethenny brings out salad with crabcakes. Of course, Krazy doesn't like the crabcakes and says that Bethenny's food is not really that good. BUT she likes the salad dressing and tells us that Bethenny could be like Paul Newman and make dressing. OY VEY! Ramona doesn't want Bethenny to know that someone didn't eat her food, so Sonja eats Krazy's crabcake. Steak comes out next and Kelly's has a string in it. So, Bethenny takes it back to the kitchen and gets her another piece of steak. They sit and eat and Sonja compliments Bethenny on the 5 star meal. She says that she knows food because she used to have a 5 star chef on her boat. Krazy leans over and says "we know about your past." WTF?? Krazy took some serious crazy pills before dinner. She is on fire.
Ramona comments that she hasn't heard from Jill this whole trip and Krazy says that all Jill has asked about is Bethenny. Krazy just keeps going and lashing out at everyone. They all get quiet and Ramona says that she and Bethenny had an altercation on the Brooklyn Bridge and she wants to talk to Bethenny about it. Krazy can't keep her trap shut, so she asks if Ramona is going to "make out with tongue" with Bethenny. Seriously, WTF?? Ramona gives Krazy a time out and tells her to shut up. Krazy just keeps saying "You made Bethenny cry" over and over. Ramona takes Bethenny inside and Krazy says "Yeah, you guys go have an intimate moment." She and Spencer Pratt need their own show.
Bethenny feels vindicated for everything she's ever said about Krazy. Sonja and Alex are trying to calm Krazy down and she's just not getting it. They explain that Ramona and Bethenny are just talking about their issues and feelings and Krazy rolls her eyes and says that this is "too 1979" for her because they are talking about feelings again. Krazy tells Alex that she needs to relax more and Alex admits that she was nervous about getting in front of the camera for Krazy earlier that afternoon. Krazy laughs and says that Alex is having nightmares about her while she's having nightmares about Bethenny. Alex tells her to take it down a notch with the drama and that she was NOT having "nightmares" about anyone. She was just a little nervous. OMG. Krazy really goes nuts here and says that she threw up the night before she came because she's been having nightmares about Bethenny killing her because she's tried to kill Krazy so many times before. WTF?? I wish there was something bigger than "all caps" to stress how FUCKING BIZARRE this whole thing is. Alex asks when these attempted murders occurred and Krazy does the sign of the cross and starts to cry a little. OMG. She and Spencer Pratt need straight jackets and FAST!
Bethenny comes back and sits down and asks what's going on and Sonja says that it's hard to follow the conversation and points at Krazy. Krazy says that Alex is possessed and gives the example from Ramona's party when she delivered her "message" to Jill. Then she tells Alex to "zip it" which she's been saying to people all night. So Bethenny gives Krazy her full attention and she describes the situation that night while Ramona stands behind her gesturing at how loco Krazy is. Alex, Bethenny and Ramona go inside and Sonja is upset that she got left outside to deal with Krazy.
Sonja was trying to talk sense into Krazy. It's no use. Krazy goes on a tirade to Sonja about how Bethenny allegedly goes after her EVERY DAY in the press and tries to defame her and her kids. Ok, I read A LOT of celebrity gossip on a daily basis. Just to give you a small indication, after I check my email in the morning, I read perezhilton.com, people.com, eonline.com, thesuperficial.com, gawker.com, and ew.com (entertainment weekly).... to name a few. I also check these sites periodically throughout the day. I have not read things about Kelly on a daily basis and I've never read anything about her children. She's delusional...no one cares about you Krazy!!
Krazy asks Sonja how she can just sit there with Bethenny after she called Sonja a hooker (it was a joke. Sonja said she used to work in a restaurant and Bethenny asked if she was a hooker). Sonja tries to explain to Krazy what a joke is, but Krazy can't follow. The others walk back out to join the lunacy.
Bethenny tells Krazy that she wants to hear the truth from her. Then she mocks "you can't handle the truth" and Krazy doesn't get the reference. Krazy: "Oh my god. AL SHARPTON. AL SHARPTON!!! Put your hair up!! It's Al Sharpton!" No you dingbat - it's Jack Nicholson from A Few Good Men. Who doesn't know that? And what the hell is up with Al Sharpton??? WTF? Now the other girls are getting concerned. It's no longer a joke that Kelly is crazy. They seriously think that she's having some sort of breakdown and that there is something really wrong with her. She's not making any sense and the mood turns from "OMG, she's crazy" to "ok, she's really losing it and I'm worried." Kelly excuses herself from the table. On her way out, she asks why Bethenny attacked her friend, Gwyneth, in the paper. You know, her "friend," Gwyneth Paltrow?? Wow. DELUSIONAL and PARANOID. If I cared, I'd try to diagnose her but I'm content to just call her Krazy for now.
Two minutes later, Krazy walks back out asking if anyone wants a jelly bean or lollipop. Bethenny tells Krazy that they are all worried about her because she's crazy. Krazy just responds that she doesn't like Bethenny and that she thinks it's creepy that Bethenny's dad died and she's on the trip. Kelly tells Bethenny that she threw up because she thinks Bethenny is trying to kill her. So Bethenny yells at her to go to sleep because she's CRAZY. Sonja tells Bethenny not to be mean to her because she actually is crazy and they have to stop picking on her. The situation turns sad and Alex says that they all have to stop because there's a real problem. Everyone backs off. Bethenny actually does a good job of diffusing the situation. She tells Krazy that she doesn't want to ruin her life or talk about her in the press and she's not attacking her. Kelly says thank you and seems to relax for the night. HOLY KRAZY LADY!!!
See you next week.
RAMONA
The ladies are rehashing the previous night's events on the Hooter's boat. Apparently, Ramona walked up to a Hooter's girl and told her that she needed to go to college. HA! The conversation moves to Bethenny and Kelly's argument and Kelly calls Bethenny a "cook" again and says that she's not a "chef." Bethenny asks Kelly to define a "chef" for her. Kelly says that a chef works in a restaurant or is hired as one - like those on the yacht. Bethenny says that she's been hired as a chef and Kelly says she has no idea what Bethenny does. So Bethenny, rightly so, tells her not to say anything if she doesn't know what the F*** she is talking about! Kelly still keeps talking and Bethenny finally tells her to stop. Everyone at the table sees that Kelly is the one who started the attack and tells her to stop. Kelly doesn't know what's going on (as usual) and Bethenny tells Kelly that no one understands what she's saying. Kelly: "Ok. Satchels of gold." WTF? Just then Alex breaks the awkwardness and tells Bethenny that Simon is making chocolate waffles for the boys and asks Bethenny's advice about adding more cocoa. Kelly mocks "Great timing" and Bethenny gets up and walks over to the couch. She's had it. It's too much stress and drama for her.
Ramona is super excited to show the girls their next stop. They are leaving the yacht and staying in a huge home on the island. It's absolutely breathtaking. The house is amazing.
