Kell on Earth, Season 1, Episode 1

I have been waiting for this show to begin. I LOVE IT!! Kelly Cutrone is my hero.

KELLY

Kelly Cutrone is the owner and a partner of PEOPLE'S REVOLUTION. People's Revolution is a Public Relations and Branding firm. It's Kelly's - and her partners and employees - job to produce fashion shows all over the world and get press for their clients. It's their job to get the clothes off the runways and into magazines and onto the backs of celebrities so that everyone will want to buy them!

ROBYN

Robyn is one of Kelly's partners. She's really pretty and seems sweet, but she's totally got an edge to her. She likes things done right and she gets pissed when they aren't.

EMILY

Emily is also one of Kelly's partners. She's also pretty and has an edge. The three of them are super powerful and great at their jobs. They demand excellence and they won't settle for less.

Kelly informs us that they are in the fashion BUSINESS and most of her employees will realize that they don't get it and aren't good enough. It's a tough business. You need tough skin and killer organizational skills.

On top of being totally badass, Kelly is also a single mom to 7 year old, Ava.


Kelly is having a company meeting and tells everyone that it's officially FASHION WEEK and she's "fucking out for motherfucking keeps." She's serious, y'all. They have TEN fashion week events so they are super busy. The partners tell the employees/interns/assistants that they need to step it up, not screw up and be there everyday until Fashion Week is over. Kelly tells them her office "rule": "I have a rule that there's no crying in the office. If you have to cry, go outside. And, if you're sensitive and somebody hurts your feelings, I don't give a fuck. This is not group therapy, so get over it. We're not really mean, but we'll say mean things to you for sure. So just know, if you're crying or having a bad day and you've been knocked around, the best thing to do is to come back. Some days just fucking suck." I love her.

Everyone is freaking out and running around like meth addicts. It's totally frantic because everything needs to be organized and calls are being made to finalize guest lists and seating charts. David Delfin - the "most famous designer in Spain" - is coming into the office so the showroom upstairs needs to look perfect. Robyn has Stephanie V. - Account Exec - clean it up. She does "her best" and shows Robyn and she totally changes things around. David Delfin stops by to talk about what's going on for the show. They go over stuff and he stays for awhile and then leaves. Stephanie V. bitches that she cleaned the showroom and got shit from Robyn for not doing it right all for nothing because they didn't even see it. She bugs.

Stephanie S. is Kelly's previous assistant who was promoted to Junior Account Executive. She looks rough. She has a love/hate relationship with Kelly. On one hand she totally respects her and sees her as a role model, but on the other hand, she is a hard ass bitch.

Andrew is Kelly's new assistant. He's got long black hair and looks sort of like a cross between a goth and a rocker. He's gay, which I never would have guessed and he's super cool. Kelly hired him because she was sick of blond sorority girls who "like fashion". She tells Andrew that she's actively looking for a sexual partner for him. No sexual harassment at PR, eh?

Kelly grabs the NY POST and sees that Ashley Dupre - "escort" who slept with Elliot Spitzer - is on the cover. Apparently, last year during FASHION WEEK, Ashley showed up at one of Kelly's client's shows and sat in the front row. Kelly didn't kick her out and didn't think it was a big deal: "I didn't think it was a big since half the people sitting in the front are f****** people for money. They're just their wives." HAHA. UNTIL...her client came to her the next day and fired her for letting a "hooker sit in the front row" of the show. Yikes.

Kelly is AWESOME. She invites Ashley to come to PR. She and Ashley have become friends. Kelly's perspective is that everyone is a hooker to a certain extent. She may not necessarily WANT to talk to her clients but she does because they are paying her to. Heh. Ashley tells Kelly that she and her friends were going to crash Fashion Week again and Kelly tells her not to and that she should lay low.



Everyone is working on the David Delfin show in two hours!! Kelly shows up and checks out how everything is going. Andrew - her assistant - is wearing a floor length sequin dress and a flannel shirt. WTF? Apparently, it's fashion. I think it's ugly, but what do I know?

It's 30 minutes to the show and Kelly tells everyone that it's time for FIRST LOOKS. That means the models change out of their own clothes and into their first look for the show. There's a rule that photographers CANNOT shoot backstage during FIRST LOOKS because most of the models are under 18 and naked. Kelly spots a photographer shooting First Looks and kicks him out. She doesn't have time for that shit.


Back at PR, people are working frantically on the other shows. Next up is the Chado Ralph Rucci show. Stephanie S. tells us she's from Chicago and she's been in NYC for 3 years. She loves the fashion industry and the lifestyle but she's super nervous because it's her first fashion week where she's not an intern or Kelly's assistant. Robyn's assistant, Andrew S., is super gay and adorable. He tells us that he left his secure job as a colorist in LA to move to NYC and join the fashion business. He left his successful job in California to come to NYC and "be called a retard. Supposedly living my dream." Hmmm. He hands Stephanie S. a list and tells her that those are all the RSVPs and Stephanie S. asks him if he's sure. Andrew gets all offended and tells her to chillax and pop an Adivan. She refuses and tells him to stop pushing her to take a pill. She really could use one, though.


