Last time - bitch fight at Lynne's dinner party. The claws were out!
We pick up where we left off with Tamra saying she doesn't want to be friends with "a hooker". Jeanna interviews that Tamra is the "mean girl". Vicki interviews that she's been doing this show for 5 years with these bitches and she can't understand why women can't get along. Lynne interviews that this was supposed to be her great dinner party and then starts crying. That's dumb because Lynne invited Gretchen and Tamra knowing that they would probably fight. Tamra interviews that Gretchen has her tongue down some guy's throat while she's wearing some other guy's engagement ring. It kind of makes Tamra wonder about Gretchen. Gretchen interviews that she's going to "kill this bitch". She says all Tamra does all day is go on the internet and read stuff and believe it's the truth. They keep bickering and when Gretchen tells Tamra to "shut the fuck up", Tamra says "I quit" and she and Vicki get up and leave. As Vicki is leaving she says "this is bullshit".
Jeanna, Gretchen and Lynne sit and continue to bitch about Tamra. Gretchen says that Tamra is disrespectful and cunning. Jeanna tells Gretchen that she needs to remember Tamra's background. Gretchen says "She's white trash!!" and then starts laughing. Um...what's the saying? Glass houses, stones?? You're not exactly a "Kennedy", Gretch. Gretchen tells Jeanna that Tamra DEFAMED her and her relationship with Jeff. Someone's been talking to a lawyer.
Meanwhile, Vicki and Tamra are bitching on their way out. Vicki says "if the guy didn't have any money, tell me she'd still be dating him." Good point. If Jeff didn't have a shitload of cash, Gretchen never would have dated him. Tamra says "She takes that poor man for a ride for $1.7 million and then she's going to sit there and cry and say "Oh God, oh God. The girl is a filthy, nasty whore."
Gretchen is in the room saying that she thought Tamra was her friend, but then she saw what Tamra was saying behind her back and realizes what an idiot she was to think that.
Tamra says that Gretchen is a liar and a coniver (sp?). She has a bad reputation in Orange County. Tamra wants to be around wholesome people, people who take care of their families, people with jobs who work for a living instead of preying on old men.
Lynne says that she doesn't want to take sides because she loves them both. She starts crying that she stayed up until 4 in the morning preparing for this dinner party. Why?
GRETCHEN
Gretchen is in Laguna Niguel setting up a "tanning party" at someone's house. She tells us that ever since the dinner party, she's needed to have this party with her friends. Well, I know when I'm stressed about life stuff, all I want to do is spray paint my body with all of my friends. WTF? These people need to get jobs. OK, so she first says "ever since that night at the St. Regis" and apparently it was the night before this "tanning party". So dumb. So she tells her mom (who looks younger than Jeff btw) that it got really ugly. Slade says that Tamra has nothing. He says that she's never been successful at anything and unless she's talking shit about someone, she has nothing to talk about. Hmmm, sounds a lot like Gretchen, too, Slade. I mean, she has this tanning party to get away from that part of her life and all she does is bitch about Tamra. Gretchen says that she's trying to rise above it. She asks "how long have I 'rised' above it?" Hmmm...I'd say about as long as you retained elementary school English. Gretchen's mom is smart and gives her good advice. She tells her to rise above it and that she's not going to change Tamra. All she can do is change her reaction to her. Lynne and her daughter show up. Alexa asks if she can have one beer and Lynne says absolutely not and she's shocked that Alexa would even ask that. If Alexa felt comfortable enough to ask, clearly it's happened before.
Slade is getting a spray tan and calls Gretchen over to see him with a sock over his peen. He doesn't want tan lines. Wow. Lynne is up next and she doesn't want her fake boobs to have tan lines. BUT, she's modest so she doesn't want to show her boobs to everyone. Why not? You paid for them! So, when she has to put her arms out, Gretchen comes in and covers her boobs for her. Oh good Lord. These women are insane.
TAMRA
Tamra and Vicki are having lunch. Simon is selling Tequila now. I thought he worked for Mercedes. Tamra says that he's doing whatever sells. Tamra says that their income is down. Vicki interviews that she doesn't understand what Simon is doing with his tequila business. She says that in these times, he should do what he does best: sell cars. Not tequila. She's got a point, but it's really none of her business. Tamra announces to Vicki that she and Simon are moving. They owe more on than house than it's worth. NO WAY! She and Simon were living beyond their means??? I don't believe it. Vicki interviews that she knows Tamra shops, looks great, works out, etc., but at the end of the day, she needs to go out and look for a job. A-MEN!