Bethenny put together "gift bags" for everyone with their initials on the bag and a bunch of beach stuff in it. It was a thoughtful gesture. Of course, Kelly thinks it's creepy and doesn't understand why Bethenny would give her this bag. Kelly bitches that it's impersonal because the bag is a Skinny Girl bag and has some of Bethenny's products in it. Jeez. It's a free gift bag. Just be grateful and STFU! Kelly starts to break down. She cries and calls Jill and tells her it "creeps her out" that Bethenny's dad died and she's on the trip. And, she says that she's been having nightmares that Bethenny is trying to kill her. OMG. DRAMA. Kelly is seriously losing her mind. Wow. Mental break. Even Jill is wondering what is going on because she can't understand Kelly.
The next morning, Bethenny is cooking some breakfast. Kelly comes into the kitchen and brings a pad of paper. She tells them that it's better to write down complaints rather than talk about them. Good Lord. Kelly announces that she wants to take everyone's picture on the beach and do a mini photo shoot. Kelly is into photography now - even though she doesn't know how to use a camera. Bethenny decides to hang back and relax by herself. I'd don't blame her. These bitches are WHACK!
THE PHOTO SHOOT ON THE BEACH
Kelly is taking pictures and she is all about criticizing Alex. Although, in Kelly's defense, Alex does look a little weird. She's so serious. This whole thing is weird. And Kelly yelling "Johann face, Alex. Baby face." was a little much.
JILL
Jill is in a skating dress and she's practicing ice skating with Johnny Weir. One of the coaches starts yelling at Jill because there are professional ice skaters trying to practice and she's got her amateur ass all over the ice. HAHA!!
Jill and Luann have lunch and Jill tells her about Kelly calling her like a crazy woman. They both warned her not to go. Jill says that she would never go somewhere she wasn't welcome. Famous last words. She tells Luann that she found out that the girls are coming back from their trip on Tuesday and she's going to St. Bart's on Monday. So she's thinking of surprising Ramona on Monday before heading to St. Bart's. Luann thinks it's a bad idea since they aren't expecting her. Jill isn't hearing it and decides to go for it. BAD IDEA. Luann says she won't go rescue Jill if she needs it! :)
BETHENNY
Bethenny's gift to Ramona is a dinner for everyone. She's busy cooking in the kitchen while the ladies are outside enjoying cocktails. Kelly gets a call from her daughters and is yapping in front of everyone. Ramona asks her to talk in the house and move away from the group. Kelly takes it as an attack on her daughters and goes batshit again. Wow.
They have cocktails and appetizers. Bethenny goes into the kitchen to prepare the food and tells her staff that it's more fun in the kitchen that out there with Krazy! Krazy says she doesn't want to sit across from Bethenny and she overhears and tells Krazy that she doesn't need to do anything she doesn't want to do. Sonja tells Krazy not to be paranoid.
Bethenny brings out salad with crabcakes. Of course, Krazy doesn't like the crabcakes and says that Bethenny's food is not really that good. BUT she likes the salad dressing and tells us that Bethenny could be like Paul Newman and make dressing. OY VEY! Ramona doesn't want Bethenny to know that someone didn't eat her food, so Sonja eats Krazy's crabcake. Steak comes out next and Kelly's has a string in it. So, Bethenny takes it back to the kitchen and gets her another piece of steak. They sit and eat and Sonja compliments Bethenny on the 5 star meal. She says that she knows food because she used to have a 5 star chef on her boat. Krazy leans over and says "we know about your past." WTF?? Krazy took some serious crazy pills before dinner. She is on fire.
Ramona comments that she hasn't heard from Jill this whole trip and Krazy says that all Jill has asked about is Bethenny. Krazy just keeps going and lashing out at everyone. They all get quiet and Ramona says that she and Bethenny had an altercation on the Brooklyn Bridge and she wants to talk to Bethenny about it. Krazy can't keep her trap shut, so she asks if Ramona is going to "make out with tongue" with Bethenny. Seriously, WTF?? Ramona gives Krazy a time out and tells her to shut up. Krazy just keeps saying "You made Bethenny cry" over and over. Ramona takes Bethenny inside and Krazy says "Yeah, you guys go have an intimate moment." She and Spencer Pratt need their own show.
Bethenny feels vindicated for everything she's ever said about Krazy. Sonja and Alex are trying to calm Krazy down and she's just not getting it. They explain that Ramona and Bethenny are just talking about their issues and feelings and Krazy rolls her eyes and says that this is "too 1979" for her because they are talking about feelings again. Krazy tells Alex that she needs to relax more and Alex admits that she was nervous about getting in front of the camera for Krazy earlier that afternoon. Krazy laughs and says that Alex is having nightmares about her while she's having nightmares about Bethenny. Alex tells her to take it down a notch with the drama and that she was NOT having "nightmares" about anyone. She was just a little nervous. OMG. Krazy really goes nuts here and says that she threw up the night before she came because she's been having nightmares about Bethenny killing her because she's tried to kill Krazy so many times before. WTF?? I wish there was something bigger than "all caps" to stress how FUCKING BIZARRE this whole thing is. Alex asks when these attempted murders occurred and Krazy does the sign of the cross and starts to cry a little. OMG. She and Spencer Pratt need straight jackets and FAST!
Bethenny comes back and sits down and asks what's going on and Sonja says that it's hard to follow the conversation and points at Krazy. Krazy says that Alex is possessed and gives the example from Ramona's party when she delivered her "message" to Jill. Then she tells Alex to "zip it" which she's been saying to people all night. So Bethenny gives Krazy her full attention and she describes the situation that night while Ramona stands behind her gesturing at how loco Krazy is. Alex, Bethenny and Ramona go inside and Sonja is upset that she got left outside to deal with Krazy.
Sonja was trying to talk sense into Krazy. It's no use. Krazy goes on a tirade to Sonja about how Bethenny allegedly goes after her EVERY DAY in the press and tries to defame her and her kids. Ok, I read A LOT of celebrity gossip on a daily basis. Just to give you a small indication, after I check my email in the morning, I read perezhilton.com, people.com, eonline.com, thesuperficial.com, gawker.com, and ew.com (entertainment weekly).... to name a few. I also check these sites periodically throughout the day. I have not read things about Kelly on a daily basis and I've never read anything about her children. She's delusional...no one cares about you Krazy!!
Krazy asks Sonja how she can just sit there with Bethenny after she called Sonja a hooker (it was a joke. Sonja said she used to work in a restaurant and Bethenny asked if she was a hooker). Sonja tries to explain to Krazy what a joke is, but Krazy can't follow. The others walk back out to join the lunacy.
Bethenny tells Krazy that she wants to hear the truth from her. Then she mocks "you can't handle the truth" and Krazy doesn't get the reference. Krazy: "Oh my god. AL SHARPTON. AL SHARPTON!!! Put your hair up!! It's Al Sharpton!" No you dingbat - it's Jack Nicholson from A Few Good Men. Who doesn't know that? And what the hell is up with Al Sharpton??? WTF? Now the other girls are getting concerned. It's no longer a joke that Kelly is crazy. They seriously think that she's having some sort of breakdown and that there is something really wrong with her. She's not making any sense and the mood turns from "OMG, she's crazy" to "ok, she's really losing it and I'm worried." Kelly excuses herself from the table. On her way out, she asks why Bethenny attacked her friend, Gwyneth, in the paper. You know, her "friend," Gwyneth Paltrow?? Wow. DELUSIONAL and PARANOID. If I cared, I'd try to diagnose her but I'm content to just call her Krazy for now.
