"It's Not Me, It's You."
TERESA
Gia and Teresa are off to an audition for a part in a movie with Christian Slater. Seriously? According to Teresa, Gia's modeling career is taking off, but not her acting career. Um, maybe that's because she's not an actress. OY VEY! They arrive at the audition and I think they're late. Gia walks in and there are 5 kids in there already working with the casting director. Oops. Teresa stays in the waiting area with her baby and the other stage moms/dads. She starts talking to them about Gia and goes on and on and on about how awesome she is. She brags about fashion week and all this other stuff that she's done. The other parents could not give a shit. Teresa ends with "I'm so not a 'stage mom.'" HAHA.
CAROLINE
We're at the Brownstone with Albert Sr., Chris and Lauren. They are working hard and Caroline tells us that the business has taken 30 years to become a success. That's why Danielle's stunt last week was a total nightmare for them. She kept saying that they didn't have a table for her and they kicked her out...both of which are false. She arrived with 6-8 guys who had not paid and did not RSVP. It was a charity fundraiser for a baby with cancer. The fact that Danielle showed up with 8 ex-cons ready to start trouble and then insist that the Brownstone accommodate them is just horrible. I hope the father learned his lesson and realized it wasn't worth it to invite her. She's a skank.
JACQUELINE
Jacqueline brings her baby with her while she gets a pedicure. Kim "G", Danielle's friend, comes in for a mani/pedi and sits next to Jacqueline. Kim "G" seems like she's in her late 50's, but she dresses like she's in her late 20's/early 30's. It's so bizarre. The baby is crying so Jacqueline carries him while she gets her pedicure. She's trying to avoid a "Danielle" conversation. Kim "G" tells Jacqueline that they arrived at the Brownstone and Danielle had an entourage of thugs waiting for them. Kim says that she was embarrassed and uncomfortable to be there. It's so random. Kim seems like a very conservative, proper, ladylike woman. I find it so fascinating that she calls Danielle her "friend." She seemed so out of place with those ex-cons. She's basically telling Jacqueline that she doesn't like the company that Danielle keeps. Kim tells Jacqueline that she wants to talk to Danielle about it.
Jacqueline laughs. She tells Kim that you can't say anything negative to Danielle or she will blow up at you. Very true.
DANIELLE
Kim throws Danielle a birthday party and they are getting their hair and make-up done beforehand to get ready. While they are getting ready, Kim confirms with Danielle that Danny is not coming. Danielle says she can call him and Kim says NO! She tells Danielle that she is really upset about the name-calling that happened at the Brownstone. She is referring to Danny calling Christopher a "faggot." Danielle immediately gets defensive and says that Danny didn't call a gay man a "faggot." OH, I get it. So it's ok to call straight people a gay slur, but not a gay man. I wonder if the same logic applies to racial slurs. Hmmm.
Danielle is such a hypocrite about this. In Season 1, when the housewives and their families were taking dance lessons, Joe remarked that some move looked "gay." Danielle freaked out because she has gay friends and found it totally offensive. But when her "friend" calls a 20 year old a "faggot," apparently it's ok. She's so stupid. It's never OK, Danielle. Straight, gay, bi ... WHATEVER. It's never ok to use a gay or racial slur!!!!
Danielle gets totally defensive. Kim says that Danielle could have picked a better escort. Danielle says that she talked to Danny because she's a "gay advocate" y'all. She just gets super defensive and thinks this is coming out of nowhere. Danielle says "shame on" Chris's parents for putting him out front and not being there themselves so that Chris had to deal with that on his own. Um, why is anyone dealing with ANYTHING?? Kim ends the conversation saying that she didn't like being subjected to that scene and she hopes it doesn't happen again.
Ok, Kim's mother-in-law looks as old as Kim. Maybe Kim looks old, but is really young. Its' so strange. Danielle cries at her party. Danielle says that she learned a lot about Kim that night. UGH. Danielle is so annoying.
DINA
Dina is meeting with her assistant and talking about her Ladybug Foundation. She is shocked about Danielle's scene at the Brownstone at an event for a baby with cancer. Dina is done with Danielle.
TERESA
Teresa's agent tells Gia that they need to work on Gia's Jersey accent. Teresa seems kind of offended because she doesn't even know what a Jersey accent is. A dialect coach meets with Gia to help her lose the accent. Teresa says that Gia doesn't want to lose her Jersey accent and Teresa agrees. HAHA.