There's some "monitor" drama backstage at the David Delfin show and Kelly takes care of it. She goes to the Director's Booth to run the show. Andrew - Kelly's assistant - is crushing on one of the 22 year old models. The show goes off without a hitch and backstage Kelly is coordinating the press. Back at PR, Kelly tries to hook her asst. up with the hot Spanish model. Oops, he has a boyfriend. Too bad, so sad.


Robyn gives us the layout of the PR office building. People's Revolution's showroom is on the 2nd Floor, the office is on the 3rd Floor, Kelly's apartment is the 4th Floor, and another showroom is on the 5th Floor. Robyn is living on the 5th Floor because her lease ended and she had to move out of her apartment. I would HATE to live where I work...oh wait, I do. Ugh.

Kelly is at home cooking dinner for Ava with Ava's nanny. Kelly tells us that she had Ava alone because she and her boyfriend broke up when she was pregnant. I guess he's totally out of the picture now. She has set up PR to be a live/work building so she can always be with Ava. I think that's cool. I actually wouldn't mind that set up. Robyn actually lives in the office/showroom. But Kelly has an entire floor that is her home so she's actually getting away. Then, she just goes down a couple of floors to work. It's kind of a sweet set up if you have a family.

Everyone is freaking out over the seating chart for the Chado show. Kelly tells us that Chado Ralph Rucci is the only American Couturier which means he is a member of the Federation of Couture. So when people talk about wearing a couture gown, it's not really couture unless the designer is a Couturier. The seating chart is SUPER important. Where you sit determines how much power you have. So, rows 1-3 means you're in. Anything above that - you're out. And, magazine people can't sit next to each other and you can't put InTouch, US Weekly, etc. next to celebrities. It's all very political. So crazy. The coordination is out of control and super complicated.

There's some drama because Stephanie S. asked Stephanie V. to help her and she didn't do it. DRAMA and STRESS. Stephanie S. is freaking out. Steph V. admits she fucked up but tells us that she's human and she makes mistakes. Oooh, better not admit that to Kelly. She no like dat. Kelly tells Steph S. that the lesson is that you can't just delegate and leave it alone, you need to follow up to make sure it's getting done. True dat. So Kelly solves the problem and puts Andrew - her asst. - in charge. He's not thrilled with that, but that's the way it goes.

Kelly is VBI (very busy & important) so she doesn't have time to go out and do normal things like eyebrow waxes and mani/pedis. So they come to her office and do it for her there. HA! Awesome. I want that.

It's the day before the Chado Ralph Rucci show and they are trying to figure out the RSVP list and seating chart. Andrew - Kelly's Asst. - screws up. He added names to the RSVP list without checking to see if they were invited. Robyn is pissed because she's only taking RSVPs from people who were invited. Not invited? NOT COMING. Steph S. helps Andrew fix the problem because she really likes him and doesn't want him to get fired. He doesn't really know what he's doing so she's taken him under her wing to help him.

It's 20 hours to the show and they are all scrambling. Andrew - Kelly's asst. - is a good friend. He tells Steph S. to try not to stress so much. He tells her to cry and she tells him she feels stupid. He tells her to put it into context. Chado is freaking everyone out and the partners are freaking out on Steph S. Shit rolls downhill, Steph. They are trying to finalize and correct the RSVP list so they can send it to Chado's people.

18 hours to the show and the team is still working on the RSVP list/Seating chart. Andrew sums it up - every person in every seat at the show has an enormous ego. That's why Robyn and Kelly are the ones in charge - they know everyone and everything and they are stellar at coordinating it all.

5 hours to the show and Chado is freaking out about the list/seating chart. He wants to see it so that he will know who will be at the show. Ava comes down to see her mom and tells her that she wants to sit in the front row. Kelly tells her to relax because she's 7!! HA. Kelly tells Steph S. to print out the seating chart and ... there's a problem with the printer/computer. It's not printing and then it does, and it's missing data. DRAMA. Kelly wants to know if the list has been sent and Steph S. tells her that there's a problem. The system crashed and Kelly is PISSED. She's yelling for Steph S. to print it and send it right now. Steph S. is crying and doesn't know what to do. She won't send it out wrong.

So Steph S. tells Kelly that she's going to type it all in. Kelly says NO and Steph S. tells her she's not sending it out as is. But it's beyond their control. The system is down. Kelly gets it but she's pissed.

THE END. Love it.