Two minutes later, Krazy walks back out asking if anyone wants a jelly bean or lollipop. Bethenny tells Krazy that they are all worried about her because she's crazy. Krazy just responds that she doesn't like Bethenny and that she thinks it's creepy that Bethenny's dad died and she's on the trip. Kelly tells Bethenny that she threw up because she thinks Bethenny is trying to kill her. So Bethenny yells at her to go to sleep because she's CRAZY. Sonja tells Bethenny not to be mean to her because she actually is crazy and they have to stop picking on her. The situation turns sad and Alex says that they all have to stop because there's a real problem. Everyone backs off. Bethenny actually does a good job of diffusing the situation. She tells Krazy that she doesn't want to ruin her life or talk about her in the press and she's not attacking her. Kelly says thank you and seems to relax for the night. HOLY KRAZY LADY!!!
See you next week.
The Hills, Season 6, Episode 4
"This is Goodbye"
SHE-PRATT/HOLLY
The sisters-in-law commiserate about Real Doll and Sponge Bob. She-Pratt says that they have completely isolated themselves and have no friends and no family. Holly just misses her sister. :(
REAL DOLL
Kristin and Real Doll meet for lunch. Real Doll looks like a porn star, which I'm guessing is the point. Kristin tells Real Doll that Sponge Bob has lost his mind and that he's scary. Kristin doesn't sugar coat it. No bullshit. But Real Doll defends her choice to stay with him because he's all she's got left. She's completely isolated herself from her friends and family. She even says "Who am I without Spencer?" Sad.
AUDRINA
Audrina visits Ryan Cabrera at the recording studio so that we remember that he used to be a singer. She tells him that she and her new bff, Kristin, want to set up a party with everyone at Wonderland. Ryan Cabrera thinks that won't be so fun for him and decides to pass. Loser.
WONDERLAND
Brody and his boys are there with Kristin, She-Pratt and Audrina. Brody pulls Audrina aside to chat about stuff. She cuts him off and tells him that she just repaired her friendship with Kristin and doesn't want to ruin that AND she has a boyfriend. Brody is disappointed and Kristin stares at them with a pathetic scared look. Don't worry, Kristin. Audrina just blew him off, so you can be Brody's sloppy seconds now. Sponge Bob and Charlie show up and shock everyone! Kristin tries to say hello, but Sponge Bob just ignores her.
Brody talks to Sponge Bob and tells him that he misses hanging out with him. He tells Sponge Bob to come hang with the boys more often. Brody tells him that he can tell Sponge Bob isn't happy in his life right now. The whole time, Sponge Bob is on the verge of tears. I swear Sponge Bob is on some serious drugs. He is not normal. Brody calls Audrina over to him and Sponge Bob and she walks over and asks Sponge Bob where Real Doll is. Sponge Bob: "You are the lamest f-ing girl in this club right now." WTF? Audrina just walks away. He has seriously lost it.
Brody gets in Sponge Bob's face and tells him he's crazy. Sponge Bob has tears rolling down his face and tells Brody to walk away. Then he announces that people don't know how dangerous he is. LOCO!
SHE-PRATT/AUDRINA
Audrina says that Real Doll called her and Kristin and wants to meet them for lunch because she needs to talk to someone. They both discuss how awful Sponge Bob look and how angry he has gotten. Audrina says that something is very wrong and hopefully, Real Doll will talk to her about it at lunch.
KRISTIN/AUDRINA
They meet up and talk about Sponge Bob going nuts on everyone at Wonderland. Kristin says that he's just so extreme lately and that he's gone off the deep end. She also tells Audrina that she met with Real Doll recently and she's off in Spencerland.
Real Doll walks in and Audrina immediately brings up Wonderland and says that Sponge Bob owes her an apology. Real Doll defends him repeatedly while Kristin and Audrina bring up more examples of his craziness. Then Real Doll says "all guys are a little controlling and you if don't think that, you're wrong." Um, that is SO not true. In fact, I know many women who are the ones in control in their relationships. Real Doll goes on to say that they don't know her and Sponge Bob didn't change her, she changed herself. She says that she doesn't have time or energy and that's why she's cut people off. Eek.
VOYEUR
The gang is partying it up. Lo and Stacie the Bartender are with the group this time. AND...wait for it ... the Pratts walk in!! They ignore everyone and sit down. Kristin sits with Real Doll and Real Doll is showing her the "genius" crystal which opens your mind and makes you smart. Clearly that one isn't working. Everyone comments how strange and creepy Real Doll and Sponge Bob are. Sponge Bob tells Kristin that he doesn't let Real Doll watch TV or go on the Internet or read magazines. She can only read books. Real Doll needs a serious intervention ... wait, I don't really care about Real Doll. Nevermind, let them be crazy and alone. Kristin and Brody have enough and leave.
KRISTIN
Brody and Kristin obviously slept together and she's in her kitchen making them coffee. Brody walks out in one of her T-shirts. They discuss how drunk they both were and then go back to bed. Nice.
LATER THAT AFTERNOON AT KRISTIN'S
Audrina, Kristin, Lo, She-Pratt and Holly all get together and talk about what to do about the Pratts. She-Pratt gets defensive and thinks Real Doll is manipulative and Holly feels defensive
and thinks Sponge Bob is the controlling one. Bottom line - neither of them is the victim. They are both insane. Everyone agrees that they have no one but themselves anymore. She-Pratt starts and says that she's cutting them out of her life. Kristin and Audrina feel they've done all they can and they are cutting the Pratts out, too. Lo concurs. They all look at Holly and she starts crying because Real Doll is her baby sister and she was there when Real Doll was born. It's the greatest loss for her. She-Pratt and Sponge Bob never really got along and he's always kind of been a jerk to her. The other three are just friends. But Holly is losing her only sister and her best friend. It's incredibly sad.
See you next time.
SHE-PRATT/HOLLY
The sisters-in-law commiserate about Real Doll and Sponge Bob. She-Pratt says that they have completely isolated themselves and have no friends and no family. Holly just misses her sister. :(
REAL DOLL
Kristin and Real Doll meet for lunch. Real Doll looks like a porn star, which I'm guessing is the point. Kristin tells Real Doll that Sponge Bob has lost his mind and that he's scary. Kristin doesn't sugar coat it. No bullshit. But Real Doll defends her choice to stay with him because he's all she's got left. She's completely isolated herself from her friends and family. She even says "Who am I without Spencer?" Sad.
AUDRINA
Audrina visits Ryan Cabrera at the recording studio so that we remember that he used to be a singer. She tells him that she and her new bff, Kristin, want to set up a party with everyone at Wonderland. Ryan Cabrera thinks that won't be so fun for him and decides to pass. Loser.
