Last time Gretchen and Lynne had it out about the Alexa thing, Vicki had a sleepover and no one slept over, and Ryan and Simon made up.
TAMRA
Tamra meets Alexis to play some tennis. Alexis tells us that Tamra was ridiculous in her wedges and little tennis skirt. HA. They decide to play and have fun. Are they playing with PINK tennis balls? Yes, yes they are. They finish playing and sit on a bench. Alexis asks Tamra if she's going to Gretchen's tupperware party. Tamra says that she doesn't think she's going to go. Alexis asks why and Tamra asks her if she really wants to know. Alexis says yes, so Tamra tells her that Gretchen has a really nasty, vulgar blog on her website about Tamra and Simon. Alexis is incredulous. [Btw - I just read the blog and it's not vulgar. It basically is Gretchen's side of the story regarding all the allegations from the last reunion show. It's stupid and ridiculous and not nice, but not vulgar.] Tamra says that she asked Gretchen to remove the blog, but she refused. Alexis says that she's in shock. Alexis says she understands because the two of them are supposed to be burying the hatchet but Gretchen refuses to remove the blog.
GRETCHEN
Slade is making some appetizers for Gretchen's tupperware party. She decided it would be very kitchy to have a tupperware party. Lynne arrives and tells us that she and Gretchen hit a rough patch with the Alexa thing, but they have moved past it. Vicki isn't coming because she has to work. Gretchen says that Tamra told her she'd go to the party, but then she heard through Alexis and Lynne that she wasn't coming. Tamra tells us "HELL NO would I go to Gretchen's tupperware party." Alexis shows up...with her HUSBAND. WHY THE HELL WOULD JIM WANT TO GO TO A FRICKIN' TUPPERWARE PARTY. JEEZ.
Gretchen tells us there's a surprise and all of a sudden, KAY SEDIA, the Tupperware Sales Person comes downstairs. It's a guy! (Wait, Frank is there, too? It must have been a coed party. Still, what guy wants to go to a Tupperware party? Dumb.) Kay is a drag queen. Oh I get it - Kay Sedia - Quesadilla! LOVE IT. Kay is a RIOT!
Gretchen is refilling drinks and she hears Alexis shouting at Mel (Gretchen's friend): "Yeah, that's my husband. Be respectful. All I know is everytime I'm around you and him, you are all about him. He's my husband. He's married. He's taken." Mel: "Ok, because I have a one year old and a fiance." Jim is telling Alexis to calm down. It's so funny to me. NO ONE WANTS YOUR TROLL-LOOKING HUSBAND, ALEXIS. Mel tells her that she's having a good night with her friends and doesn't know what Alexis's problem is. Alexis tells Mel that she saw her all over her husband. "He's my husband and you need to back off." Mel: "You need to be more confident about your husband." Mel tells her that she had one glass of wine at the table and Alexis comes and starts yelling at her. Jim is just enjoying this little ridiculous display on his behalf. SO DUMB. Alexis looks like a total idiot. I'll say it again: NO ONE WANTS YOUR TROLL-LOOKING HUSBAND, ALEXIS.
Alexis and Mel go off to the side and Mel tells Alexis that she just had a conversation with Jim and Alexis was like "Hell no, bitch." Alexis tells her that she did not do that because she doesn't talk that way. Mel: "Dude, are you kidding me? That's your man. I know that." Jim tells us that he's pretty naive when a girl is hitting on him so he doesn't really get it. Um...NO GIRL is EVER hitting on you, Jim. It's not that you're naive. It's that it has never happened. Dumb.
Mel tells Alexis that she got a glass of wine and Jim came up to her and introduced himself and said that he was Alexis's husband. Then at the hors d'ouvre table, Alexis came up and started yelling at her. Mel says that it hurt her feelings. While Mel is explaining what happened, Alexis is interrupting and telling her to stop talking and to let her talk. STFU Alexis. Listen to the girl, first. Stupid. Alexis tells Mel that she would never "lean" on someone else's husband and Mel was "leaning" on Jim. Jim finally tells Slade that it isn't ending so they are going to leave. Slade breaks it up and walks Mel away and Alexis and Jim leave. Jeez. Alexis, you are CRAZY.
Back in the party, Gretchen asks another friend if it's disrespectful to talk to someone else's husband. Alexis and Gretchen's friend, Sarah, explains that the WAY that Mel was talking to Jim was offensive to Alexis. Sarah, you are as dumb as your friend, Alexis. Seriously, people. Have you SEEN Jim? Why the hysteria? Alexis, you should be flattered that other women want to even talk to him and aren't sitting and laughing at you for being married to a troll.