DANIELLE
Kim comes over to Danielle's house. Danielle tells her that Ashley has been creating hate pages about her on Facebook. Danielle blows it out of proportion and says that it's like terrorism and the KKK. Um, no it's not. Danielle shows Kim a comment on FB from Ashley after the event. The comment ends with "You and I both know where you're going ... TO HELL. Bye!" Danielle tells Kim that "Bye" is a threat and means that Ashley is going to kill her or have someone kill her. ARE YOU CRAZY??? Yes, you are. Danielle says that she wants nothing to do with the Manzo's but she is always stirring up trouble with them. No, Ashley should not have written that comment on FB, but she is 18 years old. YOU ARE ALMOST 50!!! GROW UP! She claims to not want drama but she's always the one creating it. Good LORD! Stop obsessing about this family and MOVE ON!
Danielle says she feels "threatened" by Ashley. Kim tells Danielle to call the police and have Ashley arrested. WTF?? Kim is just feeding Danielle's craziness.
JACQUELINE
Teresa and Jacqueline meet for lunch. Jacqueline tells her that she got a phone call saying that Danielle is telling people that Ashley sent a text message threatening to kill Danielle and she's going to have her arrested. Jacqueline is very upset so Teresa tells her to call Ashley. Ashley comes to the restaurant. Jacqueline confronts Ashley and Ashley says that she never threatened to kill Danielle. Ashley tells Jacqueline that Danielle told Ashley that she's fat. Ashley tells her mom exactly what she wrote. Ashley feels very protective of her family and they weren't speaking out against Danielle, so she did. Jacqueline asks Ashley to stop.
DANIELLE
Danielle takes Danny shopping for a nice suit. She feels like she needs to make him look more polished after Kim's comments. She thinks buying him a suit will change him and make him a better person. I thought she was broke. Danielle gets a call from Dina to meet for drinks and talk at 6pm. Danielle agrees and she and Danny are totally flabbergasted. Of course, Danny agrees to go and hide in the bushes in case anything happens. Danielle is so DRAMATIC. Danny also eggs her on and says that Danielle should expect an apology. Danielle calls Dina back to make sure it's just the two of them. OMG. So ridiculous. Dina is the one who needs protection. Danielle is CRAZY.
JACQUELINE
Ashley is at Derek's house and tells him about her conversation with her mom. Jacqueline calls in the middle of the conversation and yells at Ashley. Apparently Ashley posted on FB that Danielle is trying to get a warrant out for her arrest. Jacqueline is LIVID that Ashley would post anything after they just had that conversation! I agree. Ashley needs to stop. As ridiculous as it is that Danielle is battling with an 18 year old, Ashley really needs to stop. She gets off the phone and tells Derek why her mom is mad. Derek agrees with Jacqueline and tells Ashley to stop and that it's ridiculous to post stuff on FB.
CAROLINE
Caroline has a big dinner with everyone except Dina because she's meeting Danielle. Of course, Teresa calls and says that she's going to be late!! Teresa interviews that she can't be expected to be on time with 4 kids. HA!
They finally show up 1.5 hours late. They have lots of food and lots of family there. I love it. Ashley brings up the Danielle drama. No one wants to talk about her, but Ashley brings it up so they talk about her. Jacqueline tells the family what happened. Chris tells Ashley to ignore Danielle. Ashley says that Danielle started it by sending her a text that she needed to lose weight in her arms. So Ashley responded by saying that she needs to "fix her square tit and she looks like a grinch." HAHAHA!!! Everyone thought that was hilarious, as did I, but they agree that Ashley needs to just stop the nonsense already. Caroline says that Ashley should stop, but she understands WHY she's doing it.
Chris tells Joe about the gay slur and brings up the irony of the situation. Caroline says that what bothers her is that she's going beyond the adults and now she's attacking the kids. Caroline just wants Danielle to go away!!!!
DINA
Dina is getting ready to meet with Danielle. Danielle says that she expects an apology and then calls Danny to make sure that he's available and he tells her that he's in the parking lot.
Dina interviews that she gave Danielle the benefit of the doubt and Danielle made a fool out of her.
Dina starts by saying that they agreed that they would put the past behind them, but the things that Danielle has done recently demonstrates that she hasn't changed a bit. Dina says that the only thing in her life making her unhappy is having Danielle in it. So she's there to tell Danielle that she's done. Danielle gets defensive and brings up old shit. Dina stops her and says it's about her and setting her boundaries. Danielle is constantly interrupting and won't let Dina finish.
See you next week.
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