WONDERLAND
Brody and his boys are there with Kristin, She-Pratt and Audrina. Brody pulls Audrina aside to chat about stuff. She cuts him off and tells him that she just repaired her friendship with Kristin and doesn't want to ruin that AND she has a boyfriend. Brody is disappointed and Kristin stares at them with a pathetic scared look. Don't worry, Kristin. Audrina just blew him off, so you can be Brody's sloppy seconds now. Sponge Bob and Charlie show up and shock everyone! Kristin tries to say hello, but Sponge Bob just ignores her.
Brody talks to Sponge Bob and tells him that he misses hanging out with him. He tells Sponge Bob to come hang with the boys more often. Brody tells him that he can tell Sponge Bob isn't happy in his life right now. The whole time, Sponge Bob is on the verge of tears. I swear Sponge Bob is on some serious drugs. He is not normal. Brody calls Audrina over to him and Sponge Bob and she walks over and asks Sponge Bob where Real Doll is. Sponge Bob: "You are the lamest f-ing girl in this club right now." WTF? Audrina just walks away. He has seriously lost it.
Brody gets in Sponge Bob's face and tells him he's crazy. Sponge Bob has tears rolling down his face and tells Brody to walk away. Then he announces that people don't know how dangerous he is. LOCO!
SHE-PRATT/AUDRINA
Audrina says that Real Doll called her and Kristin and wants to meet them for lunch because she needs to talk to someone. They both discuss how awful Sponge Bob look and how angry he has gotten. Audrina says that something is very wrong and hopefully, Real Doll will talk to her about it at lunch.
KRISTIN/AUDRINA
They meet up and talk about Sponge Bob going nuts on everyone at Wonderland. Kristin says that he's just so extreme lately and that he's gone off the deep end. She also tells Audrina that she met with Real Doll recently and she's off in Spencerland.
Real Doll walks in and Audrina immediately brings up Wonderland and says that Sponge Bob owes her an apology. Real Doll defends him repeatedly while Kristin and Audrina bring up more examples of his craziness. Then Real Doll says "all guys are a little controlling and you if don't think that, you're wrong." Um, that is SO not true. In fact, I know many women who are the ones in control in their relationships. Real Doll goes on to say that they don't know her and Sponge Bob didn't change her, she changed herself. She says that she doesn't have time or energy and that's why she's cut people off. Eek.
VOYEUR
The gang is partying it up. Lo and Stacie the Bartender are with the group this time. AND...wait for it ... the Pratts walk in!! They ignore everyone and sit down. Kristin sits with Real Doll and Real Doll is showing her the "genius" crystal which opens your mind and makes you smart. Clearly that one isn't working. Everyone comments how strange and creepy Real Doll and Sponge Bob are. Sponge Bob tells Kristin that he doesn't let Real Doll watch TV or go on the Internet or read magazines. She can only read books. Real Doll needs a serious intervention ... wait, I don't really care about Real Doll. Nevermind, let them be crazy and alone. Kristin and Brody have enough and leave.
KRISTIN
Brody and Kristin obviously slept together and she's in her kitchen making them coffee. Brody walks out in one of her T-shirts. They discuss how drunk they both were and then go back to bed. Nice.
LATER THAT AFTERNOON AT KRISTIN'S
Audrina, Kristin, Lo, She-Pratt and Holly all get together and talk about what to do about the Pratts. She-Pratt gets defensive and thinks Real Doll is manipulative and Holly feels defensive
and thinks Sponge Bob is the controlling one. Bottom line - neither of them is the victim. They are both insane. Everyone agrees that they have no one but themselves anymore. She-Pratt starts and says that she's cutting them out of her life. Kristin and Audrina feel they've done all they can and they are cutting the Pratts out, too. Lo concurs. They all look at Holly and she starts crying because Real Doll is her baby sister and she was there when Real Doll was born. It's the greatest loss for her. She-Pratt and Sponge Bob never really got along and he's always kind of been a jerk to her. The other three are just friends. But Holly is losing her only sister and her best friend. It's incredibly sad.
See you next time.
The City, Season 3, Episode 4
"Queen of Diamonds"
ELLE MAGAZINE
Erin, Olivia and a bunch of editors are all talking to Joe Zee about the "Fergie" Cover. Olivia pulls out some great accessories, the team has great looks and everything is good to go! Joe asks Olivia to hang back for a second. He tells her that her work was good this morning, but she needs to be consistent. He tells her he can't bring her to LA and she understands why. HA!
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Roxy and Whitney are looking through magazine for inspiration for Whitney's look book. Whitney says that the French photographer from the Ruelala shoot sent her the pics and then asked her to get a drink or dinner. Kelly walks up and Whit fills her in. Kelly says that everyone should have an affair with a French guy, especially if you're in fashion. "It's a great way to learn the language and a great way to get banged." :)
ELLE
Robbie's assistant comes to Olivia to pick up some accessories for a black tie affair that Robbie is attending. He asks Olivia why she isn't in LA and Olivia lies and says that she had no intention of going to LA because she has "too much work" to do at the office. Yeah right! No, I don't want to meet Fergie. I'd rather stay in my office and work. Stupid.
LA
The Elle team arrives at the L'Ermitage Hotel in LA. Erin meets Joe for coffee in the morning and the conversation turns to Olivia. Joe says she's good at pulling accessories together for a look. Erin says that might be true, but that's not enough. It's a whole job, not just getting a ring for one look. Erin says they now have to worry that she won't even show up. Joe promises that will NEVER happen again. Joe tries to defend Olivia and Erin just says "the bad far outweighs the good." I could not agree more.
WHITNEY'S APARTMENT
Whitney comes out of her room in a white sparkly dress and black leggings. WHAT? Jonathon, her date, shows up on his motorcycle and even brought an extra helmet for Whitney. She's a little freaked out because she's never been on one, but decides to go for it. They sit down and grab drinks and they start talking war photography. Jonathon is a very serious guy. Whitney mentions that she needs a photographer to shoot her look book and Jonathon says he'll do it.
FERGIE ELLE SHOOT
Joe and Erin show Fergie all the looks and she loves them. She tells Joe her favorite piece is a huge dragon ring (that I'm sure Olivia picked out). Erin rolls her eyes. They are watching the shoot and Joe tells Erin that diamonds make the outfit. (Olivia came up with the diamond idea). Erin says that the hot pants make the outfit. Joe says that Olivia can pick out a great piece of jewelry. That's her strength. I'm with Erin...that is NOT enough. Joe and Erin go look at some cover shots. Joe likes the cover with the diamond bracelet, while Erin obviously prefers the other cover. Joe is the boss so he wins!
Erin gets a call from Seth, Robbie's assistant, and he tells her that Olivia has been in the office all day and now she's out to lunch with the new Fashion Director to KISS SOME ASS! Erin is not pleased.