JEANNA
Jeanna says that she specializes in homes over $2 million so her market has really tanked in the last year. Essentially she specializes in homes that sell themselves. She's had to readjust. She's sold some watches, a couple of cars, some artwork. Jeanna is showing a house and she says that if she can sell that house she won't have to sell her house because it would be over $300K in commission. She's showing a house that is $12 million furnished/$9 million unfurnished. It's from Malcolm Forbes' collection. Jeanna interviews that she's struggling, Tamra and Simon are struggling, she's not sure about Gretchen but the only one not struggling is Vicki. Now, Vicki can be annoying, but she's smart with her money. She works hard, but I bet she saves, too. She wouldn't be selling her house like Tamra & Jeanna because she spent everything she earned. Jeanna tells us that Vicki also works 15 hours/day which isn't the way to do it either. Um, it is if you have a family to support. These women are lazy. Jeanna says the other ladies don't have to work because they have husbands who take care of them, but she doesn't so she's had to step up her game and work harder.
VICKI
Brianna finished her 7 year nursing program in 3 years so for her graduation, Vicki is taking her to Italy. Vicki tells us that she works hard so she can bless her family. She wants to enjoy the fruits of her labor. I'm with Vicki. She takes it to an extreme, but I totally see her point. It's just Vicki, Brianna and Vicki's mom going to Italy...the boys are staying behind. Vicki is such an annoying packer. She has three outfits for everyday they are in Italy which means 30 outfits. She and I are so the opposite. Brianna tells Vicki that she's not carrying any of her luggage. Vicki says that she doesn't know how many shoes to take and Brianna tells her to take only what she can carry. HAHA.
GRETCHEN
Gretchen is having a garage sale at Jeff's - err, Gretchen's house. I love that Gretchen says she wasn't a golddigger because Jeff wasn't a bagillionaire who left her millions and millions of dollars. No, Gretchen. But he was a millionaire who left you $1.7 million. That still makes you a golddigger. When your garage looks out onto a fence, maybe you should have a "garage sale" somewhere else where traffic actually passes by.
LYNNE
Lynne and Raquel - her daughter - are at the plastic surgeon's office. I guess this is what mothers and daughters do in Orange County. So wrong in so many ways. Lynne says that there is a lot of competition in the OC, so they are coming to meet with the doctor. WTF? Lynne tells Raquel that the doc is going to tell her she's perfect. Then she says "You already look like a Playboy bunny." Ok, I think it's totally creepy for a mother to think it's great that her 19 year old daughter looks like a Playboy bunny. These people are so ass backwards. Lynne is up first. The doc is telling her what she needs to do to her face to look 12 years younger. They should just talk to my mom. My mother is 63 years old and she looks about 53. No surgery. She just doesn't try so hard and eats healthy. Lynne says that she thinks what she's doing is positive for the girls so that they will look good when they are her age. Is she serious?? What an idiot. Yes, teach your teenage daughters to get plastic surgery when they don't feel good about their outward appearance. Forget the fact that they are stupid, entitled, spoiled brats.
Next up, Raquel. This is so wrong. I feel like this is child abuse. Who brings their kid to the plastic surgeon?? Lynne says that Raquel has always had low self esteem. So to boost her confidence, Lynne thought it would be good to get her some plastic surgery. I...I just don't know what to say. This whole scene is so disturbing. Maybe Lynne just feels like her daughter is stupid and will never be successful on her own, so she might as well be pretty? The doc is telling her how he's going to fix the "bump" - that is barely noticeable - on her nose. Raquel interviews that last year for her birthday, she got a BMW and this year she's getting a nose job. These people make me sick. The doc says they will be in "mother/daughter recovery" and Lynne says that will be "awesome."
VICKI
The girls are in Italy and about to board a private shuttle to Rome. Vicki is the typical loud American with way too much luggage who complains about everything. They get to the hotel and it's small. Of course it is. If you go to Europe and stay in a European hotel, it's not going to be overdone like American hotels. The rooms are small, the lobby is small, the stairwell is small. It's OLD! Vicki packed 4 pieces of luggage and Brianna and the grandma have three between them. Vicki is wondering how she's going to get her luggage up the stairs. I bet the Italians loathe Vicki. And now Vicki is bitching that the elevator is too small. She was expecting the Four Seasons. WRONG.
They have a personal tour guide. I feel like this is such a depressing way to see Rome. Rome is one of my favorite European cities. I LOVE Rome. But the best part about it is walking around the city and one minute you're on a busy street and the next minute, you're at the Colliseum. It's so old and beautiful. You can't really appreciate Rome in a car. After that, they go shopping. Vicki says that she didn't like shopping on the tiny Italian streets, she prefers South Coast Shopping Center. OMG! People like Vicki should not be allowed to travel. Seriously, she's an embarassment to America.