Jim is lecturing Alexis outside. Jim: "Ok, here's the deal. This is a tequila party. And what does tequila do to people? It makes them irrational. So leave it alone and let it be." Alexis tries to defend her actions and Jim says: "End of conversation. Conversation is over." Period. Done and done.
OMG OMG OMG!! I LOVE GRETCHEN'S FRIEND - who Bravo does not identify by name. She yells out "Can I just say something? He is NOT ATTRACTIVE! He is NOT ATTRACTIVE!! No one is hitting on her husband." HAHAHA!! CHEERS!!
LYNNE
Tamra and her family all come over to Lynne's and Lynne tells us that Tamra has become one of her best friends. Lynne tells Tamra that she had a rough day yesterday with Alexa. Frank and Lynne tell Simon and Tamra that Alexa has been difficult because she's not following the rules and often talks over them when they are trying to talk to her. Tamra brings up the "lunch" with Gretchen and Alexa. So Lynne tells Tamra that Gretchen called and asked to take Alexa shopping and talk to her. Tamra asks if Lynne felt like Gretchen was stepping on her toes. Lynne says that she doesn't want her daughter taking advice from Gretchen. Tamra agrees and says that she doesn't want her daughter listening to someone who...then she turns around and sees her daughters listening intensely to the conversation and Tamra just says "Well, I don't want my daughters taking advice from Gretchen."
Raquel and Alexa are laying out at the beach. Alexa says that she wants to go in the water and Raquel says that she doesn't. Alexa tells her she's being lame. Raquel just says that she doesn't want to go in the water and Alexa says that she never wants to do anything with her. Alexa tells us that she and Raquel used to be super close and now Raquel doesn't want to do anything with her. Alexa tries to confront Raquel about how things have been and how Alexa feels like Raquel just blows her off. It goes badly. Raquel gets defensive and denies everything and the subject gets dropped.
Lynne calls Alexa on her cell phone and tells her "Yeah, you have to stay in tonight." Alexa responds incredulously: "WHAT?" Lynne: "You're not allowed to leave the house tonight." Alexa doesn't understand what she did and Lynne explains that she came home way after her curfew the night before so she can't go out tonight. Alexa says ok and hangs up. Alexa tells us that she went out anyway because she knows she's not going to get in trouble. She says they've never grounded her so she's going out. Um, I think when your mom said you can't go out because you were late the night before, she was grounding you. BUT, I see Alexa's point. You can't START disciplining your kids and teaching them to respect you when they turn 17. It's gotta start earlier than that.
An hour after Alexa took off with her friends, Lynne and Frank come to find her gone. Lynne tells Frank that Alexa was not supposed to leave the house but she did.
Lynne calls Alexa and asks where she is. Alexa said she went to "Javier's" to get food and Lynne says that she brought food home for her. Alexa says "I already left. Bye." and hangs up. Lynne says that she thinks she and Frank should make a trip to Javier's and Frank says that there's only so much chasing around you can do. Ahhh. I see. The problem is Frank. He wants to be Alexa's friend and wants to give her freedom and Lynne knows that what she needs is discipline, but she has no one to back her up and help her follow through.
VICKI
Vicki heads out to the office and she looks great! She's not working from home anymore. She says that she's the only housewife who's out there working hard and her house isn't in foreclosure and she's happy with Donn and things are going well. She has a point. She goes in the office and calls a staff meeting. She asks how hard they've been working and they all say "Really hard". So Vicki surprises them with a Botox and Tanning party at WORK. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WTF? I love you, Vicki, but not everyone is as superficial and plastic as you are. Well, maybe in the OC, they are.
LYNNE
Someone leaves a message for Lynne - it sounds like Raquel. The voicemail says "Alexa's curfew is 11 p.m. so she'll be home at 11." It's 11:15 pm and still no Alexa. Frank tells Lynne that she doesn't think she's doing anything bad. Frank says that he thinks they need to ease up on Alexa and Lynne says that they've been easing up too much on her. Finally, at 11:42pm, Alexa comes home. They call her upstairs and ask her where she was. She tells them that she was at her friend, Matt's birthday party. Lynne is PISSED. Alexa is in a tank top, sweat pants and Uggs. Some party. Frank tells Alexa that it's not ok for her to just walk out of the house and not tell them where she's going. Alexa interviews that she stays out late because she likes to party.
Alexa says that it's been hard lately because she's dealing with some personal stuff that she doesn't want "people" to know. I'm guessing "people" means the public. She tells Lynne that they've both been busy so she's not blaming Lynne, but when Lynne has free time, Alexa feels like her mind is somewhere else. Alexa says that she tries to communicate with them, but sometimes they put all the blame on her and don't take any responsibility. Alexa interviews that she knows her parents too well and knows they don't understand discipline. So she just talks about how hard it is to talk to them and they will forget that she was super late. Nice. She's right. They tell her that they worry about her and just want her to be safe. Alexa interviews that sometimes she wants to try to find that limit where they will say "NO! You can't do that." But so far, she hasn't hit that limit, so she'll just keep partying!!