NEW YORK
Olivia and Alexis Bryan Morgan, the new Fashion Director, sit and have lunch. They make small talk and then Alexis asks if Olivia pulled any of the pieces for the Fergie shoot. Olivia tells her that she picked a lot of the Cartier and Bvlgari pieces, but she really wants Fergie to wear the blue dragon ring that she found for her. [Insert eye roll here]. Alexis tells her that she has a good eye and Olivia says that she was fortunate to be educated at a young age about jewelry and vintage pieces. UGH.
OH NOW I SEE. Olivia and Alexis have known each other for years. Great. Alexis asks Olivia how it is to work with Erin. Olivia says it's fine. Alexis tells Olivia that she has to pay her dues if she wants to make it in the fashion industry. She tells Olivia not to be discouraged and Olivia says she's glad that "her friend" is working there now! Alexis tells Olivia to come to her if there's anything she can do. Damn.
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Whitney tells Kelly that Jonathon offered to shoot her look book for FREE. Hmm. That must have been later because he didn't do that in any of the scenes I saw. Kelly says that people don't usually do things for free without expecting something in return. Whitney is not really into him and is hoping that he doesn't want anything from her.
LOS ANGELES
The shoot is over and Erin and Joe are in a car on their way to the hotel. Joe defends his choice for the cover and brings up Olivia AGAIN. Erin stops him and says she can't hear about Olivia anymore today. She says it makes her skin crawl and she's "so OVER Olivia Palermo." Agreed. Joe says that he doesn't need Erin to put her on a pedestal, he just needs her to acknowledge that she did a good job. Erin says "Olivia did a good job today." Done.
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Jonathon arrives to do the look book shoot. Whitney has everything set up and they start shooting. Jonathon is very complimentary to Whitney and Roxy confirms that he's hot for her. He tries to come up and talk to her and ask her out again and Whitney tells him she has no time for a social life right now and would like to keep things professional.
ELLE
It's team meeting time and Joe pulls everyone in to look at the Fergie cover. Olivia whispers to Robbie's assistant that she hopes the Armani outfit made it on the cover (because she pulled the jewelry for it). Joe comes in and tells them that they found the cover. He reminds them that they usually pull several covers together and pass them through focus groups to find the right one. He unveils the cover and it's ... THE ONE ERIN LIKED!!! Joe says that he preferred the Armani outfit with the diamonds, but ultimately, this green dress won out with the focus group. Seth whispers that there isn't even any jewelry in the picture. HAHA! Joe gives Erin props for knowing what the readers would prefer and tells her she did a great job. YAY!! ERIN FTW!!!
Awesome. See you next week.
ELLE MAGAZINE
Erin, Olivia and a bunch of editors are all talking to Joe Zee about the "Fergie" Cover. Olivia pulls out some great accessories, the team has great looks and everything is good to go! Joe asks Olivia to hang back for a second. He tells her that her work was good this morning, but she needs to be consistent. He tells her he can't bring her to LA and she understands why. HA!
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Roxy and Whitney are looking through magazine for inspiration for Whitney's look book. Whitney says that the French photographer from the Ruelala shoot sent her the pics and then asked her to get a drink or dinner. Kelly walks up and Whit fills her in. Kelly says that everyone should have an affair with a French guy, especially if you're in fashion. "It's a great way to learn the language and a great way to get banged." :)
ELLE
Robbie's assistant comes to Olivia to pick up some accessories for a black tie affair that Robbie is attending. He asks Olivia why she isn't in LA and Olivia lies and says that she had no intention of going to LA because she has "too much work" to do at the office. Yeah right! No, I don't want to meet Fergie. I'd rather stay in my office and work. Stupid.
LA
The Elle team arrives at the L'Ermitage Hotel in LA. Erin meets Joe for coffee in the morning and the conversation turns to Olivia. Joe says she's good at pulling accessories together for a look. Erin says that might be true, but that's not enough. It's a whole job, not just getting a ring for one look. Erin says they now have to worry that she won't even show up. Joe promises that will NEVER happen again. Joe tries to defend Olivia and Erin just says "the bad far outweighs the good." I could not agree more.
WHITNEY'S APARTMENT
Whitney comes out of her room in a white sparkly dress and black leggings. WHAT? Jonathon, her date, shows up on his motorcycle and even brought an extra helmet for Whitney. She's a little freaked out because she's never been on one, but decides to go for it. They sit down and grab drinks and they start talking war photography. Jonathon is a very serious guy. Whitney mentions that she needs a photographer to shoot her look book and Jonathon says he'll do it.
FERGIE ELLE SHOOT
Joe and Erin show Fergie all the looks and she loves them. She tells Joe her favorite piece is a huge dragon ring (that I'm sure Olivia picked out). Erin rolls her eyes. They are watching the shoot and Joe tells Erin that diamonds make the outfit. (Olivia came up with the diamond idea). Erin says that the hot pants make the outfit. Joe says that Olivia can pick out a great piece of jewelry. That's her strength. I'm with Erin...that is NOT enough. Joe and Erin go look at some cover shots. Joe likes the cover with the diamond bracelet, while Erin obviously prefers the other cover. Joe is the boss so he wins!
Erin gets a call from Seth, Robbie's assistant, and he tells her that Olivia has been in the office all day and now she's out to lunch with the new Fashion Director to KISS SOME ASS! Erin is not pleased.
NEW YORK
Olivia and Alexis Bryan Morgan, the new Fashion Director, sit and have lunch. They make small talk and then Alexis asks if Olivia pulled any of the pieces for the Fergie shoot. Olivia tells her that she picked a lot of the Cartier and Bvlgari pieces, but she really wants Fergie to wear the blue dragon ring that she found for her. [Insert eye roll here]. Alexis tells her that she has a good eye and Olivia says that she was fortunate to be educated at a young age about jewelry and vintage pieces. UGH.
OH NOW I SEE. Olivia and Alexis have known each other for years. Great. Alexis asks Olivia how it is to work with Erin. Olivia says it's fine. Alexis tells Olivia that she has to pay her dues if she wants to make it in the fashion industry. She tells Olivia not to be discouraged and Olivia says she's glad that "her friend" is working there now! Alexis tells Olivia to come to her if there's anything she can do. Damn.
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Whitney tells Kelly that Jonathon offered to shoot her look book for FREE. Hmm. That must have been later because he didn't do that in any of the scenes I saw. Kelly says that people don't usually do things for free without expecting something in return. Whitney is not really into him and is hoping that he doesn't want anything from her.
LOS ANGELES
The shoot is over and Erin and Joe are in a car on their way to the hotel. Joe defends his choice for the cover and brings up Olivia AGAIN. Erin stops him and says she can't hear about Olivia anymore today. She says it makes her skin crawl and she's "so OVER Olivia Palermo." Agreed. Joe says that he doesn't need Erin to put her on a pedestal, he just needs her to acknowledge that she did a good job. Erin says "Olivia did a good job today." Done.
PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION
Jonathon arrives to do the look book shoot. Whitney has everything set up and they start shooting. Jonathon is very complimentary to Whitney and Roxy confirms that he's hot for her. He tries to come up and talk to her and ask her out again and Whitney tells him she has no time for a social life right now and would like to keep things professional.