LYNNE
Lynne is having lunch with her daughters, Raquel and Alexa. Raquel says that she wants a nose job for her birthday. Alexa says "Raquel, are you serious?" and Lynne looks Alexa like she asked the strangest question. Alexa tells Raquel that she looks great and shouldn't try to change herself and she's not saying that because she's her family. Alexa tells her that she's perfect and should be thankful for what she has. Wow, that actually sounded ... smart. Then Lynne tells Alexa that she's getting a facelift. Alexa looks really upset. Alexa is crying and gets up to leave and goes into the bathroom. So Lynne goes into the bathroom with her.
Alexa: "It pisses me off that it's just, like, Raquel just, like, wants, like, a new thing changed. I just like her the way she is. I feel like you guys keep changing, and I don't want you guys to change." (crying) "I want, like, you guys to be the same, still."
Alexa interviews that so much is changing and she feels that "they" (lynne and raquel) are getting so materialistic about every little thing. It's sad when the 17 year old daughter sounds smarter than the older sister AND the mother.
Of course, Lynne blows it off and says that Alexa is a teenager and very emotional right now. WTF?? This family is so screwed up.
Then, Alexa has to go and prove that she's related to these crazy people and complains that Raquel got a $30K car last year and now she's getting plastic surgery which is more money. And all Alexa got for her birthday was a cake. Alexa wants to know what she gets. So Lynne disregards everything that Alexa said before about them changing and thinks this is about Lynne spending money on Raquel.
JEANNA
Jeanna and Kara are shopping at H&M. Kara tells her mom that this is where she shops when she has to pay for stuff herself. Ouch. Kara says that she just transferred to UCLA, her dream school. :) She tells her mom that they call her sorority "Visa Visa Mastercard" because it's the "rich girl" sorority. Kara says if that's the case, then she's in the wrong sorority. Jeanna tells her that she's rich in her standards. Kara is waiting tables and paying for her own rent. Good for her. I like Kara. She's a little bratty, but she's also really smart and independant. GO BRUINS!!
Jeanna tells Kara about the drama at the St. Regis. Kara asks if Gretchen was cheating on Jeff and Jeanna says she doesn't know. Kara says that she can understand why Tamra is upset and Jeanna is shocked. She asks her WHY? Kara says that Tamra was brought into this situation. Jeanna says "Whatever. Some guy calls you looking for his girlfriend..." and Kara cuts her off and says "you just said, 'looking for his GIRLFRIEND'". Jeanna says "whatever".
VICKI
The girls are at a Roman Bistro. UGH! There she goes...the ugly American is at it again. She asks the waiter if the restaurant specializes in Merlots or Cabs. The waiter asks her if she's interested in a particular region and Vicki says that she's used to California wines. DUMBASS. You are in ITALY, Vicki. Haven't you ever heard the expression "when in Rome"??? For the love of God. I feel for you, Italians. I apologize to you for having to put up with Vicki. She's totally that American who probably HATES when people who visit America don't speak English. Yet, she goes to Italy and doesn't even try to communicate. She's totally annoyed that they can't understand her.
TAMRA
Tamra and Simon are at dinner with Jim and Alexis. Jim and Simon know each other through "business deals". Jim is the typical, ugly, chubby white guy with a totally plastic wife. She's not even that pretty because she just looks completely reconstructed. Tamra says that Jim and Alexis remind her of Tamra and Simon when they were first married. They are all kissy and close. Alexis says that she and Jim have only been apart 2 days since they were married. She says that she doesn't want to be anywhere without him because he's her soulmate. Man, he must be LOADED. Tamra is having a hard time not comparing herself to Jim and Alexis. So Simon and Tamra argue. Simon asks Tamra "when was the last time I was wrong?" Jim says "are you serious?" Simon says that when it comes to stuff with Tamra, he's never wrong. If he doesn't know the answer, he doesn't say anything. Jim tells him that Simon is not always right. Nice. Simon is just too competitive. I think he likes having the trophy wife. He likes being smarter, making more money and being in charge. It makes him feel better to be with someone he feels superior to. Tamra is that girl.
TAMRA
Tamra asks a realtor to come help them figure out what to do about their house. Tamra tells him that they spent about $400K in upgrades. Tamra interviews that she never really understood how "money" could ruin a relationship. But they went from having all this money and not having any problems to having serious financial issues and the stress is really putting a strain on the relationship. They have $0 equity in the house. Tamra says that their blood, sweat and tears are in this house and they built it from the ground up. Ok, here's my problem with this. Tamra has contributed close to NOTHING to that house except live in it. Simon paid for it, probably entirely by himself with no contribution from Tamra. He probably paid for the decorator to come and help Tamra pick out colors and furniture. And, they probably had a housekeeper and gardener to keep it up - that Simon paid for. So, what did she do?? Tamra is crying about giving up the house.
See you next week.
No comments:
Post a Comment