VICKI
Michael is in Vegas with some friends. He goes to a poker room to start playing. He doesn't think other players take him seriously. He's annoying.
ALEXIS
Slade, Gretchen, Jim and Alexis are in a limo on their way to spend a day at the races. Gretchen just wanted to make sure there weren't hard feelings about the Tupperware party. They arrive at the Del Mar races. Gretchen and Alexis have huge hats on ("Take those ridiculous things off!" - Name the movie!) They go into a room and sit in a booth. Gretchen tells Alexis she is having so much more fun than last year. Gretchen brings up the blog and why she needs to have it up. Alexis just listens. She tells us that she understands both Gretchen and Tamra's perspectives and she's not taking a side. Alexis tells Gretchen that both of the stories sound right. And she says one person isn't more right. Jim chimes in and reminds Alexis of "our rule" - "We go by our experiences with a person." Alexis agrees and Jim says that they don't know the facts so they can't say who is right and who is wrong. Alexis says that she has the right say her point of view and from her point of view she thinks they both have right points and they both have wrong points.
LYNNE
Vanessa Van Petten - the Youthologist - from the first episode this season is back to help Frank and Lynne with Alexa. Lynne sees that Vanessa has helped motivate Raquel with her artwork and it's been working. Alexa is not at home but she knew she was supposed to be there for the meeting with Vanessa. Lynne calls her and Alexa says she's at her friend, Crystal's house. Lynne tells her to come home and Alexa says she'll be home later so Lynne passes the phone to Vanessa. Vanessa asks Alexa to come home now and Alexa says "okay." Vanessa asks if Alexa has been coming to them more since the last meeting. Frank says that she did for a few days, but now she's leaving without telling anyone where she's going. Frank says he thinks it's that teenage rebellion thing. These parents are way too laid back. DISCIPLINE, people!! Alexa will end up in rehab if you don't start ASAP.
Alexa shows up. Lynne tries to ask where she's been and wants to know what's going on. Alexa rolls her eyes and says nothing and then sits with Raquel. Frank interviews that Alexa came home and had no accountability for not being there on time and it's very frustrating to him. It's totally disrespectful, but no one in that house has ever taught her to treat her parents with respect. Alexa starts crying that Lynne just attacked her as soon as she walked in the door. So Vanessa takes her downstairs to get ready for a minute. Now Lynne feels like the bad guy. THAT'S OK. You're the parent, not the friend!!!
Alexa and Vanessa talk downstairs. Vanessa tells Alexa that her parents are frustrated because they don't know where she is or who she is with. They want to be close to her but they are worried about Alexa being safe. Alexa says she doesn't buy that. Vanessa says that they are finally trying to set some boundaries. And Alexa says that's not fair because Raquel never had boundaries. Yes, but Raquel ended up in REHAB! She tells Vanessa that her whole life she's had this free ride and now, all of a sudden, they are trying to put their foot down. They should have done it a long time ago, not now. Vanessa asks if she would be willing to tell that to her parents. She agrees.
They go back up to Lynne and Frank. Vanessa tells everyone that she knows today was a little bit rough and encourages them to talk to each other. Lynne says that Alexa is not doing what they need her to do. They need to know where she is and they need her home at a certain time. Lynne explains that her mind wanders and she worries when Alexa isn't home and she doesn't know where she is. Alexa says that they never set these boundaries with Raquel when she was 17 and now she feels like she's being punished for doing something wrong. Frank trusts Alexa isn't doing anything bad, they just worry about her and want her to be safe. As Frank is saying all of this to Alexa, she's texting on her phone. I would have grabbed that phone right out of her hand. SO DISRESPECTFUL. Alexa says that this is just coming out of left field and that it has to be a negotiation. Lynne reminds her that they are the parents and they tell her what to do. Alexa laughs and says that she doesn't want to talk about this anymore and starts crying that they are making her seem like the bad kid.
Raquel interviews that she's kind of embarrassed that Alexa is having a fit and crying. She says that Alexa is a drama queen. Alexa gets up and says she's done talking to them about this. DRAMA.
Alexa says she's leaving. Lynne asks who is picking her up and she says "her friends". Lynne asks which friends and Alexa just walks out. See, I would not be calmly sitting on the couch if that happened. I would be taking away privileges. The phone would be the first to go. Not ok. How can they just quietly sit there?
Until next time...
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