ELLE
It's team meeting time and Joe pulls everyone in to look at the Fergie cover. Olivia whispers to Robbie's assistant that she hopes the Armani outfit made it on the cover (because she pulled the jewelry for it). Joe comes in and tells them that they found the cover. He reminds them that they usually pull several covers together and pass them through focus groups to find the right one. He unveils the cover and it's ... THE ONE ERIN LIKED!!! Joe says that he preferred the Armani outfit with the diamonds, but ultimately, this green dress won out with the focus group. Seth whispers that there isn't even any jewelry in the picture. HAHA! Joe gives Erin props for knowing what the readers would prefer and tells her she did a great job. YAY!! ERIN FTW!!!
Awesome. See you next week.
Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 2 - Episode 3
"Catty-Walk"
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and her son, CJ, decide to paint one of his white shirts. Normal people (even those with money) would get a white Hanes T-Shirt for their kid to paint. Not Jacqueline. She and her son are painting one of his white Polo shirts.
DANIELLE
Danielle is a bad mom. There, I said it. She and Jillian (her 11 year old) come home and find a bouquet of flowers with a card that says "Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl. Congratulations!" Rather than comment what a sweet gesture and what pretty flowers, Danielle asks HER DAUGHTER why she thinks Jacqueline sent them. Jillian says that Jacqueline probably sent them because she's proud of Christine. DUH! Danielle wants her daughter to talk shit with her so she asks if Jillian thinks that she sent them because she felt bad about missing the luncheon. Shut up, Danielle. Seriously. Why are you doing this to your CHILD? Leave her alone.
Danielle keeps going and asks Jillian if she should call Jacqueline. Jillian says she doesn't know and, by her look, she doesn't care, either. SHE'S 11! Then, Danielle decides to call and asks Jillian to hang out while she calls. Jillian says that she thinks her mom needs privacy and Danielle says no. WHY ARE YOU BRINGING YOUR KIDS INTO YOUR DRAMA?!?! Jacqueline ignores the call and Danielle leaves a message. THEN, she asks Jillian if she thinks Jacqueline is busy with the baby or just didn't want to pick up. Why would you ask your kid that? Jillian is smart and not insane like her mother so she says that Jacqueline is a normal person, so she's probably busy. Heh. "People are busy."
Danielle is diabolical. She bitches that Jacqueline didn't come to her luncheon and tells Jacqueline that she can tell Christine herself if she's proud of her. SO, Jacqueline sends Christine flowers to tell her how proud she is of her. AND NOW, Danielle bitches because she doesn't know why Jacqueline is sending flowers when she doesn't have a relationship with any of them. WTF? She is insane. I really think she needs a shrink. I'm pretty convinced that she's Borderline and/or Histrionic and for sure Narcissistic.
Then Danielle decides to call Jacqueline AGAIN. This time she says "I think maybe it would be a good idea if you step out of the room" to her daughter. Before she can get to "good idea," Jillian says "ok" and bolts out of there. HAHA. WHY is Danielle calling her AGAIN?? She just left a message. Jeez. Jacqueline ignores the call again and this is Danielle's message:
"Hi Jacqueline. It's Danielle. Um, I have to be quite honest with you. I really was under the impression that you were you're own woman. And I think it's really gonna affect us, going forward until, at least, you're able to perhaps maybe even celebrate my children with me. [WHAT?] And I need to know how we're going to move forward from this if this is always going to stand in the way. It's up to you. I've made the moves. I've reached out and, um, I'm going to leave the rest up to you now. Bye."
I don't even understand what she was saying.
DINA
Dina tells Teresa that Danielle invited her to the "luncheon" for Christine. Dina interviews that she told Danielle when she forgave her that she needed time before they could be friends so she just wants Danielle to back OFF! Teresa doesn't get why Danielle is still in the picture. I agree. Everyone hates her, yet, they all talk about her incessantly. MOVE ON people. Even Dina, who apparently "runs from drama" is confused about what to do about Danielle. It's easy, really. Stop answering her calls and texting with her. It's done...let it die, already.
PS - Dina's cats are creepy.
JACQUELINE
Caroline and Jacqueline are chatting outside and the conversation begins with...who else? Danielle. Ridiculous. Caroline listens to Jacqueline vent and then just asks Jacqueline if Danielle ever acknowledged Nicholas's birth. Card, text, flowers, congratulations, etc? Nope. Nada. Nothing. I'm with Caroline....why are you even thinking about Danielle? Caroline: "I'm not saying my way is the right way, but I don't get the phone calls." LOVE IT!
DANIELLE
Danielle continues on her crusade to take away Christine's moment. First, she tells Jillian to look at pictures of Christine because they are so beautiful. In the next breath, she tells Jillian that she's next because she looks JUST LIKE CHRISTINE. Christine doesn't like the comparison and is probably wondering when she can just be happy for herself instead of sharing her moment with her mom and her sister.
TERESA
I'm embarrassed for Teresa in this scene. Her kids are the most obnoxious, spoiled brats. She spends $2,000 on tacky clothes for Gia while her other kids whine and completely mess up the boutique. I don't want to know any of those kids as teenagers or adults. Teresa tells Gia that she needs to get a job to support her spending. Gia's response: "I'm too pretty to work." Sad.
DINA
Dina confuses me. I think she's pretty and always well put together when she goes out. She seems like the most "normal" of all the Jersey ladies. But her house is completely crowded with tacky, gawdy furniture and decorations. And she's got those weird cats and she has a bird AND NOW she's meeting with an "energist"? WTF? Again, the conversation is centered around Danielle. OY! Dina wants to eliminate all the drama and basically, eliminate Danielle from her life, but she feels mean doing that. The "energist" tells Dina that she needs to tell Danielle to her face that she's done.
DANIELLE
Danielle's dog is disgusting. It's wiping it's ass on the carpet. GROSS. Her realtor, Karin, shows up and Danielle wants to know if she asked Danielle's ex to pay to fix up the house. Karin talks and talks, but bottom line: He's not paying for anything. Danielle whines that her ex hasn't paid for any upkeep on the house, but is insisting she sell the house so he can have his half. Well, that's the way it works. You're divorced. Why should he pay for the upkeep on the house he's not living in?? (Although, it might help get a better sale in the end, but whatever.) Teresa interviews that Danielle should get a job. I agree. I think all those women should get a job! Too much entitlement.
Danielle interviews that her home is worth $2M, but she'll probably only get $1.5M for it. That means her ex will get about $750K from the sale and she'll get "well under $1M. Nice way to treat a person." Are you F-ing kidding me??? I WISH someone would give me $750K so I can buy a house. She's delusional. This is what I'm talking about. ENTITLED. GET A JOB. Danielle decides to take her house off the market until her ex is willing to "fulfill his obligations" and fix up the house. [insert eye roll here]
CAROLINE
Caroline and Albie go to Teresa's house for dinner and to celebrate Gia's upcoming cat walk debut. Teresa says that she and Joe are "old school" but in a cute way. Meaning, he treats her like a 1950's housewife and he acts like the sexist, macho Italian. Yeah, so cute. Wow. Those girls are OUT OF CONTROL. I can't believe they were eating dinner at 8pm.
FASHION WEEK!!
So, Joe is the type of father who likes to tease his kids. But sometimes the teasing is just mean. My dad can be the same way. If you are a really sensitive person, it's hard to be around guys like that. But, if you have a good sense of self and sense of humor, it doesn't bug you. Joe tells Gia that she's going to walk down the "ugly runway" because she's so ugly. Ok, that's just mean. It's a little beyond just teasing. Teresa's response: "Gia is very sensitive." Yeah, that's the problem. Jeez. Teresa and Joe can't figure out why Gia is crying. Gia says "Dad is mean." Teresa: "Ok, Gia stop." Really? Your husband just called your daughter ugly, her feelings are hurt and all you have say is "Gia stop"? Who is this woman? Gia and Teresa get out of the car and Teresa tells her that her dad was just kidding. Terrible.
DANIELLE
Danielle, Christine and Jillian arrive at IMG to meet with Christine's agent and a walking coach, Mac Folkes. Well, what do you know, Christine is a normal 15 year old. She doesn't really care about doing the perfect "walk," but she tries. Danielle is shouting out critiques which is dumb because Danielle is NO MODEL. She looks like she's next in line to be the cat lady. Christine finally gets annoyed and decides she's done practicing.
DINA
OMG. I just lost a little respect for Dina. Her energist decides to do some "smudging" with her before she leaves. "Smudging" is when you burn dry sage to get rid of the negative energy. The reason I've lost a little respect for Dina is because my boyfriend's ex wife did this when they got divorced and he moved out. And I think his ex wife is a total nut job!! She's all about being vegan and spiritual, but drives an SUV and refuses to work and expects men to take care of her. She's a walking contradiction. So this "smudging" thing is a little ridiculous to me.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters show up. I'm surprised Christine's dad isn't there. Danielle interviews that she has no concerns about Christine's eating habits now that she's a model. Cut to Christine getting "food" because she's "SO hungry" and comes back with two small slices of melon. Really? Not even a little concerned, Danielle?
TERESA
Caroline and Jacqueline come backstage to say hi to Gia and Teresa. Teresa is in a sexy dress and three inch heels and NINE MONTHS PREGNANT. Wow. Teresa sees that Christine is on the cover of the Daily and she shows Gia and says how pretty Christine is. Danielle interviews that she doesn't think Teresa is genuinely happy for Christine. Why not?? Teresa hates you, Danielle. She has nothing against your daughter. And, from what I've seen, Christine and Jillian are already twice the woman Danielle will ever be.
Out comes Gia and she looks so cute. Jacqueline, Teresa and Caroline are squealing and clapping in the front row. It's super exciting. Gia does a great job. Even Joe tells her how beautiful she is. Ahhh. Gag.
Up next...the REBECCA MINKOFF SHOW
Christine is 5'10" and walking in "6-inch heels." I think they're actually 4-inch heels, which are not that bad. I have plenty of shoes that high and they aren't hard to walk in. As Christine comes down the runway, Danielle interviews that Christine will be a supermodel and travel all over the world "with me by her side." It's always about Danielle. Can't you just be happy for Christine and let her enjoy it...WITHOUT YOU RIDING HER COATTAILS??
Danielle is talking to EVERYONE and bragging about Christine. Meanwhile, Christine and the other models are all posing on the runway for photographers for about 25 minutes after the show and Christine tells the model next to her that she doesn't feel good. Well, I'm not surprised. She only ate two little slices of melon! Christine tells people she doesn't feel good and that she's going to "barf." She starts gagging. Someone pulls her off the stage. She sits in the back and gets some water. She's totally sweating and Danielle gets back there and figures out that Christine didn't eat anything. Her agent tells her that this happens sometimes and Christine is relieved that she isn't the only one who almost fainted.
All in all, the two girls did a great job.
See you next week!
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline and her son, CJ, decide to paint one of his white shirts. Normal people (even those with money) would get a white Hanes T-Shirt for their kid to paint. Not Jacqueline. She and her son are painting one of his white Polo shirts.
DANIELLE
Danielle is a bad mom. There, I said it. She and Jillian (her 11 year old) come home and find a bouquet of flowers with a card that says "Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl. Congratulations!" Rather than comment what a sweet gesture and what pretty flowers, Danielle asks HER DAUGHTER why she thinks Jacqueline sent them. Jillian says that Jacqueline probably sent them because she's proud of Christine. DUH! Danielle wants her daughter to talk shit with her so she asks if Jillian thinks that she sent them because she felt bad about missing the luncheon. Shut up, Danielle. Seriously. Why are you doing this to your CHILD? Leave her alone.
Danielle keeps going and asks Jillian if she should call Jacqueline. Jillian says she doesn't know and, by her look, she doesn't care, either. SHE'S 11! Then, Danielle decides to call and asks Jillian to hang out while she calls. Jillian says that she thinks her mom needs privacy and Danielle says no. WHY ARE YOU BRINGING YOUR KIDS INTO YOUR DRAMA?!?! Jacqueline ignores the call and Danielle leaves a message. THEN, she asks Jillian if she thinks Jacqueline is busy with the baby or just didn't want to pick up. Why would you ask your kid that? Jillian is smart and not insane like her mother so she says that Jacqueline is a normal person, so she's probably busy. Heh. "People are busy."
Danielle is diabolical. She bitches that Jacqueline didn't come to her luncheon and tells Jacqueline that she can tell Christine herself if she's proud of her. SO, Jacqueline sends Christine flowers to tell her how proud she is of her. AND NOW, Danielle bitches because she doesn't know why Jacqueline is sending flowers when she doesn't have a relationship with any of them. WTF? She is insane. I really think she needs a shrink. I'm pretty convinced that she's Borderline and/or Histrionic and for sure Narcissistic.
Then Danielle decides to call Jacqueline AGAIN. This time she says "I think maybe it would be a good idea if you step out of the room" to her daughter. Before she can get to "good idea," Jillian says "ok" and bolts out of there. HAHA. WHY is Danielle calling her AGAIN?? She just left a message. Jeez. Jacqueline ignores the call again and this is Danielle's message:
"Hi Jacqueline. It's Danielle. Um, I have to be quite honest with you. I really was under the impression that you were you're own woman. And I think it's really gonna affect us, going forward until, at least, you're able to perhaps maybe even celebrate my children with me. [WHAT?] And I need to know how we're going to move forward from this if this is always going to stand in the way. It's up to you. I've made the moves. I've reached out and, um, I'm going to leave the rest up to you now. Bye."
I don't even understand what she was saying.
DINA
Dina tells Teresa that Danielle invited her to the "luncheon" for Christine. Dina interviews that she told Danielle when she forgave her that she needed time before they could be friends so she just wants Danielle to back OFF! Teresa doesn't get why Danielle is still in the picture. I agree. Everyone hates her, yet, they all talk about her incessantly. MOVE ON people. Even Dina, who apparently "runs from drama" is confused about what to do about Danielle. It's easy, really. Stop answering her calls and texting with her. It's done...let it die, already.
PS - Dina's cats are creepy.
JACQUELINE
Caroline and Jacqueline are chatting outside and the conversation begins with...who else? Danielle. Ridiculous. Caroline listens to Jacqueline vent and then just asks Jacqueline if Danielle ever acknowledged Nicholas's birth. Card, text, flowers, congratulations, etc? Nope. Nada. Nothing. I'm with Caroline....why are you even thinking about Danielle? Caroline: "I'm not saying my way is the right way, but I don't get the phone calls." LOVE IT!
DANIELLE
Danielle continues on her crusade to take away Christine's moment. First, she tells Jillian to look at pictures of Christine because they are so beautiful. In the next breath, she tells Jillian that she's next because she looks JUST LIKE CHRISTINE. Christine doesn't like the comparison and is probably wondering when she can just be happy for herself instead of sharing her moment with her mom and her sister.
TERESA
I'm embarrassed for Teresa in this scene. Her kids are the most obnoxious, spoiled brats. She spends $2,000 on tacky clothes for Gia while her other kids whine and completely mess up the boutique. I don't want to know any of those kids as teenagers or adults. Teresa tells Gia that she needs to get a job to support her spending. Gia's response: "I'm too pretty to work." Sad.
DINA
Dina confuses me. I think she's pretty and always well put together when she goes out. She seems like the most "normal" of all the Jersey ladies. But her house is completely crowded with tacky, gawdy furniture and decorations. And she's got those weird cats and she has a bird AND NOW she's meeting with an "energist"? WTF? Again, the conversation is centered around Danielle. OY! Dina wants to eliminate all the drama and basically, eliminate Danielle from her life, but she feels mean doing that. The "energist" tells Dina that she needs to tell Danielle to her face that she's done.
DANIELLE
Danielle's dog is disgusting. It's wiping it's ass on the carpet. GROSS. Her realtor, Karin, shows up and Danielle wants to know if she asked Danielle's ex to pay to fix up the house. Karin talks and talks, but bottom line: He's not paying for anything. Danielle whines that her ex hasn't paid for any upkeep on the house, but is insisting she sell the house so he can have his half. Well, that's the way it works. You're divorced. Why should he pay for the upkeep on the house he's not living in?? (Although, it might help get a better sale in the end, but whatever.) Teresa interviews that Danielle should get a job. I agree. I think all those women should get a job! Too much entitlement.
Danielle interviews that her home is worth $2M, but she'll probably only get $1.5M for it. That means her ex will get about $750K from the sale and she'll get "well under $1M. Nice way to treat a person." Are you F-ing kidding me??? I WISH someone would give me $750K so I can buy a house. She's delusional. This is what I'm talking about. ENTITLED. GET A JOB. Danielle decides to take her house off the market until her ex is willing to "fulfill his obligations" and fix up the house. [insert eye roll here]
CAROLINE
Caroline and Albie go to Teresa's house for dinner and to celebrate Gia's upcoming cat walk debut. Teresa says that she and Joe are "old school" but in a cute way. Meaning, he treats her like a 1950's housewife and he acts like the sexist, macho Italian. Yeah, so cute. Wow. Those girls are OUT OF CONTROL. I can't believe they were eating dinner at 8pm.
FASHION WEEK!!
So, Joe is the type of father who likes to tease his kids. But sometimes the teasing is just mean. My dad can be the same way. If you are a really sensitive person, it's hard to be around guys like that. But, if you have a good sense of self and sense of humor, it doesn't bug you. Joe tells Gia that she's going to walk down the "ugly runway" because she's so ugly. Ok, that's just mean. It's a little beyond just teasing. Teresa's response: "Gia is very sensitive." Yeah, that's the problem. Jeez. Teresa and Joe can't figure out why Gia is crying. Gia says "Dad is mean." Teresa: "Ok, Gia stop." Really? Your husband just called your daughter ugly, her feelings are hurt and all you have say is "Gia stop"? Who is this woman? Gia and Teresa get out of the car and Teresa tells her that her dad was just kidding. Terrible.
DANIELLE
Danielle, Christine and Jillian arrive at IMG to meet with Christine's agent and a walking coach, Mac Folkes. Well, what do you know, Christine is a normal 15 year old. She doesn't really care about doing the perfect "walk," but she tries. Danielle is shouting out critiques which is dumb because Danielle is NO MODEL. She looks like she's next in line to be the cat lady. Christine finally gets annoyed and decides she's done practicing.
DINA
OMG. I just lost a little respect for Dina. Her energist decides to do some "smudging" with her before she leaves. "Smudging" is when you burn dry sage to get rid of the negative energy. The reason I've lost a little respect for Dina is because my boyfriend's ex wife did this when they got divorced and he moved out. And I think his ex wife is a total nut job!! She's all about being vegan and spiritual, but drives an SUV and refuses to work and expects men to take care of her. She's a walking contradiction. So this "smudging" thing is a little ridiculous to me.
DANIELLE
Danielle and her daughters show up. I'm surprised Christine's dad isn't there. Danielle interviews that she has no concerns about Christine's eating habits now that she's a model. Cut to Christine getting "food" because she's "SO hungry" and comes back with two small slices of melon. Really? Not even a little concerned, Danielle?
TERESA
Caroline and Jacqueline come backstage to say hi to Gia and Teresa. Teresa is in a sexy dress and three inch heels and NINE MONTHS PREGNANT. Wow. Teresa sees that Christine is on the cover of the Daily and she shows Gia and says how pretty Christine is. Danielle interviews that she doesn't think Teresa is genuinely happy for Christine. Why not?? Teresa hates you, Danielle. She has nothing against your daughter. And, from what I've seen, Christine and Jillian are already twice the woman Danielle will ever be.
Out comes Gia and she looks so cute. Jacqueline, Teresa and Caroline are squealing and clapping in the front row. It's super exciting. Gia does a great job. Even Joe tells her how beautiful she is. Ahhh. Gag.
Up next...the REBECCA MINKOFF SHOW
Christine is 5'10" and walking in "6-inch heels." I think they're actually 4-inch heels, which are not that bad. I have plenty of shoes that high and they aren't hard to walk in. As Christine comes down the runway, Danielle interviews that Christine will be a supermodel and travel all over the world "with me by her side." It's always about Danielle. Can't you just be happy for Christine and let her enjoy it...WITHOUT YOU RIDING HER COATTAILS??
Danielle is talking to EVERYONE and bragging about Christine. Meanwhile, Christine and the other models are all posing on the runway for photographers for about 25 minutes after the show and Christine tells the model next to her that she doesn't feel good. Well, I'm not surprised. She only ate two little slices of melon! Christine tells people she doesn't feel good and that she's going to "barf." She starts gagging. Someone pulls her off the stage. She sits in the back and gets some water. She's totally sweating and Danielle gets back there and figures out that Christine didn't eat anything. Her agent tells her that this happens sometimes and Christine is relieved that she isn't the only one who almost fainted.
All in all, the two girls did a great job.
See you next week!
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